Stick to my top dating tips, and you’ll find yourself bagging this season’s must have accessory…the summer boyfriend!
Here are five things you need to do to make sure your first date goes so well that you’ll be planning your second!
It’s important that you both have a get-out clause – and just-drinks can be the perfect way to make sure you’re not locked into an entire evening – or hours of company, when you know there’s just no spark. Writing for THEGAYUK.com columnist Thabian Sutherland said, “Never meet for dinner on the first date – drinks only. If you’re staring into the eyes of Ryan Gosling and your sides hurt from his witty repartee – great, go and fill ya Paul Smith dip-dyed black-leather Claude-boots. You don’t want to be stuck in a situation where your date is as scintillating as Lewis Hamilton and you have to painfully watch him devour a couple of courses before you can scarper. Buy a round each, then off you toddle”
Getting to know your new date is one of the most exciting things – and you might want to get some important compatibility issues sorted right upfront… But be careful how you phrase your questions. What you’re both into sexually is an important subject – and perhaps something you can discuss in your first meeting. Don’t let it be the first thing you lead with – but a simple, “so what are you into” at an appropriate moment could be a good starter to find out whether you’re both sexually compatible.
However, writer Dan Coleburn suggests that you don’t ask all the burning questions! He said, “Top or bottom? STD Free? Much like the politics, you have more than enough time to find out these things about one another. While the answers might sway you one way or another – I’m not going to judge what’s important to you – those issues can definitely wait a few dates”.
Of course, a new person to share your thoughts and witty stories with is wonderful, but don’t forget to ask him a few questions about his life. Listen carefully and take mental notes. Maybe even follow up on some of the most interesting stories. Ask open questions, rather than simple yes or no questions. Questions that start with “why”, “how” and “what” are perfect openers… Guys love it when you remember something they tell you from your first ever date and drop it into the conversation. It shows you were listening!
I mean why would you… Of course, you should let someone know where you’re going and what time you expect to be back, but don’t take someone along with you. Writer Lewis Fellows shared with us, “THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENS. Don’t do it. This isn’t a sort of gay Sex and the City and chances are it’s not going to work… at all. I can imagine nothing worse than trying to impress a group of people that are almost always going to be against you. (Nobody is good enough for THEIR friend)”
It’s so important to make a great first impression. Dan Coleburn tells us, “Put away that ancient Tee and actually button up to be remembered. The right guy’s going to be worth that extra effort. Iron that shirt, polish the shoes, and don’t forget to run a brush through that hair, it’ll be worth it in the long run.”
Dig deep into your Facebook tagged photos and find a nice when in the sun with a cocktail and a decent backdrop. If you’re stuck for choice, perhaps do what every other Grindr user does and take a selfie in the mirror of your local gym changing room. That way, at least everyone knows you keep fit.
Striking up a conversation via a picture of your penis is like Victoria Beckham singing – sin against nature. Sending a blurry photo of your willy is not going to make anyone think “Let’s go Prezzo”. If you, for whatever reason, have an urgent need to send one, do it after at least a day of conversation and, as with your profile picture, make sure it is the best it could be. I’m talking about the right angle and the right filter – no one wants a photo with dodgy lighting.
“Hello, how are you?” sounds far better than “hey, u alrite?” so make sure to use your best grammar when trying to secure a date or even a bit of fun. No one is going to be enticed to have sex with you when you chat like a 14-year-old on MSN.
“I like my men to be men”; “straight acting guys only; “if I can’t see your eyebrows then I don’t want to see you”. When devising your bio, try not to come across as a wanker. Some gay men decide to be their own enemy and it doesn’t exactly scream, “date me”.
Let’s be honest – most gay dating apps amount to anonymous sex with someone you’ve never met before and don’t really know much about except for the size of their penis so, let’s be clear, condoms, PrEP and regular testing if you’re sexually active are absolutely essential…
This article was first published in August 2015 and has been updated.
According to studies, it has been found that the size of British penises falls within the average range.
A comprehensive analysis conducted by Mandatory.com collected data on erect penis sizes from 80 countries worldwide and created a chart displaying the results.
The United Kingdom’s placement on the chart reveals that its average size is precisely in the middle. It doesn’t reach the larger sizes represented by the green column, nor does it fall into the smaller sizes represented by the yellow column. Instead, it lands in the orange column, indicating an average size.
Comparatively, the country with the longest average erect penises is reported to be the Democratic Republic of the Congo, measuring approximately 7.1 inches. On the other end of the spectrum, North Korea has the smallest average size, with around 3.8 inches.
Taking the average of all countries, the global average erect penis size is approximately 5.5 inches.
Guys in the United Kingdom matches this average, surpassing countries such as the United States (5.1 inches) and China (4.3 inches), but sharing the same average size as New Zealand, Ukraine, and Canada.
Mandatory.com suggests that the correct way to measure penis length is from the tip of the penis to the very bottom of the pubic bone. Interestingly, only a small percentage (approximately 3%) of men worldwide have a penis measuring over 8 inches in length. For a detailed demonstration of the correct measuring technique, you can refer to a video by David Wavey that provides precise instructions.
As we head into Valentine’s day, are any of these tell signs that your partner is cheating on you? Is Your Partner Cheating On You Using Tech? 5 Red Flags To Watch For This Valentine’s Day
Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, and many people are looking forward to a day filled with romance. But what do you do if you suspect your loved one is being unfaithful?
Trevor Cooke, the online privacy expert at EarthWeb, discusses 5 tech-related signs that your fears could be justified.
Is your partner being overly protective of their phone, for example, turning away or hiding their screen when texting or receiving push notifications? Are they leaving the room to take calls? Or maybe they’ve recently bought a privacy screen protector? These behaviours might suggest they’re communicating with someone they don’t want you to know about.
If your loved one is adding new passwords or fingerprint locks on their phone, this could be concerning. Of course, due to the risk of crime, privacy is essential, and most people will password-protect their phone. However, drastic changes in phone security without a clear reason – for example, changing their phone password without telling you when they’ve been happy to let you know it before – might indicate your partner is hiding something.
Does your partner regularly remove their browser history or use incognito modes (private windows)? You may even be told they’re planning a Valentine’s Day surprise! However, this can be a sign your partner is visiting websites they want to keep hidden (e.g. dating sites or communication platforms).
Online documents with innocent names – for example, ‘Work To Do List’ – are often the perfect way to hide things. A Microsoft 365 file or Google document could contain exactly what it says – or it could be full of hidden photos and videos they don’t want you to find.
A partner may suddenly start spending more time online, perhaps late at night or during unusual hours. If so, they may be engaging in activities or conversations they’re trying to keep secret.
If they suddenly have new friends or followers on social media that seem out of place, or they’re having frequent interactions with a specific individual, this could be a cause for concern.
Trevor says, ‘There are many ways people can hide things, whether it’s using OurSecret software or tucking them away on Amazon Prime. The key thing is to not be paranoid and to gently address any concerns. Then you can enjoy Valentine’s Day without having unnecessary worries.’
The Double Stuff is where the Btm lies on top, face down on Top 1 who enters the ass first, then from behind, kneeling between Top 1 and the Btm’s legs, Top 2 then inserts his dick.
Slowly!
In this position, Top 2 mostly controls the action.
If Top 1 or the btm moves too much, both Tops will most likely fall out.
For this position whichever Top has the largest penis should be on the bottom and enter first. It’s very likely that one or both of the tops will fall out. If this happens, don’t stress, take your time and have fun with it and enjoy the deep stretch sensations.
Lube is always important when engaging in anal sex. Contrary to some belief, bottoms cannot self-lubricate enough for prolonged penetration and spit, just won’t cut it. So invest in some high-quality lube that can go the distance. I’ve found that hybrid or silicone lubes are the best lubes for DP and longer sessions. Check out THEGAYSHOP for the best deals on hybrid lubes and silicone lube.
The warm-up starts long before your tops arrive. It all starts with the douche and getting yourself ready down there.
I’d always recommend a shower douche if you’re going for DP, or extended arse play. Usually, a normal bulb douche would be fine for anal sex, but you want to be sure. Want to know more about douching click here.
Haven’t got a shower douche or bulb douche, check out our range.
Make sure the water is lukewarm and that the pressure from your shower is low. Take your time with the experience.
Once you’re ready and cleaned out, start prepping your hole with lube and maybe a dildo or prostate massager. I start with a numbing lube.
A lube launcher is a perfect way to get the lube deep inside you, or you can coat the top of your dildo with lube and work it into your body.
When you’re getting down to it… hopefully, your tops have been true gents and gotten you all open and ready with rimming, possibly some fingering and now the penetration or maybe even some toy play to get you nicely opened up.
It’s up to you, but I’d let both of them have sex with you for as long as they want… (and feels comfortable for you) this means that when it comes to the DP your butt hole muscle will be relaxed and ready for something bigger.
| Grade | Top | Bottom |
| The View | 🍆🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑 |
| The Feeling | 🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑 |
| Position Ease | 🍆🍆🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑🍑 |
| Intimacy | 🍆🍆🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑 |
Now this position requires quite a bit of flexibility from all concerned but has 10/10 marks for views for all and well, just the feeling of achievement alone. It’s almost the exact reverse of the King of Clubs DP.
The Btm lays on his back, with his butt in the air and his legs towards his chest or shoulders. Both Tops face away from each other, butts touching, whilst squatting over the Btm and straddling one of the Btm’s legs, creating a crisscross or the look of frog’s legs. Then pointing their dick’s down, enter the Btm.
The fun thing about this position is that both Tops can control the thrust and slipping out is less of an issue.
This position needs the Tops to have some flexibility in their dicks to be able to bend downwards. The Btm’s back can be supported with a pillow under his lower back or butt.
Lube is always important when engaging in anal sex. Contrary to some belief, bottoms cannot self-lubricate enough for prolonged penetration and spit, just won’t cut it. So invest in some high-quality lube that can go the distance. I’ve found that hybrid or silicone lubes are the best lubes for DP and longer sessions. Check out THEGAYSHOP for the best deals on hybrid lubes and silicone lube.
The warm-up starts long before your tops arrive. It all starts with the douche and getting yourself ready down there.
I’d always recommend a shower douche if you’re going for DP, or extended arse play. Usually, a normal bulb douche would be fine for anal sex, but you want to be sure. Want to know more about douching click here.
Haven’t got a shower douche or bulb douche, check out our range.
Make sure the water is lukewarm and that the pressure from your shower is low. Take your time with the experience.
Once you’re ready and cleaned out, start prepping your hole with lube and maybe a dildo or prostate massager. I start with a numbing lube.
A lube launcher is a perfect way to get the lube deep inside you, or you can coat the top of your dildo with lube and work it into your body.
When you’re getting down to it… hopefully, your tops have been true gents and gotten you all open and ready with rimming, possibly some fingering and now the penetration or maybe even some toy play to get you nicely opened up.
It’s up to you, but I’d let both of them have sex with you for as long as they want… (and feels comfortable for you) this means that when it comes to the DP your butt hole muscle will be relaxed and ready for something bigger.
| Grade | Top | Bottom |
| The View | 🍆🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑 |
| The Feeling | 🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑 |
| Position Ease | 🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑🍑 |
| Intimacy | 🍆🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑 |
This legendary topsy-turvy type of titillation, in which both lucky lovers get a mouthful of man, can be a tad tricksy – especially if you’re not the same height – but it’s worth persevering with because mirror, mirror, on the wall, which position is the fairest of them all? Why, 69 every time, my dear: it’s the very definition of “mutually beneficial”.
Laying side by side can be more cosy than one gent clambering on top of the other, his crotch hovering over his partner’s face and dunking into his mouth like a Rich Tea Finger into a mug of char – although some find that kind of intensity to be precisely their cup of tea.
If you find giving oral a challenge, try sipping orange juice beforehand; it can help suppress the gag reflex. Resist adding vodka and turning it into a Harvey Wallbanger, though, however apt the name: alcohol dries and tightens the throat, which does not a brilliant blow job make.
| Grade | Top | Bottom |
| The View | 🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑 |
| The Feeling | 🍆🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑 |
| Position Ease | 🍆🍆🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑🍑 |
| Intimacy | 🍆🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑 |
Doing it doggy style: the only time two gay blokes will have a Lassie in the bedroom. 😉
You’d be barking mad not to love this iconic position. For a start, it offers fantastic visuals for the top: their lover on all fours, beautiful botty in the air, presented for him to appreciate…mmmm-mm!
Doggy also allows for easy, comfortable entry for both parties: the receiver can spread their legs as wide as they need to, and the giver is able to clearly see what they’re doing as they ease themselves inside. That might sound obvious, but if you’ve even had a lover accidentally (and painfully) bend your wang while trying to lower themselves onto it and missing, or you’ve been prodded and poked by your partner’s peen as they try and fail to hit the target, you’ll know how much of a relief a simple, easy access position can be for both of you, especially to get things going at the beginning of a session.
While Missionary brings lovers face to face, Doggy turns them away from each other – yet this too has its bonuses (bone-uses?!). Neither of you has to worry that your sex face looks like Deirdre Barlow opening a shocking phone bill. And if you feel like grunting, moaning, or coming out with some dirty talk filthier than a chimney sweep’s flannel, it’s a lot easier to let go when you don’t feel like you’re being watched.
Doin’ it Doggy means the bottom can touch themselves during intercourse – or reach through their legs and fondle their lover’s balls if they’re feeling more generous!
The missionary has an unfair reputation for being boring; the beige of bonking. Yet in reality, this traditional, no-frills-just-basic-skills position can result in a gorgeously intimate, loving experience. It allows both partners to look into each other’s eyes; share smiles as they move together; kiss and hold each other during intercourse, and enjoy maximum skin-on-skin body contact.
It may be plain, but Missionary can also be just plain lovely.
In addition, it’s a really good position to opt for if one or both of you are new to penetrative sex, or you’re just beginning a physical relationship with each other.
Why? Because being face-to-face like this facilitates clear communication. Each of you can easily see your partner’s expressions, so you can quickly tell if they look uncomfortable and perhaps need to slow things down (or, conversely, if they’re feeling more fabulous than a drag queen’s sequin frock collection and would defy Cher and turn back time if it meant they could savour this delicious sex session all over again!).
Missionary is not a position made for jackhammer banging; it lends itself to gentle thrusting and caring, trusting lovemaking.
Want the closeness of Missionary but fancy spicing things up with some extra sensation? Try using lube not only in the anal and genital areas but also up over your stomachs and chests, so that you slip-slide against each other smoothly as you move.
| Grade | Top | Bottom |
| The View | 🍆🍆🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑🍑 |
| The Feeling | 🍆🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑 |
| Position Ease | 🍆🍆🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑🍑 |
| Intimacy | 🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑 |
This is a sex position that involves anal sex and requires both a bottom and a top.
Have your partner recline flat on his back, legs together, and arms resting by his sides.
The bottom should astride the top, on his knees, facing away as though he’s about to do the reverse cowboy, and lower himself onto the top’s penis or strap-on dildo.
Once the bottom has fully accommodated the top, he should gently lay back, maybe using his arms to take some of his weight. Eventually, you should be able to lie flat on top of the top. You should try and get your limbs aligned. Ultimately the easiest way to think of this position is hugging your bottom from behind, but lying down.
A word to the wise, if you’re not both weight matched and your bottom is heavier than your top, you may need to use your arms to support his weight.
Basically at this point both bodies should be alligned together looking sort of like a snake(!) but of course not really.
This position is great for tight spaces and for an unexperienced bottom to control the top’s movement and thrusting power.
Tops beware that your penis might need to bend slightly to accommodate this position.
You and your partner are intimately connected, with so much skin to skin connection. The bottom has a lot more control in this position, so if you’re a top who likes to be dominated then this is the position for you.
However some couples might find that there is a bit of a disconnect between the two of you, because there’s no eye contact.
This position is also great if you’re both of different heights. It really doesn’t matter if your top is tall or short as there’s no standing! Win-win!
| Grade | Top | Bottom |
| The View | 🍆 | 🍑 |
| The Feeling | 🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑🍑 |
| Position Ease | 🍆🍆 | 🍑🍑 |
| Intimacy | 🍆 | 🍑 |