Is it wrong to ask a trans person you're about to date about their genitals?
I don't want to offend anyone, so I thought I'd ask you guys for advice. I'm on Grindr quite a bit and I've noticed quite a few trans people on there who have tapped me or sent me a message.
The only thing is this - I'm interested in some of these guys, but I'm really not into the idea of a vagina, if they are pre-op - so can I ask a person about their genital status?
Is that wrong?
I'm not trans - but I am in the dating pool!
I think it's context and expectation - like
1) would you normally ask someone about their genitals on a dating / hook up - on Grindr this is almost aways "yes" or at least a photo swap, so maybe asking wouldn't be considered "out of the norm"
2) If what's between a person's legs is a complete dealbreaker to you, it might worth asking so that neither of you are wasting each other's time
3) It's how you ask - maybe you can ask about roles first - Top, Bottom and Vers and take the conversation from there.
4) Wait and see if the person you're talking too offers the information, rather than ask for it.