THEGAYUK

Category: Review

  • THEATRE REVIEW | F*cking Men

    I was all set in my mind to hate this; I imagined it being hammy, awkward and amateur. It was, after all, a play about gay sex lives to be performed in the back of a pub. I had images in my mind of either uncomfortable soft-core porn or over-pretentious dramatics involving a man in clown makeup reading poetry and eating an apple.

    The play follows the intertwining lives of 10 gay men, tackling the usual gay issues of fidelity, trust and sex. Yes, of course, there’s a character who’s an escort in there. It wouldn’t be gay theatre if there wasn’t.

    The setting was simple, if amateurish, reminding me of the various performances we put on during A-level drama exam week. Although if the boys in my school looked ANYTHING like the cast I would never have left.

    Which brings us on to the most important part, the cast. They were fantastic. Those who weren’t stunningly gorgeous were hilarious and heartfelt. In fact many were gorgeous and heartfelt, a combination you don’t actually see in real life… so maybe a bit of realism lost there. Some of the acting was a little laboured; feeling over the top and out of place for such a small and intimate setting. When there were fight scenes you heard the fake slap, and when there were screaming matches you got wet. And not in a good way.

    The initial intimacy of the play can be a bit overwhelming, but the rhythm of the scene changes is consistently good and you’re easily moved from one character’s story to another. Some of the best characters aren’t introduced until towards the end, by that I mean both the funniest character and then arguably the hottest character. Despite its low budget, the show is still appealing to a wide audience, nothing too gay niche to prevent the characters from being relatable.

    I am forced to wonder, however, if the play would have been as engrossing if the cast weren’t as beautiful as they were. The good thing is you don’t need to find out.

    Entertaining and full of eye-candy. Go and see F*cking Men at the King’s Head Theatre, Islington before the end of it’s run in September (extended for another month due to popular demand).

    Worth it even if you’re just looking for new entries in your spank bank.

  • BOOK REVIEW | Expose

    Exposé is a triumph for first-time novelist Paul Ilett.

    Welcome to the world of news media, particularly the murky world of the tabloid: celebrity reporting, the relentless stalking of VIPS, undermining of governments and exposing political hypocrisy are all just a part of a another hum-drum day at the office activity.

    This is a world where the saucy details of personalities, peers and people of note are exposed for the world’s entertainment. Sometimes you don’t even have to be famous to get your unwelcome share of the limelight.

    Paul Ilett’s brand new book Exposé whips and slams newsprint media with a savvy, electric and clever exposé of the shady world of selling tomorrow’s fish and chip paper. With the Leveson enquiry still biting the industry, and the crash of the News Of The World still fresh in our memories, Exposé is a well timed reminder that all eyes are on the tabloids that trade in smut, in order to shift copies. We’ve been promised reform and self-regulation, but is that what we’re getting or is it just business as usual?

    The Daily Ear, thinly veiled for what reads like a real life title, is under attack when openly gay, hugely popular actor Adam Jaymes (think a British Jonathan Groff mixed with Matt Bomer), wages war against the infamous tabloid. He’s got a personal vendetta against the columnists, editors and owners of the rag – and he’s treating them to their own medicine, with a number of well-orchestrated, scandalous exposés of various members of the Daily Ear’s editorial team and the Harvey News Empire, the owners of the paper.

    Brilliantly observed (the author is a former journalist), and devilishly demanding, Ilett’s debut is a f**king riot, can’t-pit-it-downer, that the huge media empires should be worried about.

     

    BUY IT NOW FROM AMAZON

  • CAR REVIEW | Citroen C4 Cactus

    Citroen has a long history of producing unconventional cars. 2CV, DS and C6, all vehicles that combined quirky looks and engineering with a focus on comfort above all else.

    Although recent efforts from the French marque have been a little soberer, the C4 Cactus looks to recapture Citroen’s weird and wonderful heritage in a Ford Focus-sized hatchback with more than a hint of SUV about it. Is it a case of style over substance though? Let’s put it to the test.

    The first thing you’ll probably notice about the Cactus are the knobbles on the doors. Called ‘Airbumps’, they consist of air pockets in a rubbery material and are designed to protect paintwork against unwanted attention from trolleys, car doors and other urban attacks. You may not like how they look but they certainly offer a decent amount of protection and come in a range of colours. Black is standard but you can also choose grey, off white and brown. Opt for the latter and you’ll probably be craving a bar of Dairy Milk every time you see them.

    The Airbumps may be a bit Marmite (for the record, I love them) but the rest of the Cactus is much easier to like. Black plastic wheel arches, skidplates like lower bumpers and roof rails suggest SUV while the slim daytime running lights make for a distinctive face. The floating roof looks good as do the standard fit alloy wheels on both Feel and Flair models. One thing is for certain, you’ll have no trouble finding it in a car park especially if you opted for ‘Hello Yellow’ as modelled by the test car.

    Inside things are also on the unconventional side; look around the cabin and you’ll notice very few buttons, switches or knobs. That’s because almost everything including climate control and stereo functions are controlled by the standard and easy to use 7” touchscreen infotainment system. Another digital display behind the steering wheel replaces conventional dials while the front seats are more like armchairs. Choose the automatic gearbox and the front seats are replaced by a sofa-like bench while those that have difficulty parking may appreciate the surprisingly effective optional self-park feature.

    Legroom for rear seat passengers is impressive for this size of car although headroom may be a little tight for taller adults. The seats are comfy however and you get a great view out of the panoramic glass roof. To save weight you don’t get wind down rear windows, instead they pop out at the rear edge and only open an inch or two. While this may be annoying, it has allowed Citroen to create a cavity for additional elbow room and space for a 1.5 litre bottle of drink.

    Saving weight is a theme that runs throughout the Cactus and while it has resulted in plenty of low rent plastic (including a very bendy rear panel under the tailgate) it has worked. Even top spec models come in at less than 1100kgs or lighter than a Ford Fiesta. That means engines don’t have to be big to get the job done keeping fuel consumption low. There’s a 1.6 litre diesel for maximum economy and a considerably cheaper normally aspirated 1.2 petrol in two power outputs.

    More interesting is the turbocharged version of the petrol engine with a decent 110bhp. The three cylinder unit has bags of torque to give 0-60 in a zingy 9.3 seconds and makes an appealingly thrummy noise in the process. Throttle response is a little soft and it is easy to hit the rev limiter although overall it was a characterful little engine that gave around 44mpg over a week of mixed driving. Without trying too hard, I was able to get over 50mpg helped by a start & stop system for the engine.

    Don’t be misled by the Cactus’ surprising turn of pace though, you wouldn’t call it a driver’s car. There is entertainment to be had in a roly poly kind of way and you can even feel the tail getting edgy like an 80’s or 90’s French hatchback. What you never get is any detailed feedback or sense that the suspension has been carefully set up. It’s softly sprung and softly damped but the big wheels rob the car of a properly plush ride. It is however more comfy than much of the competition though.

    Overall there’s a lot to like about the Cactus range. All share the same distinctive styling, user friendly touchscreen and spacious interior while the turbocharged petrol engine is a good little motor. Complaints? Well the boot may be capacious but there’s an awkwardly high loading lip while it does feel a little cheap inside considering you can pay nearly £19k for one. To be fair though, even lower rung models have a fair amount of kit while you can save a few quid by not opting for the turbocharged motors. Citroen have a habit of heavily discounting cars too. If you’re in the market for a distinctive and roomy runaround then the Cactus should be on your list of cars to try.

    PROS

    Punchy engine

    Distinctive looks

    Roomy

    CONS

    Can get expensive

    Cheap feeling plastics

    Handling can get ragged

    THE LOWDOWN

    Car – Citroen C4 Cactus Flair PureTech 110 S&S

    Price – £17,290 (£18,985 as tested)

    Power – 110hp

    0-60 – 9.3 seconds

    Top Speed – 117 mph

    Co2 – 107g/km

  • REVIEW: Hypoxi, How I Lost Inches Of My Body and Half A Stone In Weight

    Low slung jeans and vest tops, that’s all I’m rocking this summer and it’s all because of a wetsuit, some piping and a lot of science. Okay, it’s a lot more complicated than that…

    The before and after….

    When the press release about Hypoxi hit my inbox my cynical journo brain kicked in. What was presented seemed yet another weight loss system that promised the world but probably would deliver nothing, but with celebrity fans such as Victoria Beckham and Katie Price and a wealth of science and research committed to the system, who am I to ignore the call of snake hips? So off I popped into their South Woodford branch where the ultra friendly Sylwia and her team greeted me.

    Essentially, you step into a suit, take a 30-minute walk and lose weight without trying. Sounds too good to be true, but within just 6 sessions I could tell it was working.

    I have to say as you’re squeezed into the neoprene patented Hypoxi suit and step on to the treadmill that weight loss is the furthest thing from your mind. My first thought was ‘okay, where is the camera?’ I felt I was going to turn up on Candid Camera or You’ve Been Framed, but when the suit is hooked up to the vacuum system, your thoughts turn from Candid Camera to Jules Verne’s Twenty Thousand Leagues Under The Sea, as around 125 compression cups suck and massage at your abdomen, lower stomach and love handles – all those problematic areas which tend to be the most difficult areas to shift fat from.

    It’s not that unpleasant, but it’s certainly a strange feeling as you take a stroll at a leisurely pace on the treadmill hooked up to a machine that breathes life in and out of the vacusuit suit.

    The suit causes a vacuum to draw out the fatty acids from your body. It makes you sweat. A lot. There is relief as you’re peeled from the suit, looking a little sweaty, but the technicians at Hypoxi have seen it all before and you can take a shower on site if you need.

    After the session you may be left with red marks over your body – this is completely normal Sylwia tells me and shows where the compression cups have massaged your body. The therapy, created and developed by Dr. Egger in Austria, promises to combat cellulite and “stubborn fat deposits and poor connective tissue” resulting in a targeted body shaping experience.

    The next morning after my first session I woke to find I actually felt thinner. Could this actually be working?

    After six sessions I’m definitely thinner and my butt has all but disappeared, my Levis are now low slung. Bravo. At my sixth session weigh in I’ve lost weight.

    My halfway results show that my hip bones have made a welcome return and I have lost nearly half a stone and I’m told I’ve lost 13.5cms around my upper body.

    I’m hooked. Along with my normal health regime (with cheat days) I have managed to achieve something that months of normal gym visits would have accomplished but in under 3 weeks.

    It’s a little pricey, around £50 per session or around £500 for 12, but if you look around you can get a good deal and it’s well worth considering if you, like me, have tried and failed at losing those last few pounds or that pad of fat that just doesn’t seem to want to shift.

    Find out more at Http://www.hypoxiwls.co.uk or call 02089892700.

  • THEATRE REVIEW | Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, The Musical

    With just the right balance of charm, smarm and quintessential Englishness, Michael Praed plays Lawrence Jameson, a con man who spends his time in the French Riviera swindling money from the rich women using his good looks, his faithful partner in crime, Andre (Mark Benton) and a tired old story about him being the Prince of a revolution-torn country.

    His unchallenged reign as king of the swindlers comes to an end with the arrival of Freddy Benson (Noel Sullivan), an uncouth, inexperienced and rough around the edges con man hoping to make his fortune. Lawrence agrees to take Freddy under his wing, but their initial prosperous partnership falters when they enter into a bet to see who can swindle $50,000 from a young lady first, leading to an increasing rivalry between the two.

    Utilising a versatile, art deco influenced set which ably adapted to define a large number of specific locations, this production contained a set of decent, toe tapping and comfortingly familiar sounding songs, with snappy lyrics and lively presentation. The opening number, “Give Them What They Want” set the tone nicely, and the cowboy inspired ensemble piece “Oklahoma?” was a delightfully flamboyant, camp and fun number with its tongue planted firmly in its cheek, proving to be a highlight of the show.

    The show blended both a witty script packed with one liners and a lot of physical comedy; providing a number of genuine laugh out loud moments. The three leads were well cast, with Praed really impressing with his natural performance, Benton being as reliable as ever as the comedy sidekick, and Noel Sullivan putting in an unexpectedly impressive and confident turn.

    What I did like about this show was that the set, presentation, tone, structure and even the musical numbers were steeped in the traditional elements of the classic musicals, giving the whole thing a feel of familiarity, but the characterisations went over and above the usual musical fayre, the story was more in depth and the departure from the usual “will they/won’t they” love story made a pleasant change. My only real criticism was that the second act couldn’t quite match the pace of the first act, and was more uneven in the spacing of its musical numbers, leading to the latter act feeling a little stretched out, particularly as the show drew to a close. Cutting ten minutes out of the second act would have made all the difference.

    It was with some slight apprehension that I approached Dirty Rotten Scoundrels – a musical based on a fairly mediocre late 1980’s film which I never particularly liked; a lengthy running time and a handful of unfamiliar songs. But one of the things I love about theatre is its constant ability to surprise, and this production was no exception.

    Overall, Dirty Rotten Scoundrels proved to be remarkably fun, coming across as an odd hybrid of Hairspray, The Producers, Top Hat and High Society. Far better than the film on which it is based, it transpired to be a show which I enjoyed it far more than I ever thought I would.

    Dirty Rotten Scoundrels is currently at Sheffield Lyceum until the 29th August 2015 (www.sheffieldtheatres.co.uk) before continuing on its national tour until 28th November 2015. For details, see the official website at www.scoundrelsontour.com

  • THEATRE REVIEW | The Clinic, Kings Head Theatre

    What happens when you go to a clinic? Well, if you’ve been taking drugs and having lots of unsafe sex, then you might be more likely be HIV+. The new play “The Clinic” explores this scenario, and so much more.

    Not so much a play but more of a health education lesson, “The Clinic” is produced by David Stuart, the Lead Substance Use Advisor at 56 Dean Street (a London sexual health clinic based in the heart of Soho), and written by Patrick Cash (writer for QX Magazine).

    We are introduced to characters that we may recognize and identify with, portrayed by a cast of London scenesters. DJ Stewart Who plays a sexual health advisor at the clinic; he used to be a drug addicted party animal but now he dispenses HIV advice and results to men much younger than him.

    Then there’s the wealthy businessman (Matthew Hodson) who enjoys sex with young men and thinks that he can buy them his love and affection. He’s also in HIV denial.

    Zacharian Fletcher is the confused young man, an extreme party boy who likes to go clubbing and take drugs, not necessarily in that order. He’s also into chillouts (orgies). And he’s got HIV. He meets (via Grinder) Damien Killen’s character, a young respectable guy who seems to have a good head on his shoulders, is handsome with a good body, who came to London only to somehow become HIV+. He feels like he’s no longer desired but now damaged.

    Then there’s Shirley (Pretty Miss Cairo). She runs a Vauxhall beauty clinic which acts as a sanctuary for the drugged out boys when the clubs close.

    These characters may not be real people, but they are composites of characters that Cash met and interviewed after 56 Dean Street commissioned him to write this play. He interviewed not just the people who work at the clinic but some of the patients as well.

    It’s a bare bones production, played in the very warm King’s Head Theatre in Angel (take a bottle of water with you, and a hand fan). And the cast should be admired for taking part in this play. It’s difficult at times to hear some of the dialogue (Stewart Who seems to be muttering his words while Fletcher is so soft-spoken I could hardly hear him at all), but Hodson (who is perfect as the villian), Miss Cairo and Killeen more than make up for the play’s faults.

    And as you enter the theatre before the play starts, you are given a glossary of terms referred to in the play. There were several words in the glossary that I had never heard of before, so I did learn something new by going to see the play ‘The Clinic.’

    It’s a perfect setting for a gay play, a place where we’ve all been to.

    ‘The Clinic’ is now playing at the Kings Head Theatre in London until August 29th.

    To buy tickets, please click here:

     

  • CAR REVIEW | Fiat 500s Convertible

    If I were to ask you to list small car icons, I would bet my trousers that two names would be at or near the top of the list; the MINI and the Fiat 500.

    As you may have guessed from the accompanying pictures, it’s not the bite-size Brit we’re looking at here (don’t worry, I’ll be covering that soon enough) but the eeny-meeny Italian. Specifically we’re looking at the sporty ‘S’ variant with in this instance a convertible roof. With the basic design now eight years old, is it still a competitor in the stylish supermini stakes?

    There’s one good reason why the 500 has proved such a success for Fiat; its looks. Launched exactly 50 years after the original, it cleverly references the much smaller 50’s 500 without appearing to be a caricature of itself like the MINI. That the 500 is taller than much of the competition helps to keep the proportions right while also giving plenty of headroom.

    While the 500 has always traded on cutesy looks and retro charm, those wanting a bit more aggression without the performance or price of the hot Abarth versions should definitely check out the ‘S’. Sitting near the top of the range, it gains much manlier bumpers packed full of vents, satin chrome trim as well as some racy side skirts and stylish 15” alloy wheels. Inside are sports seats, 7” TFT display for the driver, alloy gear knob, a chunky flat-bottomed leather steering wheel and lashings of red stitching.

    S spec also gets an exclusive colour option – Electronica blue – which proved slightly controversial among friends. While it’s undoubtedly a great colour, some questioned its suitability on such a retro shape. They may have a point. What is undeniable is the effectiveness of the dinky 900cc TwinAir petrol engine. Although less than a litre in capacity and with only two cylinders, a turbocharger pushes power to 105 hp and 107 Ib ft of torque when Sports mode is engaged.

    Without this button pressed, the 500 feels very different, power drops to 98 hp while torque plummets to 89 Ib ft. Throttle response feels quite lazy which coupled with very light steering makes the car feel almost asleep. The aim of the game is, of course, maximum economy, the digital display in front of you even shows an eco score along with your current mpg and range. It’s certainly effective but hides the car’s true character.

    Sport mode on, the steering takes on a bit of extra heft while throttle response is transformed. There’s still a little delay as you’d expect with a turbocharged motor but after that the 500 surges forward. The high-mounted gearlever may seem odd at first but is fantastically placed for quick gearchanges and has a fantastic shift action. The TwinAir lump up front makes a rorty noise that seems to egg you on into driving it harder, something you’ll gladly do. There’s even a g-meter and boost gauge on the TFT screen to replace the eco stuff.

    Eager is the best way I can describe the handling and indeed the overall driving experience. The 500 feels darty and agile with strong grip and little roll, enjoyable on a country road and perfection for city streets. You do pay for the handling in ride comfort though, it’s by no means uncomfortable but you do feel undulations while the rear end can get bouncy over bigger bumps.

    Should you want to go topless, the electric sliding soft top moves rearwards at the touch of a button even on the move. Press it again and the whole hood folds above the boot lid giving, even more, exposure although it does remove almost all rearward visibility in the process. Unlike the Mini Cabrio, the whole roof doesn’t fold back, only the centre section. It may rob you of some of the openness a ‘proper’ cabriolet will give you but it does make for a stiffer structure. You do still feel the odd tremor from the chassis though.

    The fabric roof also prevents the fitment of a hatchback. Instead, you get a small upwardly opening boot lid that leads to a boot barely any smaller than the regular 500’s. Move forward into the cabin and you’ll find two comfortable rear seats with acceptable levels of legroom for the class. Up front is well laid out but lacking the quality feel of a MINI or even a VW Up! At least the bits you interact with most, the leather wheel and metal gear knob feel good in your hands.

    Unfortunately, the 500 TwinAir’s biggest weakness is highlighted by one of its strongest assets, how fun to drive it is. If you’re driving Miss Daisy and not working the turbo hard, then more than 50 mpg is possible. If however, you start having fun and lean on the throttle harder, economy tumbles significantly. Not only can it be expensive to run, it’s quite pricey to buy too.

    You can pick up a basic 500 for just over £10,000 but you’ll need to add another £3,000 for the convertible top and over £1,600 for S trim. You can’t even get the 105 hp motor in lower trim levels and that’s over £1,600 more too. After a handful of options, the test car came in at £17,430, a figure you could easily push higher with some of the personalisation on offer.

    Of course, you might look at it the other way, there are not many other open-topped cars out there that can be picked up for comfortably less than £20,000. There’s also no denying the charm of the 500 and enjoyment you get out of driving it. You can’t say that about certain cars costing more than twice as much. Objectivity isn’t something that will necessarily come into play in the purchase of a 500 though. For some the looks will be more than enough, thankfully beauty, in this case, is more than skin deep.

    PROS

    Punchy engine

    Styling

    Fun to drive

    CONS

    Can be thirsty

    Pricey

    Cheap interior plastics

    The Lowdown

    Car – Fiat 500S Convertible

    Price – £16,740 (£17,520 as tested)

    Power – 105 hp

    0-60 – 10 seconds

    Top Speed – 117 mph

    Co2 – 99g/km

  • CAR REVIEW | Mitsubishi Outlander PHEV

    148 miles per gallon. That is the official fuel consumption figure for Mitsubishi’s Outlander PHEV, an amazing figure for a big, heavy four wheel drive vehicle.

    Coupled to road tax that will currently cost you nothing, exemption from the London congestion charge along with a tiny 5% benefit in kind rate for company car drivers and it’s no surprise that they’re an increasingly common sight on our roads. It all sounds too good to be true, is it?

    Naturally you’ll be wondering how such a big 4×4 could possibly achieve such tiny fuel consumption. The key is in the name, specifically the PHEV bit; that stands for Plug in Hybrid Electric Vehicle. Under the boot floor is a battery pack large enough to power the Outlander for 32 miles without once relying on petrol power. Unlike many other hybrids, this battery doesn’t just get charged by the engine, you can plug it into the mains too.

    Once the electricity is all gone, there’s a conventional 2.0 litre petrol engine that can act solely as a generator to charge the battery, drive the wheels or a combination of both. The trouble is that if you rely too much on the engine the fuel economy starts to drop off a cliff. After a long drive on the motorway and with the battery virtually empty the economy dropped to just under 36mpg, a figure that is bettered by the majority of diesel SUVs.

    So is it all smoke and mirrors? In a word, no. If you’re one of the millions of motorists who don’t even manage 30 miles a day then the vast majority of journeys will cost you pence in electric rather than pounds in petrol. If you’re lucky enough to work somewhere you can plug it in then you can effectively double that range. According to Mitsubishi’s maths, on a single charge, 106 miles is the point at which a diesel would be more economical.

    For most people then, it’s a cheap car to run. It’s not terribly expensive considering the sheer size and complexity of it either. The cheapest Outlander PHEV is less than £29,000 yet still comes with keyless entry, 18” alloys, climate control, Bluetooth and iPod connectivity. Start to climb the range for niceties like sat nav, a premium audio system and swathes of leather and the price starts to get very close to £40,000 before options. BMW and Mercedes territory then.

    At first glance it’s pretty convincing. Externally it’s a quietly handsome shape that shys away from some of the crazier flourishes seen on other SUVs. There’s a little chrome but not enough to be garish giving a classy overall look. Inside the top spec GX5h test vehicle there’s red leather seats with matching trim on the dash, doors, steering wheel and even cupholders. It’s attractive enough but the level of finish is undoubtedly behind premium rivals. Wrinkly leather is not nice.

    Rear seat passengers are treated to vast amounts of legroom but seats that are an odd shape and quite hard too. Still, this was a fresh car so maybe a bit of use would soften them up. Behind the seats is a huge boot but no option of a third row of seats due to the battery pack. Oddly, you still get a couple of cupholders back there, however. The top half of the range also benefits from a powered tailgate that can be opened and closed from the key fob, handy.

    Those of you that love a bit of tech might also appreciate the Mitsubishi Remote Control on higher trim levels that lets you schedule charging, check battery levels and even turn the air conditioning on remotely through your smartphone. To accompany this you also get a 7” touchscreen infotainment system with sat nav that proved easy to work once you got to know it a little. The uprated Alpine speakers in the test car provided great sound quality too.

    To drive the Outlander proved to be a well-engineered bit of kit. Even with drive switching between petrol and electric acceleration was smooth without nasty jolts while noise levels were generally low. A flattened throttle pedal gets the engine screaming thanks to a CVT gearbox that keeps the engine at peak power, effective but loud. There’s also a little lag between nailing the throttle and actually getting full power. Not an issue under normal driving but slightly frustrating when trying to accelerate onto a busy roundabout for instance. It isn’t particularly quick either, 0-60mph takes around 11 seconds.

    Handling wise there is less body roll than you might expect but still noticeably more than a normal car or a BMW X3 for that matter. Although fairly neutral when cornered hard, it predictably understeers at the limit for safe if uninvolving progress. Still, this isn’t going to be a car you buy for fun, if driven sensibly you appreciate how easy it is to drive and how quiet it is. With decent ride comfort as well, it’ll prove good enough for most prospective owners.

    Should you buy one then? Well to benefit from the potential fuel savings you need to be able to plug it in somewhere and not be travelling too far too regularly. If that applies to you then there’s plenty to recommend. Even looking past the potential fuel savings, the Outlander looks good, is well equipped for the money and overall feels well made (looking past some of the iffy interior trim). No wonder they’re selling so well.

    PROS

    • Huge inside
    • Cheap to run. Mostly.
    • Well equipped

    CONS

    • Expensive on long journeys
    • Not as premium feeling as some rivals
    • Uninspiring to drive

    THE LOWDOWN

    • Car – Mitsubishi Outlander PHEV GX5h
    • Price – £38,399 on the road (after £5,000 government grant)
    • Power – 200bhp (combined)
    • 0-60 – 11.0 seconds
    • Top Speed – 106mph
    • Co2 – 44g/km

  • CAR REVIEW | Toyota GT86

    Toyota has produced plenty of icons over the years. From the bruising twin-turbo Supra as seen in The Fast & The Furious to the lightweight and nimble MR2 sportscar or legendary Landcruiser, the Japanese marque has catered well for the petrolhead. Does the GT86 live up to this tradition?

    First impressions on this occasion are slightly skewed by the test car’s distinctly non-standard appearance. Designed for the Goodwood Festival of Speed and inspired by early 80’s ‘IMSA’ racing Celicas, it boasts glitzy gold 18” wheels from Rota, a performance exhaust from Miltek and V-Maxx lowering springs. The stripes are in vinyl and completely removable (not that I’d want to) making the GT86 stand out anywhere your drive it. If I’m honest, it’s Marmite on wheels and I love it. That the standard car already has a chiselled, muscular appearance with an aggressive front and pert bottom doesn’t hurt. Add the stripes and it’s like a real-life Hot Wheels toy.

    Look past the warpaint and you’ll see the features that make the GT86 such a temptation for those who love to drive. Up front is a 2.0 litre ‘flat’ (so called because the pistons travel horizontally instead of vertically) four engine powering the rear wheels through a six-speed manual gearbox. An automatic is available but seems a little out of place in such a focussed driving machine. A super-low seating position and unusual engine contribute to a centre of gravity just 18 inches above the tarmac, figures a Porsche would be proud of. Out back there’s also a limited slip differential to provide plenty of traction or easily controlled drifts if you prefer.

    Inside there is technically room for four but only on short trips or if you really hate your rear seat passengers. More important are the two heavily sculpted front seats that hold you in place perfectly, small yet chunky steering wheel and a giant rev counter right in front of you. The short reach to the stubby gearlever confirms that this is an environment that’s been geared towards the driver. Thumbing the starter button brings the engine noisily to life with a distinctive burble from the giant rear exhaust pipes. The gear change is mechanical feeling, direct and for the most part very enjoyable apart from the odd notchy moment.

    Those expecting serious firepower will be disappointed, the non-turbo engine produces 197bhp at a giddy 7,000rpm. You really have to rev this motor to get the best from it, while it’ll mooch along with less than 2,000rpm on the dial you need over 4,000 before it really wakes up. Even if you do poke it with a stick, the 0-60mph time of 7.4 seconds is only on par with a BMW 320d. Straight line speed isn’t really the point of a car like the GT86 though. The modest power output means you can use more of the performance more of the time without expecting flashing blue lights in your rear view mirror. It also prevents the car from being too intimidating when it comes to cornering, something it does exceptionally well.

    Even at low speeds, you can feel there is virtually no slack in the suspension, steering or gearbox. Up your pace and you find the GT86 corners with barely any roll and is beautifully balanced. Apart from a slightly sticky feeling around the straight ahead, the steering is very well weighted and fast too. Even with all the electronic nannies turned on you can feel the rear of the car pushing you around corners, given a private track (or deserted roundabout) and you’ll find it’s, even more, fun beyond the limit. A stab of throttle in the first couple of gears can unstick the rear tyres and get you sideways. This is not something to be feared though, a quick flick of the wrists on the steering will catch it by which time you’ll be grinning like a complete idiot.

    Downsides? Well those use to a premium German cabin won’t be bowled over by the GT86’s interior. Although everything seems well made, some of the plastics look a bit cheap compared to a VW or Audi while the overall design is a little behind as well. Those after cheap running costs should look elsewhere too, I averaged around 28mpg while carbon emissions sit at 164g/km for the manual. Ride comfort and general usability also suffered at the hands of the modifications on this car. Over a succession of bumps the GT86 could bounce you almost out of your seat and speed bumps had to be taken at a crawl. Parking was a stressful activity thanks to stretched tyres that left the polished lip of the wheel with no protection from curbs; I managed to avoid damaging them but needed a gangplank to get to the curb most of the time. Then there was the noise, fantastic if you were going for it but the exhaust drone at motorway speeds coupled with the tyre roar and wind noise got old fast. No doubt a standard GT86 would be more agreeable on a day to day basis if a lot less dramatic.

    If you think of a car only as a method of transportation to get you from A to B then the GT86 is not for you. Space is limited in the back, it’s expensive to run and not at all comfortable. If however, you see cars as a thing of pleasure that beg to be driven, the little Toyota will be right up your street. From the moment you approach the GT86 to the moment you glance back towards it as you walk away it makes you happy. For some, the modifications may be too much but for me its pure theatre, I’m smitten.

    PROS

    Handling

    Looks

    Noise when driving hard

    CONS

    Uncomfortable over rough tarmac

    Thirsty

  • RESTAURANT REVIEW | Gaylord, London

    In the Oxford Circus area lies a rather well renowned traditional Indian cuisine restaurant, Gaylord. A typical Indian restaurant vibe via both decor and ambience, which soon filled to maximum capacity on a Tuesday eve, and after 48 years of trading, it’s evident the restaurant has built up many fans. A bottle of Prosecco to match the bubbly atmos. (and a good one at £25 you’ll be tempted to have two).

    True to tradition arrive the airy light and crisp poppadum and an array of pickles and pastes- their slightly sour lime pickle was my favourite closely followed by a minty herby paste which tasted garden fresh zingy. The fresh theme was followed throughout the entire meal from the usually overlooked side salads through to the meat and accompanying sauces etc.

    We ordered from the menu, but as we had been invited to dine at the restaurant, the on duty manager advised he would bring some extras to the table.

    Golgappa Shots (£6.50) were brought to the table; a rather off-putting savoury murky green liquid in six shot glasses, each with a puffed cracker atop. I think the idea is to pour the liquid from the shot glass into the cracker, and then eat. I found the whole thing awkward and unnecessary. There is an option to add a shot of Grey Goose vodka (£5), which could hold the secret to making the tamarind tangy ‘spiced aromatic water’ a little less odd. But I doubt it.

    A nice bit of fusion coming in from Mexico with Gaylord’s taco selection, we shared the Pulled Chicken (£8.50) version which came out from the kitchen presented in the backseat of a metal wire car. Kinda felt like a kids meal was taking a joyride on the wrong table, but the flavour was lovely, being rich, piquant and herby. Amongst the silky pulled chicken I, unfortunately, found a small bone which was a shame.

    Hitching a lift onto the table was the Mix Vegetable Pakoras (£9.50), which were dry and lacked any flavour. The fun is taken out of having a mixture platter when you are unable to identify the different ingredients.

    From the moment the Prawn Puri (£10) arrived to the table, the nightmares of the murky green liquid and garish metal wire cars started to leave us. These prawns looked HENCH. The kind of prawns that eat seahorse for breakfast. Perfect plump juicy king prawns in a very light jalfrezi coating, like a very thin batter almost. When flavour, texture, and the cooking of a humble prawn is so on point- the chemistry is celestial.

    With the table slowly losing any available space, my personally selected starters from the ‘Tribute to royalty; Maharaja Feast’ (£29.50/3 course) arrived in the form of “the best of Gaylord kebabs”. The Lamb Seekh Kebab being minced and sausage-shaped, was well seasoned and abundant in herbs. The chicken kebab being a typical tandoori was my least favourite being a little dry all round. The lamb chop, however, was beautiful, simply spiced and with a plain creamy yoghurt- lamb is so delicious, I can’t bear when its limelight is stolen via a kitchen being overly spice-happy.

    I can’t believe we are only just approaching the main course! The portions are very generous we no way needed the extras brought to the table. The Lamb Rogan Josh as part of my Maharaja Feast which had a citrus gravy with strong cardamom and cinnamon notes, extremely aromatic and came with a cloud of pilau.

    Murg Korma (£15) for my friend with a mushroom pilau. The korma was creamy as you like, with hints of cashews and a suspicion of sweet. The mushroom pilau was really well-cooked rice that had an intense mushroom/umami flavour with a spritz of lemon juice run through there too. Perfect with the korma.

    Lamb Shank (£18- and another off-piste bestowal by the restaurant). The menu dictates a special Gaylord spice mix, however, the flavour was lacking altogether other than the dominant tomato- even with the flesh of the lamb, which subsequently was not falling off the bone.

    You cannot possibly dine in an Indian restaurant without getting your Bombay Aloo on (£8.50). The flavours were tart and chutney-like which always gets thumbs up from me. A kind of candied ginger meets spicy smoky chilli gravy flavour to it- cleverly constructed. I would recommend you order this as a side.

    Dessert was a sharing platter (£8.50) and at this point, I’m not sure what is what in terms of items we ordered. An icy almond-y kulfi stole the show on the platter. Homemade carrot pudding (or Halwa) was served warm and abandoned after sampling as it just was not nice. Rasmalai, cottage cheese patties were spongy and strange- a dish you continue to graze on and wonder about. I enjoy dishes that make you think, and the pistachios alongside were a good call.

    Phew! Food over and done with! I cannot help but feel a little sorry for Gaylord. This review may well have panned out a little better for them if they hadn’t of been so generous and loaded the table up with dishes like the murky Golgappa shots, the taco that had the bone in, that we did not order, and other nothing to sing about dishes I haven’t even typed up (naan/raita).

    We didn’t have much luck with the majority of the starters, other than those perfect prawns. The mains were very good as were the Bombay potatoes. And next time, I would have the kulfi on its own. And yes, I would dine again at Gaylord.

    Reviewed by @LohanJordan

    ADDRESS: 79-81 Mortimer Street, London W1W 7SJ, UK

    PHONE: 020 7580 3615

    PRICE: ££££

    STAR RATING: ***

    TIPPING POLICY: http://gaylordlondon.com/contact.php

  • FILM REVIEW | Ang Lee Trilogy

    Ang Lee is perhaps best known in the LGBT community as the director of Brokeback Mountain, for which he won the Best Director Oscar back in 2005.

    10 years later comes the DVD release of his first three films, known as “The Father Knows Best” trilogy, which share several cast members and explores tensions between old and young, between east and west and between the family and the individual.

    The trilogy picked up two Oscar nominations for Best Foreign Language Film and contain the same emotional maturity and depth as his notable subsequent films (Sense and Sensibility; The Ice Storm; Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon; and The Life of Pi). The three films that make up the trilogy are “Pushing Hands”, “The Wedding Banquet” and “Eat Drink Man Woman”.

    Each start out with the same premise: parents struggling to cope with modernity whilst maintaining their traditional beliefs and their children trying to both appease their parents and embrace modern lives filled with opportunity. However, each has a unique heart capable of breaking yours.

    The best of the bunch is “The Wedding Banquet” which is a culture clash coming-out comedy. “Eat Drink Man Woman” explores the role that food has in Chinese culture – where the art of cooking demonstrates love rather than the easy words “I love you”. And “Pushing Hands” is Ang Lee’s debut feature with the outlines of themes that dominate the remaining films in the trilogy. That said, they are not po-faced dramas.

    There are moments of great humour along with a sprinkling of Confucian quotes. This trilogy will resonate with those from an immigrant background or those who struggle against traditional beliefs or those who have difficulty communicating with their loved ones or those who are parents or those who have been children. In essence, it will resonate with all of us.

    THE ANG LEE TRILOGY is available to own in a 3-disc set on 24 August 2015, RRP £34.99.