THEGAYUK

Day: 18 September 2019

  • 10 annoying questions people ask about gay weddings (and equally annoying ways to answer them)

    Which one is the bride?

    gay men getting married
    CREDIT: dolgachov bigstock

    Now don’t get me wrong, I know a lot of folks are innocently curious. But when you’re trying to plan your big day, which to you just feels like any other big day out there, the often repetitive questions from enquiring minds can become just a trifle irritating.

    And by the way, I haven’t made any of these up – I was asked all of them at least once in the run up to my wedding.

    And by the way again, I know number 9 isn’t a question, but it felt worthy of inclusion.

    1. So which of you is like the bride?

    via GIPHY

    Neither, sorry to disappoint your hetero-normative ideals but that’s sort of the point of the whole thing.

    1. Will you both wear suits?

    via GIPHY

    Nah, he’s got a suit and I’ve dug out my fancy dress costume of a bag of chips from last Halloween to wear.

    1. How are you going to walk down the aisle?

    via GIPHY

    One foot in front of the other, presumably. Or maybe we’ll do the conga. Or the cha-cha slide. Everybody clap your hands!

    1. What will you do about names?

    via GIPHY

    Use them.

    1. Are you going to have a hen do, or a stag do? Or do you call it a hag do?

    via GIPHY

    What I’m going to have, my dear, is a piss up. You may call it what you like.

    1. I’ve got a friend, he’s gay, and he got married. At his wedding he *insert tedious wedding activity here*. Are you going to do that?

    via GIPHY

    Yes, yes – I think I saw him at the club meetings, he told me all about it. Now don’t get me wrong, I do love the idea of a bucking-bronco in the shape of a glittery aubergine, but it’s not quite the direction we’re going to go in.

    1. Are you having a bridesmaid? Or a best man?

    via GIPHY

    Neither. I’m having a cat, wrapped in taffeta with a cherry bakewell tied to the top of its head.

    1. Do you still have someone give you away?

    via GIPHY

    Good grief no, I’m far too expensive. I’m being bought, thank you very much.

    1. At least you don’t have to worry about getting unexpectedly pregnant on your wedding night!

    via GIPHY

    No, that’s true – just the knowledge that there’s still a large chunk of the world who would happily see me executed for being who I am is worry enough. Thank you for giving me some perspective.

    And then afterwards to finish off:

    1. Did you know that was the first gay wedding I’ve ever been to? It was much more fun than a normal wedding!

    via GIPHY

    Yes, I agree. It really knocked spots off of that boring one I went to last year, with all the shabby-chic birdcages, hilari-not speeches and tawdry wedding tat … oh wait, that was yours wasn’t it?

  • COMMENT | You need to start paying for your porn

    Here in the UK, we take a lot of content for granted. It’s not our fault, most of us have been brought up on a diet of free, advert-free, tv, radio and news, thanks to the BBC. But we have to change this.

    CREDIT: ©-lofilolo-Depositphotos

    As one wise puppet once said, “The internet is for porn” and he was right, it’s everywhere. It’s all over social media and there are millions of sites across the web, devoted to one of the nation’s favourite pastimes. Porn. But what is keeping this industry afloat?

    There was a time when if you wanted to look at nude people doing it, (and you weren’t able to tune into Eurotrash on Channel 4) you’d have to buy a magazine, then there was the birth of the VHS and then the DVD, which revolutionised the industry and made it very successful, but like the music and magazine industry, porn’s physical products have been supplanted by the digital revolution. An entity that has turned all our passions, from music to film into bytes that no one has really managed to monetise successfully, when compared to the physical product world.

    Getting access to porn is ridiculously easy and for the most part free to view and for most of us is as easy as logging on to social media.

    There are plenty of free sites that offer HD videos of people going at it – and that’s great but when the end user isn’t paying for it, what happens to the creators of the content we enjoy?

    People need to be paid for their performances. Editors need to be paid for their art, the photographers, the directors and all the people involved need to earn their living – and if that happens to be inside the porn industry, we should be supporting that.

    For something that is pretty much in all our lives is it too much to ask that you set aside £10 a month for a subscription of your favourite studio or even star on their own OnlyFans channel?

  • REVIEWED | Queeriosity Manchester

    REVIEWED | Queeriosity Manchester

    ★★★★ | There’s a new show in town and it’s queer and curious.

    I was excited to go along to a brand new cabaret in Manchester on Saturday night, Queeriosity. It’s going to be held weekly every Saturday at Void/Kiki in Canal Street, Manchester and what’s even better is it’s free entry.

     

    It was the first show on Saturday 14th of September, and I must say I was suitably impressed by what was on offer. I was lucky enough to speak to creator of the show Donna Trump to ask what inspired her to bring this new show to Manchester and she told me “Yes it’s something new and different but you know, it’s something not to be missed. I want to unearth the world of cabaret as it’s known in Manchester. Give everyone a taste of something different. We have great cabaret in Manchester already existing and I just want to show people another wonderful side of it too” and show it they did.

    There’s going to be rotating cast and guest performers so each show will be something new and different, with new performances every week with at least 4 performers every week. And if week one is anything to go by, these performers will give it their all to entertain people. All the artists on stage gave it 110% and I could tell all of them really enjoyed what they were doing. But it really wasn’t a standard drag queen show. There was spoken word comedy lipsync, high energy burlesque style and a drag king lipsynching to Hercules songs. I laughed, I cheered and I came away very happy. I have very high hopes that this show will be something amazing. What seems to set this aside is that this is a passion project of Donna and the artists involved and one feels that having a new show like this could certainly help revive the scene in Canal Street. The other great thing is that people are utterly free to come as they feel comfortable. I saw, drag kings and queens, genderfluid people, pups, and every other kind of LGBTQ+ & ally person there and no one gave two hoots as long as you were having a good time. It felt like a very welcoming and safe environment to just kick back and enjoy.

    The whole show felt fresh and fun and everyone watching on Saturday really got into it, and seeing the reaction of Donna to the cheers she got at the end shows just how invested she is in this cabaret. I wish her all the luck in taking this forward and I cannot wait to see what she and the other performers come up with next

    So if you find yourself in Canal Street on a Saturday night, I would highly recommend a visit to see Queeriosity, the new curious cabaret.

    Social Media is linked below.

    Queeriosity

    Donna Trump

    Coco DeVille

    Cherry Valentine

    Christian Gay

    The Vicars Daughter

    Ellen DeGenerate

    Julie Noted

  • CAR REVIEW | Mercedes E220d convertible AMG line

    CAR REVIEW | Mercedes E220d convertible AMG line

    ★★★★★ | Mercedes E220d convertible AMG

    Mercedes are masters at creating luxurious and stylish convertibles. They have a long and distinguished history of making beautiful and timeless convertible cars.

    One of their latest is the E Class convertible. We were fortunate to have been given an E220d AMG line recently for a week of effortless and stylish cruising in the lap of luxury.

    Mercedes currently offer 3 convertible models. The C class, E Class and S class. The E Class sits right in the middle with a starting price of £45,960.

    Our test car was the E220 convertible diesel, which means it was powered by a 2.0-litre diesel engine producing 194 hp and 400 Nm. 0-62 mph takes 7.7 seconds and the combined mpg is quoted as 57.7 mpg. I wouldn’t dispute this, it was great on fuel, particularly at motorway speeds. For the company car users, the E220d emits 126 g/km of CO2.

    A modern Mercedes is a very nice place to be and with ours being the AMG line with a few of the optional packages ticked; Premium package, parking package, driving assistance package, night package.

    It was very well equipped and particularly well appointed car. 

    Premium package includes; memory package (Memory package allows the driver’s seat, front passenger seat, steering column and exterior mirrors to all be electrically adjusted & stored), parking package (searches for a suitable parking space for you and then helps you with accurate parking) including 360° camera, comand online (media interface, widescreen 12.3-inch cockpit display and touchpad), multibeam led intelligent Light System (To ensure the best possible vision, the LED Intelligent Light System adapts automatically to the prevailing weather, light and driving conditions) and wireless charging. 


    We also had the benefit of the driving assistance package, including: active brake assist, active distance assist distronic, active speed limit assist, active lane keeping assist, evasive steering assist and pre-safe plus (initiates occupant protection measures if a rear-end collision is imminent).

    Our car was the AMG line and in addition to the AMG bodystyling had the night package, which included: 20-inch multi-spoke alloy wheels painted high-gloss black with high sheen finish, diamond radiator grille with integral, Mercedes‑Benz star and a single louvre and some high-gloss black exterior highlights. 


    A really neat feature of the E220d Cabriolet AMG line is the way the multi-layer acoustic fabric roof can be folded down on the move. It can be operated at speeds up to 31 mph and opened or 

    closed in just 20 seconds. It’s great if you’re in traffic and the weather takes a turn for the worst.

    Mercedes airscarf neck-level heating and aircap are standard on this car and another welcome feature for when the sun doesn’t have his hat on. 

    How does it drive? 

    There are a few engine options across the range; In the diesels the E220 that we had, had the 1,950cc, 4-cylinder diesel which produces 194hp/143kW. There’s also a 2,987cc, 6-cylinder diesel producing 340hp/250kW in the E400

    In petrol form there’s a 1,991cc, 4-cylinder petrol engine producing 245hp/180kW in the E300 or 299hp/220kW with EQ Boost of 14hp/10kW in the E350, and a 2,996cc, 6-cylinder petrol producing 367hp/270kW in the E450. If this doesn’t quench your thirst for power, there’s a 2,999cc, 6-cylinder petrol, 435hp/320kW with EQ Boost of 22hp/16kW in the AMG E53 4MATIC+.

    Our test car also had the the excellent 9G-TRONIC PLUS 9-speed automatic gearbox which was great, particularly when cruising and so smooth.

    Mercedes make beautiful cars with stunning interiors and this is no exception. Our AMG line car had a black artico leather/dinamica microfibre upholstery and black open-pore ash wood trim on dashboard and centre console. Brushed aluminium highlights and accents such as the air vent nozzles, door handles and seat controls.

    Ride and handling are superb as you would expect. The AMG line has AMG ride control sports suspension, based on air body control air suspension. The multi-chamber air suspension system with a sporty spring/damper set-up continuously adjusts damping to ensure excellent driving dynamics and a high level of ride comfort. 

    In combination with AMG dynamic select, three pre-set modes (Comfort, Sport and Sport+) are available to deliver a tailored driving experience. 

    In summary, the E220d convertible is a beautiful, stylish and very well engineered car. It’s great to drive, looks amazing and is a practical 4 seat car with the added bonus of being a stunning convertible when you want it to be.

    Prices for the E class convertible start at £45,960.00