THEGAYUK

Tag: Film Review

All the latest film reviews for LGBT themed films and others.

  • Film Review | Theo & Hugo – sexually charged and romantic

    ★★★★ | Theo & Hugo

    Two men meet at one of Paris’ most popular, and notorious, gay sex clubs, and then embark on an evening with lots of twist and turns, in the new film Theo & Hugo.

    You might think you’re watching a gay porn film as the first 20 minutes of Theo & Hugo is full-on man-to-man action – erections and anal sex are all on full display, filmed at L’Impact – a naked gay sex club in the Marais district in Paris. Theo & Hugo, In French, with English subtitles, is shot in real-time, and it’s in that club where Theo and Hugo meet, at exactly 4:27 a.m., amongst the writhing and moaning group of men who are all enjoying each others’ company.

    While there, Theo and Hugo connect sexually, intimately, and emotionally. They then decide to leave the club together to carry on their night with each other. But what wasn’t discussed while they were having unsafe sex at the club was the use of a condom to prevent HIV transmission, as Hugo (Francois Nambot) tells Theo (Geoffrey Couët) that he is HIV+.

    What transpires after is a rollercoaster of a night for both of them, when Theo goes to the hospital to get PEP (Post-exposure prophylaxis), a medication that should kill any traces of the virus that might be in his system.

    Romantically, and responsibly, Hugo joins him there. They then wander the streets of Paris, on a night that could turn out to be either very romantic or very tragic, with the ramifications of HIV staring them right in the face, and the possibility that their encounter could be more than just an encounter.

    Is Theo & Hugo a porn film or is it a film with an important message? This is something that you will have to decide, but nonetheless, it’s guerrilla and gay filmmaking at its finest. And Kudos go to the actors for ‘baring it all’ in scenes that are relevant to the message of the film, and to writers and directors Olivier Ducastel and Jacques Martineau for bravely, and successfully, having the balls to make this controversial, yet romantic and engaging film.

  • FILM REVIEW | Mechanic Resurrection

    MECHANIC RESURRECTION – The sexiest man alive is back in the sequel to his 2011 actioner which itself came from the 1972 original- testosterone level turned up to 11.

    Nutshell – Jason Statham returns to one of his many movie franchises. Retired and in hiding (so far so Jason Bourne) he is forced to travel the world to commit three impossible assassinations to rescue the love of his life (shame it is not a guy – surely this guy must be in the closet). From Rio to Thailand to Sydney and beyond mayhem and incredible stunts is the the ultimate outcome.

    Running Time – 98 minutes; Certificate – 15.

    Tagline – “Four Continents, Three Kills; They Hired Him, They Betrayed Him, They Will Pay”.

    The Gay UK Factor – The Stath gets his shirt off in all his films but here he goes mad. Basically there are very few scenes here where he actually has his clothes on so not so much a movie for your wank bank as a movie that will entirely destroy your right arm. Jason turns up as a prisoner, security guard, repairman, soldier, in a suit, swimming trunks etc etc in a 2016 version of the Village People with added chest hair.

    Cast – Jason Statham, Jessica Alba, Tommy Lee Jones, Michelle Yeoh and a endless line of muscle hunks to get sweaty with in mano et mano action for the whole duration.

    Key Player – These movies are star vehicles, basically if Jason wasn’t in it then it would simply not be made and here he has one of his biggest budgets ever in a film which is wholly tailored to his strengths – number one of which is his huge schlong – clearly visible on the beach and in the underwater scenes – then of course there are the gratuitous lingering ass shots.

    Budget – $40 Million, These films never make their money back at cinemas but from DVD and TV and this bigger production than normal will be no different.

    Best Bit – 0.20 mins; Where you get the start of 15 straight minutes of the Sath’s nipples on a Phuket beach.

    Worst Bit – 1.32 mins; The big surprise twist or reveal at the end is pretty pathetic and a real let down – let’s just say this is no Usual Suspects or Sixth Sense knock out blow – he should have got his prick out instead now that would have been a closer.

    Little Secret – If you are ever in LA, Jason works out quietly and sweats like mad at the Gold’s Gym right by LAX airport so make sure you make that your gym of choice for your trip and join the queue to see him naked and soaped up in the open showers.

    Movie Mistake – The watch which is so key to the story is missing from Jason’s wrists in thousands of scenes throughout the film – very strange for such an important macguffin. Hey Ho this is his application for the part of Bond with two sequences even filmed in former Bond famous locations.

    Further Viewing – Seeing as Jason holds the world record for the most number of Movie franchises ever with eight you are spoiled for choice. Try Spy, The Transporter 2, Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, The Expendables 3, Crank 2 and Fast & Furious 7 or any film with a number in it.

    Any Good – As Formulaic as ever with the only new thing here being the huge globetrotting going on (the location scout deserves a pay rise) and of course the increased Statham flesh count. A movie for straight guys to live out and hide their gay fantasies and for gay guys to freeze frame for years to come.

    Rating – 74%

  • FILM REVIEW | Chicklit – a film about Mommy Porn and BDSM!

    FILM REVIEW | Chicklit – a film about Mommy Porn and BDSM!

    ★★★★ | Chicklit

    Four men try to cash in on the Fifty Shades of Grey phenomenon by writing their own racy novel in order to save a local pub in the new film Chicklit.

    Chicklit
    SWCP

    Set in a small village in Norfolk, the whole town seems to be reading She Came in Chains, a new BDSM book by author Lady Lovelorn, including local newspaper editor David Rose’s (Christian McKay) wife Jen (Caroline Catz).

    So when the local pub is faced with closing unless a buyer can come up with £300,000 to save it, Rose has an idea – why don’t him and his pals write their own racy novel. So he enlists his card game buddies – pub manager Chris (Tom Palmer), school teacher Justin (David Troughton) and local bookstore owner Marcus (Miles Jupp – who owns the bookstore with his partner Geoffrey – James Wilby), to each write their own section of a ‘mommy porn’ novel in the hopes that they can get someone to publish it.

    Well, David contacts London book agents Bonar and Law (John Hurt and Eileen Atkins), who are very interested in representing the book the men have called Love Let Her. They get a publishing deal but with one caveat, they need to have the author available to do book tours and signings. So David enlists his struggling actress sister-in-law Zoe (Dakota Blue Richards) to play the part of the ‘author’ of the book. But with the book becoming a success, it’s harder and harder for them to keep the book’s real authors a secret, and even more so when Zoe starts getting tired of promoting something that is not hers.

    Ii is a cute and funny take on chick literature and how almost anyone with an imagination and a computer can write a saucy novel. Filmed like a 1970’s style television show in a small English village with typical local characters, it’s a film that’s both charming and cute. Hurt and Atkins almost steal the movie as the uproarious book agents while the delightful music of Alex Britten (related to Director Tony Brtten who also wrote the film with Oliver Britten – it’s a family affair), who sings as part of the pub’s house band, adds a nice touch. This film is recommended because it’s cute and doesn’t take itself too seriously.

     

  • FILM REVIEW | Golden Years

    FILM REVIEW | Golden Years

    ★★★★ | Golden Years

    Golden Years
    PR Provided

    The pensioners in the new DVD release ‘Golden Years’ try to get even at the system that they feel is robbing them.

    It’s a cute and funny film about older people trying to get back what’s theirs. They feel the system is corrupt, so they take matters into their own hands. Retired couple Arthur Goode (Bernard Hill) and his wife Martha (Virginia McKenna), who is ill with Crohn’s disease, eke out a living on their pension while spending time at their local social club with friends Royston (Simon Callow), Brian (Philip Davis), and Shirley (Una Stubbs).

    One day Arthur finds out that the company he spent a lifetime working for has gone bankrupt, and so has his pension. He doesn’t know what to do… how is going to be able to take care of Martha? An opportunity presents itself when, while in front of a bank when money is being delivered, one of the guards trips, falls and gets knocked out on the ground, while the guard inside the truck inadvertently hands over a container of money to Arthur, who gladly takes it and runs. It sets off an idea where he enlists Martha, and eventually his friends, to rob banks. Who would expect pensioners as bank robbers, with cucumbers acting as guns, of stealing money?

    Golden Years is a delightful film with a cast of great actors all relishing their role as bank robbers. It gets even funnier when the local police keep thinking that the bank robbers are a malicious and very dangerous gang.

    I would’ve liked to have seen more of Ellen Thomas, the loquacious and horny local diva, she’s got some of the best lines in the film. Some of the robberies the gang pulls off are, however, a bit unbelievable and far-fetched, especially when they’re attempt at running away is basically a slow walk. But nonetheless it’s a charming film that will make you think what retirement holds in store for you – perhaps robbing banks to get even with the system.

    GOLDEN YEARS is available on DVD from Amazon
    www.facebook.com/goldenyearsmovie @goldenyearsfilm

  • FILM REVIEW | Boys on film 15: Time and Tied

    FILM REVIEW | Boys on film 15: Time and Tied

    Peccadillo continues to champion gay short films by coming out with their 15th gay shorts compilation. This one’s titled ‘Boys on Film 15: Time and Tied’ and it showcases a selection of British short films that are either sexy, funny or meaningful or all three.

    -G_OCLOCK_1

     

    The best by far is Trouser Bar. Directed by famous gay porn director Kristen Bjorn, Trouser Bar takes us into a gay shop that sells clothes made of corduroy clothes, which gets both the staff and customers frisky. Its pulsating music and mustached actors mimic the best elements of a 1970’s gay porn film, and it builds to an exciting climax. Porn star Ashley Ryder is practically unrecognizable as one of the shops customers, with Julian Clary making a quick cameo. This is an 18-minute masterpiece.

    Crossroad doesn’t have any dialogue, but it’s a hard-hitting 11-minute short about a young man who lives with his girlfriend. He’s angry and revengeful over the black man who ran over and killed the man he was in love with. Directed by gay actor Leon Lopez. Powerful.

    Dawn introduces us to a young blind man who’s waiting at a bus stop in the middle of nowhere, and unbeknownst to him the woman he’s speaking to is transgender. They share a special moment together in this 11-minute short directed by transgender filmmaker Jake Graf.

    Sauna the Dead is a fantastic gay horror film about one man looking for love in a sauna where the patrons turn into zombies who then try to eat him and a fellow Indian customer alive. Very original and excellently shot at Chariots Vauxhall. Directed by Tom Frederic (who also stars), it’s 23 minutes of scary fun.

    G’OClock is a relevant and timely short about a chemsex party where a paramedic and a younger man re-connect from a previous encounter. Though it ends abruptly, it’s very glossy style with a very sexy cast make it’s ten minutes too short. The film includes the infectious song ‘Look at Me’ by DPSC. With Leon Lopez (again) and a bevy of real life porn stars.

    Closets (18 minutes) is a poignant and emotional story about a camp young teenage boy in 1986 who likes to dress up in his mother’s clothes. She gets angry at him so he retreats into his closet, and then comes out of the closet (no pun intended) to meet another young gay man 30 years in the future whose gay lifestyle, and dressing up, is more acceptable. This 18-minute beautiful film is directed by Lloyd Eyre-Morgan and has a fantastic performance by Tommy Knight as the 1986 gay teen.

    Putting on the Dish is basically two gay men sitting on a bench in a park talking about gay men and sex. Their accents and the too short story make it a bit hard to understand and pretty much irrelevant.

    The above is just a taster of all the short films that are featured in this two hour compilation that’s all about showcasing some of the UK’s best emerging talent. Tie yourself to your DVD player and make this a much watch!

    BOYS ON FILM 15: TIME AND TIED

    Available to purchase on AMAZON

  • FILM REVIEW | Suicide Squad

    SUICIDE SQUAD – A team of badguys are moulded into the ultimate bad-ass superhero team in DC Comics keystone answer to the Avengers.

    Nutshell – The US Government decide that the best way to deal with any future superhero nasty fukkas from outer space is to form there own band of super villains and blackmail them into action. First job to save the world from a real bitch on heat, roll into the mix of all the future household names we get appearances from Batman, Superman, the Joker and other comic faves.

    Running Time – 123 minutes; Certificate – 15.

    Tagline – ‘Worst Heroes Ever’ ‘Justice Has A Bad Side’.

    The Gay UK Factor – There is some serious machismo going on here for two guys that have testosterone coming out of every part of their pecs and glutes. Joel Kinnaman uniformed throughout in military fatigues as Rick Flag the military officer put in charge of the squad is matched by squad member Aussie sex god Jai Courtney as Boomerang. If they f**k in the sequel then it could become the biggest film of all time.

    Cast – Will Smith, Jared Leto, Margot Robbie, Viola Davis, Jai Courtney and most notably the world’s leading supermodel Cara Delevingne plus celeb cameos.

    Key Player – Mr Summer Blockbuster himself the most bankable star in Hollywood a certain Will Smith. He gets some genuinely funny lines and just looks and feels like a superhero with his new shaved head putting everything to good use he learned in Hancock. There are film stars and then there is Willard Carroll ‘Will’ Smith Jnr.

    Budget – $175 Million which was money well spent as already made quarter of a billion back at the Box Office and more importantly it has many future franchises dependent on it which are all green lit now.

    Best Bit – 0.48mins; So many great little sequences and action beats but when the writing is so solid that the best sequence is the first macho posturing meet with all the great word play when the squad meet their military bosses.

    Worst Bit – 1.25 mins; The elephant in the room here is does this film need the Jokers involvement? With so many previous great screen appearances it is hard to get Heath Ledger and Jack Nicholson out of your mind and Jared Leto misses by a country mile. Yes he has some great Ledger type lines but he has nothing really to do with the plot here.

    Little Secret – Jared Leto got so immersed in playing The Joker that he sent his fellow cast members “Joker-like” presents: a live rat to Margot Robbie, bullets to Will Smith, sticky Playboy magazine to Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje and a dead pig and some anal beads and used condoms to the crew….we’ll take the anal beads thank you.

    Movie Mistake – Rick Flag’s hair length continually changes throughout the movie showing clearly the number of re-shoots that are here or maybe the director was still hoping to get his first choice Tom Hardy back from The Revenant. How does Harleyquin get into a lift, wave goodbye to the squad for them all to be waiting for her at the top when the lift doors open?

    Further Viewing – Endless Batman films, Superman films, Avengers films, Guardian films we are not short of superhero movies now or anytime in the near future judging by this, Captain America and Deadpool’s haul.

    Any Good – This is a very cool film indeed. From the opening scene to the post credit stinger, through clothing, visuals and music we are deep in indie territory here hanging with the kids in school everybody thinks are cool. Yes it is a great film, to some people it will be the movie they have waited for all their lives to others it wont even be the best superhero film of the year. We believe this is the start of something pretty big though.

    Rating – 79% ????????

     

  • FILM REVIEW | Jason Bourne

    FILM REVIEW | Jason Bourne

    JASON BOURNE – The 5th film in the saga of the memory loss super-spy and former FBI agent. Matt Damon is back after the Jeremy Renner misfire

    CREDIT: universal pictures
    CREDIT: universal pictures

    Nutshell – Picking up where the third movie left off and completely passing over number four this time coming staight out of the headlines with a massive wikileaks style hack story. Our hero gets dragged back out of hiding (again) to defeat those nasty plotting American war mongerers. This time he heads to Athens, Berlin, London Paddington and Las Vegas and the action is pretty non-stop with superstar Brit director Paul Greengrass back in charge of the mayhem (The only reason for Damon’s return)

    Time – 123 mins; Certificate – 12A.

    Tagline – ‘You Know His Name’ a play on the James Bond Casino Royale ‘You Know My Name’ tag.

    The Gay UK Factor – Don’t be late arriving as the hottest scene is right at the start when we get Matt Damon in a shirtless illegal underground fight club with plenty of sweat, muscle and blood for your right wrists attention.

    Cast – Matt Damon. Tommy Lee Jones, Alicia Vikander, Scott Sheperd, Vincent Cassel and franchise regular the truly gorgeous Julia Styles.

    Key Player – The British Superstar director Paul Greengrass who is unbeaten in making great exciting hit blockbuster movies straight out of the headlines. From Bloody Sunday to United 93, from Green Zone to Captain Phillips plus two pevious Bourne movies he is able to make the Stephen Lawrence case, 9/11, The Irish Troubles, The Somali Pirates etc into pure thought provoking entertainment and here he does it again with whistleblower Julian Assange – this movie might not be shown in the Ecuadorian Embassy!

    Budget – $120 Million but it’s already made $160 Million with a lot of legs left in it yet – a bona fide deserved hit where Hollywood does what it is best at and that is simply repeat what has worked before ad-infintum. Matt Damon is awaiting the phone to ring for number six surely.

    Best Bit – 0.36mins; There is a stunt in the final sequence which could go straight up against the opening chase in TMNTurtles as the best action clip of the year. As we are not into spoilers then the second best bit is a very tense possible death scene of a major character at the end of the Athens chase.

    Worst Bit – 1.02 mins; The upside of Bourne films is their realism but the problem with this is that we often expect a lot more than real life from our Hollywood entertainment. The bad guy here and the threat factor is not that huge in an era where we are used to world threatening bond villains or nasty geezers out to blow up the world – computer threat of secrets from a guy in a suit is a bit passe.

    Little Secret – The Las Vegas car chase sequence took five weeks to shoot and at the end the sequence wrecked 170 cars – They were only allowed to film on the strip between midnight and 5AM. They could not film the Greek scenes there as the taxes were too high due to that country’s financial woes so they mocked up Tenerife to look like Athens instead.

    Movie Mistake – A lot of car trouble, a number of times in the Las Vegas car chase you can see no driver in the vehicles, during a huge crash no airbags are deployed and four times the vehicles pass Bally’s and Paris Casinos on the strip which probably shows us how little access they actually had over the busy Vegas streets. Also why no-one noticed that the Audi Bourne hires in London has the steering wheel on the left side we will never know.

    Further Viewing – Four Bourne films and 25 Bond movies to begin with. Also Kingsman, The Ipcress File, Bridge Of Spies, Mission Impossible, Spy Game, The Third Man, 24 and Spooks.

    Any Good – Yes this is ace and worthy of the original trio that went before it. The action is spot on and the directing is out of this world. Matt Damon looks great and has this character locked down now. The others have great sequences but this is probably the best all round movie of the franchise.

    Rating – 70%

     

     

  • FILM REVIEW | Star Trek Beyond

    STAR TREK BEYOND – The 13th Star Trek film – remember the odd-numbered ones are the good ones does that all change here?

    Nutshell – The third movie in the rebooted series. The crew set off from the best spaceport in the Universe to help a missing crippled ship in a nebula hence out of contact. They come under attack from a big bad guy who has been planning bigger dirty deeds from afar which soon become apparent and whilst he sets off to destroy said spaceport and all human kind, our heroes are separated, enslaved or worse on a desolate planet that looks like a quarry in Surrey (Actually Vancouver).

    Time – 122 mins; Certificate – 12A.

    Tagline – None. Let’s face it you know what you are going to get by now after 50 years and are either in or out.

    THE GAY UK FACTOR – Chris Pine and Idris Elba in mano et mano wrestling and fighting action as to who gets to live or in our universe loser gets done in the ass by the winner as in Kink.com’s wrestling videos online.

    Cast – Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto, Simon Pegg, Zoe Saldana, Karl Urban with all the regulars plus Idris Elba and Sofia Betella and a bunch or red-shirt cannon fodder.

    Key Player – Simon Pegg has now also taken on writing duties so the humour is upped substantially and it works. Of course he still plays Engineer Scotty, superbly too, and has quietly gone from BBC TV sitcom land to possibly our biggest movie star with this franchise plus two others with the Mission Impossible and Ice Age films plus his own starring comedies like Shaun Of The Dead, Hot Fuzz and Paul, where does he find the time – Nick Frost who?

    Budget – $185 Million, It’s positive reception will mean that it will turn out to be a very profitable little number especially in a Summer of underachievers yes Ghostbusters and Independence Day 2 we are looking at you.

    Best Bit – 0.31mins; The first time the bad guys attack we get a very long, tense and sustained action sequence with real threat as the Starship Enterprise gets destroyed piece by piece before your very eyes….or does it?

    Worst Bit – 1.28 mins; When Kirk goes all ‘The Great Escape’ on a vintage motorbike he finds in space….yes we know! Many critics say this is a great action movie but not a Star Trek film, judge for yourselves of course but this sequence would fit much better in Fast and Furious 8: Vin Diesel in a space quarry.

    Little Secret -Writer Simon Pegg and director Justin Lin made the decision of making Sulu gay as a nod to original actor George Takei, who has since become a prominent LGBT rights activist. After production on the film was completed and a month before the film’s release, Anton Yelchin (Chekov) was killed in a freak car accident. During the end credits, there is a caption “For Anton”.

    Movie Mistake – As the Enterprise gets hacked to pieces and split in two it seems incongruous that the lights, air, gravity seem unaffected. Then the ship starts to flip upside down but still the crew are running along floors and ceilings with gay abandon. Newton’s law of gravity for christsake!

    Further Viewing – Well you have twelve others to go at for starters our fave is number 4 The Voyage Home followed by First Contact; Stargate, Aliens, Battlestar Galactica and anything from that galaxy far away and a long long time ago.

    Any Good – Well yeah, the rebooted formula is well sorted now and the cast fit their parts perfectly. The original story is done and there is no attempts at cameos from Trek characters of the past just a straight forward adventure movie. Like a TV episode three times as long and with 50 times the budget. One of those rare Trek films that would appeal outside of the home fan-base. Number 14 please.

    Rating – 34/100 (34th out of the last 100 films reviewed with 1 being Gay UK filmatic heaven and 100 being a dud).

  • FILM REVIEW | The Legend Of Tarzan

    FILM REVIEW | The Legend Of Tarzan

    THE LEGEND OF TARZAN – The eternal story of the jungle hero brought up by apes who turns into a 6’4″ plus sweaty almost nude muscle man is back.

    Legend Of Tarzan
    CREDIT: Warner Bros

     

    Nutshell – The story has been filmed so many times over the last 98 years and here he gets his biggest budget yet in both an original story and an adventure involving diamonds and nasty Euro villains. Starting in England as the grown up suited and booted Lord Greystoke we get to flashback to the loss of his parents, the adoption by gorillas and how he met Jane before his Lordship whips his clothes off to start swinging through the jungle in the main plot for a bit of revenge, rescue the missus and to sort out some international political shenanigans and save the day. Thank goodness here he can communicate with the animals as he sure needs there help big time.

    Time – 110 mins; Certificate – 12A.

    Tagline – ‘Human…Nature’.

    THE GAY UK FACTOR – Well you have to wait 30 minutes until you get to see a nipple thereafter it is 90 minutes of rippling sweaty muscle running, jumping and wrestling with other buff men. Tarzan is played by Alexander Skarsgard the hottest piece of Swedish blonde manhood you have ever seen. If you want more check out the new gay porn parody Tarzan from Men.com starring porn superstar Diego Sans with his 10 incher stumping every man up the butt who steps into his jungle like an ape on heat and banging his chest and letting out his infamous shout when he cums the choice is yours !.

    Cast – Alexander Skarsgard (Zoolander 2), Margot Robbie (The Wolf Of Wall Street), Christoph Waltz (Spectre), Jim Broadbent (Moulin Rouge), Ben Chaplin (Cinderella) and Samuel ‘I’ve had it with these motherf***ing snakes on this motherf***ing plane’ L. Jackson.

    Key Player – Christoph Waltz is the only stand out in a sea of beige here. A great scene stealing actor ever since Tarantino launched him into the big time a decade ago and here he adds another complete bastard to his run of Nazi’s in Inglorious Bastards or his Blofeld in the latest James Bond.

    Budget – $180 Million, One of the biggest budgets of the Summer but we are looking at a merely break-even film here, so no profit, no sequel and no franchise…..oh dear!

    Best Bit – 0.50 mins; Tarzan and buds swing on vines onto a fast-moving train which is a very entertaining but unnecessary action set-piece.

    Worst Bit – 0.20 mins; Basically the whole first act is slow going, get your kit off man and fight something so we watch those muscles move and smell those pits.

    Little Secret – The 6’4″ actor had to get his bod in shape twice as the cast had to return 8 months later for re-shoots. He said, “We have an outline already for the sequel in which Tarzan gains weight. Tarzan remains hairy and does not have eight pack abs. It has no action and Tarzan eats cake, lots of cake. I wrote it.”…..no worries there is no sequel wanted here.

    Movie Mistake – The bad guys death right at the end has a couple of hideous errors check them for yourself as we are not into giving spoilers here.

    Further Viewing – The International Movie Database lists over 200 Tarzan films over the last 98 years so when done with those try The Jungle Book (2016), Fitzcarraldo, Romancing The Stone, Congo & even George Of The Jungle.

    Any Good – Not really considering that budget. There is plenty of action and a heavily CGI’d finale which hardly engages but the acting is so phoned in and the editing is appalling jumping back in time as and when and leaping the main story onwards with an unexplained blur – you will switch off before the end after all the whole cast except Waltz do. Decent wanking material though.

    Rating – 81/100 (81st out of the last 100 films reviewed with 1 being Gay UK filmatic heaven and 100 being a dud).

  • FILM REVIEW | Ghostbusters

    FILM REVIEW | Ghostbusters

    GHOSTBUSTERS – New York is flooded by angry ghosts once again – who ya gonna call ?… The all female reboot that’s who.
    The Ghostbusters Abby (Melissa McCarthy), Holtzmann (Kate

    Nutshell – Thirty-two years after you first heard that legendary song and saw that logo the female Ghostbusters take over with a mega budget and a host of famous cameos plus all the major players (in different roles) from the original films. From the team that brought you recent megahits like Bridesmaids and Spy, means you are in very safe hands with four former Saturday Night Live girls in the lead roles who know how to get laughs a plenty. It has exactly the same tone as the original two movies and is great fun. Bustin’ makes us feel good.

    Time – 116 mins; Certificate – 12A.

    Tagline – ‘Who Ya gonna Call’ & ‘Answer The Call’.

    THE GAY UK FACTOR – If THEGAYUK office was making a Ghostbusters movie we would put Chris Hemsworth in tight T-shirts in as many scenes as possible. We would show several shots of the 6’4″ Aussie muscle hunk with his shirt off and we would close the movie with a three minute private lap dance with the sex god over the credits. Guess what the producers give us exactly all that and more and therefore topping up to our wank bank to the brim.

    Cast – Melissa McCarthy, Chris Hemsworth’s ass, Kristen Wiig, Chris Hemsworth’s pecs, Bill Murray, Chis Hemworth’s cock, Charles Dance, Chris Hemworth’s abs, Ozzy Osbourne, Chris Hemsworth’s thighs and an awful lot more of Chris Hemsworth and some other actors too…

    Key Player – Melissa McCarthy is the current queen of comedy and she leads from the front here in what should be an ensemble piece. She has so many funny lines many of which she ad-libbed. She is on the biggest roll in Hollywood at the moment with twelve straight hits and no misses and it won’t stop here.

    Budget – $144 Million, It will make a profit but won’t bust blocks as may have been hoped for it but a sequel will follow as set-up nicely with the post credit twist.

    Best Bit – 1. 44 mins; The end credits are simply great, with funny comedy clips, outtakes, sequel teasers and that Chris Hemsworth dance routine which caps out the whole movie nicely.

    Worst Bit – 21.00 mins; The big bad is neither very big or very bad and the film really picks up when in Scooby Doo type fashion the evil spirit starts to take over various main cast members and upping both the fun and jeopardy.

    Little Secret – When the movie was first assembled it was a butt clenching 4 hours and 15 mins long so some severe editing was required. As of today its trailer on YouTube was the most hated of all time as fans did not like the idea of the original guys being replaced by gals.

    Movie Mistake – Lots. After the first ghostly encounter when Erin is covered in gloop she hugs Abby who in the next shot has no gunk on her whatsoever, the ghostbusters vehicle Ecto 1 appears in their garage HQ before they have even acquired it in the story and the evil spirit can control a whole army of men and makes them dance but stupidly appear to have no power over the four ghostbusting girls who are obviously the real threat.

    Further Viewing – Ghostbusters 1 & 2, Men In Black 1 & 2, Bridesmaids, The Boss, Heat, Sister Act or anything with Sandra Bullock or Bette Midler in.

    Any Good – Perfectly adequate no more and no less. We have a suspicion that now all the homages to the original is out of the way that the sequel will be truly great. A weird kind of experience where after a neat opening scene, the movie then dips substantially and then gets gradually builds and gets better and better throughout as it progresses to a very lively climax . Giving you a marathon feel rather than a sprint.

    Rating – 51/100 (51st out of the last 100 films reviewed with 1 being Gay UK filmatic heaven and 100 being a dud).

  • FILM REVIEW | Nice Guys

    THE NICE GUYS – Bad cop, meaner sidekick in 70s set LA based film noir mystery thriller … and boy is it funny.

    Nutshell – Ryan Gosling’s ex-cop bumps into Russell Crowe’s hard case alcoholic hard nut investigator in a buddy movie where they simply hate each other. There is a dead porn star called Misty Mountains a femme fatale with a problem that goes right to the top. Slapstick, action, plot twists all laced with the Seventies feel of a Blaxpotation movie and Boogie Nights. The music is great, the story superb and the laughs between the two leads are plentiful.

    Time – 116 mins; Certificate – 15

    Tagline – ‘Nice Pair….They’re not that nice’.

    THE GAY UK FACTOR – Two of the sexiest men alive Gosling and Crowe going full mano et mano for the duration. This is masculine men ripping on each other and beating one another up rather than off for the duration. If you like either of these two guys you will truly love this and the film is about the porn industry too.

    Cast – Russell and Ryan, Angourie Rice and the gorgeous Kim Basinger.

    Key Player – Shane Black the director. A true pet project from the Iron Man director and writer of all the Lethal Weapon films, The Last Boy Scout and Last Action Hero. This guy knows buddy films as he in effect invented them and this is his masterpiece of the genre.

    Budget – A relatively modest $50 Million with stars of this calibre but period films always cost a lot so that money would be quickly mopped up. No problem as it got into profit in under two weeks and there is a lot more money on the way for this one.

    Best Bit – 1.05 mins; The secret is the interplay between the two leads and it is best shown in a comedy masterclass inside a toilet closet.

    Worst Bit – 1.10 mins; The unnecessary dream sequences the first one leading to a car crash just don’t fit with the films tone – who needs giant bee’s etc ?

    Little Secret – The project was initially proposed as a TV series but was re-tooled as a film after the pilot seemed to be going nowhere – good decision.

    Movie Mistake – As with all period pieces there are so many – both the Earth Wind & Fire songs in the club were not released when the movie was set and the song “Get Down On It” was 5 years later. Posters for Blondie who weren’t even formed then and TV shows and films such as London Calling did not exist in 1977 when this was set.
    Further Viewing – Lethal Weapons 1 through 4, Hot Fuzz, Men In Black, Hollywood Homicide, In Bruges and most of all the Rush Hour series.

    Any Good – This is pure cinema marmite if you like the tone it will be one of your favourites of the year if not you will just enjoy it as a decent well acted comedy thriller..

    Rating – 67/100 (67th out of the last 100 films reviewed with 1 being best and 100 being a damp squib).