October 13th Audre Lorde
Today’s black LGBT+ icon is Audre Lorde, a self-described “black, lesbian, mother, warrior, poet”
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Author: News Desk
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BLACK HISTORY MONTH | LGBT+ Icons: Indya Moore
October 12th Indya Moore
Indya Moore is today’s black LGBT+ icon. They (Indya uses they, their and them pronouns) are trans-non-binary and best known for playing Angel Evangelista in Pose. Time Magazine named Indya as one of the 100 most influential people in the world in 2019.
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This dating app has put “social distancing reminders” in between its user’s listings
Just in case you weren’t aware that you’re required to socially distance at the moment as the Covid-19 infection rate continues to climb, one dating app has put a visual reminder in its listings.
So aside from signs in supermarkets, on pavements, on public transport, on TV, radio and billboards, you can now get social distance reminders in your dating app.
Butterfly Dating, which is a “transgender first” dating site and app, has put an actual physical space in between its users and put a mask and “social distance zone” warning on its search results screen, to remind its users to keep their distance.
David Minns – Founder of Butterfly Dating, said “Many regions of the world are now seeing accelerated cases of COVID-19 and additional restrictions. Adding a social distancing zone into the app and site is a simple way to remind people.
“A small graphical change today could save several lives in the coming weeks and months.”
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Royal Vauxhall Tavern demands to see the evidence that hospitality is high risk when it comes to COVID 19.
One of the UK’s longest-running LGBT+ venues, the Royal Vauxhall Tavern, has demanded to see evidence that the hospitality setting is a ‘high-risk setting’ when it comes to spreading the coronavirus. The hospitality industry has been targetted by the UK’s governments, which have introduced numerous restrictions on the sector that could lead to job losses and closures.
Taking to Twitter the RVT stated simply, “Show us the evidence. Be more precise” after MP Oliver Dowden, the Secretary of State for Digital, Culture, Media and Sport, insisted that there was “academic evidence” to show “quite a high risk associated with hospitality settings”.
RVT went on to Thank Sky News‘ Kay Burley for her robust questioning of the MP who was unable to provide details, or to name the study on the show, in which he was invited on to talk about the measures the government were taking. He said there was “academic evidence” from the US, but was unable to cite the study or researchers who provided the evidence, but said that it was “robust”.
Business owners are planning to sue the government after the hospitality industry, in particular, has been heavily hit by Government-mandated restrictions.
Last week it was announced that Jeremy Joseph from G-A-Y had launched a legal challenge to the government’s controversial 10 PM curfew. He argued that the government had not put forward any scientific evidence to show that the new restrictions would work.
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Darren Grimes set to “take on the Met Police”
Darren Grimes, an openly gay, conservative journalist, has said that he’s set to take on the Metropolitan police after they opened an investigation after an interview Grimes published on his podcast, in which its subject used terms that have caused offence. In the interview, Dr David Starkey suggested slavery was not genocide because so many black people survived.
Taking to Twitter, the 27-year-old, said that the UK’s biggest police force, the Metropolitan Police had “threatened an unprecedented use of Public Order legislation to target me and my channel @ReasonedUK“, he added, that it should “concern anyone that believes in freedom of the press”.
Grimes released a video after he was summoned by the Met, by email, for a “voluntary” interview. However according to Grimes, he was threatened with arrest if he failed to attend. He described the investigation against him as an “outrageous abuse of taxpayer cash”.
Embed from Getty ImagesIn the video, uploaded to his official social media channel he said,
“So earlier this week I was contacted by the Metropolitan Police and told that if I didn’t attend a voluntary interview with them, I’d be arrested.
“I’ve been accused for stirring up racial hatred for an interview I did with Dr David Starkey back in June.
“It’s just such an outrageous abuse of taxpayer cash and the trust that we have in the police as citizens. So much so that at first I couldn’t believe it was real. I went into my local police station to verify the email.
He continued, ‘The only hatred Dr Starkey stirred up was against himself, even after apologising, the repercussions for him after that interview had been severe. He’s lost every position he ever held, he wasn’t cancelled, he was airbrushed from history.
“I even said myself in a statement that I hold my hands up and should have robustly questioned Dr Starkey, but why would I bother if my intention was to stir up racial hatred?”
Does the polices’ action threaten free speech and the press?
Speaking about the “chilling effect” on free speech, Grimes said that the press has to be permitted to interview a wide range of people.
He added, “Where does setting this precedent get us if journalists and broadcasters are arrested if the people they’re interviewing say things that can be classed as likely to stir up hatred?
“In a free and democratic society, journalists and broadcasters have to be permitted to interview a wide range of people, including those likely to make a controversial remark.
“To then threaten them with arrest will have a real chilling effect on free speech and debate in this country.
“I’m going to fight this all the way and I’m delighted to say that I’m joined by the Free Speech Union.
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A Security flaw has been playing havoc with this male sex toy
A chastity device has apparently had security issues in which users have found themselves locked out after someone managed to hack the product’s app.
The £145 product, called the Cellmate Chastity Cage by Qiui, has now apparently had a fix issued by its Chinese developers, but users must update to the new app. Using the old app could expose users to the security flaw and become locked into their device, without the ability to cancel its locking mechanisms.
The hack meant that everyone who was using the device could be locked into it and their ability to control it was overridden. Scarily there’s NO manual override, meaning many users would have had to destroy their chastity devices to get out of them.
There is a fix however, there’s a new app. Users who are still using the old app are still at risk of having their device hacked.
Pen Test Partners discovered the hack and took to YouTube to explain their findings, saying
“Over the years we’ve looked at a number of smart adult toys, raising concerns.
“My esteemed colleague Alex Lomas […] has been looking at this device, which is wonderful: a male chastity device. The idea is you put the appendage in here, you put a clamp on behind the testicles and you’re then well and truly locked in.
“It’s smart, so it’s locked under Bluetooth, so you can use a smartphone to lock it. There’s a mobile app, an API.
“Then, being a chastity device, you then give permission to lock to someone you trust, who then has control over your… device.
“Unfortunately Alex found an insecure direct object reference in the API. It meant he could take over everyone’s chastity device and lock everybody in.
“Believe it or not there’s no manual unlock, key or override. The only way to get out is to cut through this, which is hardened steel and given where it’s a that’s going to be quite difficult to get yourself out of.
“Now, it’s not for us to kink-shame. If people want to use these devices that’s absolutely fine with us. I just think people should be able to use these securely and safely.
“Unfortunately, many adult toys are let down by their lack of attention to security which really exposes their users.”
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Met police supports National Hate Crime Awareness Week
The Metropolitan Police Service supports National Hate Crime Awareness Week which launched on Saturday, 10 October, and across London officers will be holding a range of events to get the public talking about hate crime and how to tackle it.
National Hate Crime Awareness Week (National HCAW) is an annual event organised by charity 17-24-30 National HCAW, which aims to bring people together in solidarity against hate crime in all its forms.
Throughout the week, the Met is working with partners, charities and local authorities to highlight support available to victims, raise awareness, and encourage victims of hate crime to report it.
Due to the coronavirus restrictions, most of the events are being held online. However, there will be real-world community drop-in events at venues that can be made COVID-19 safe, throughout the week. There will also be enforcement activity, targeting offenders wanted for offences where hate crime is a feature.
The outbreak of COVID-19 has presented many new challenges for the Met and policing as a whole. In London, there was a rise in reports of racially-aggravated hate crime incidents where certain communities were targeted due to the pandemic.
In response to this, alongside our enforcement work, hate crime advice leaflets and videos were translated into a number of languages and distributed to the affected communities to ensure victims knew where to go to seek support, and how to report to police or other organisations.
Between September 2019 and August 2020, hate crime reports saw a 12.7 per cent increase compared with the previous 12 months.
Superintendent Waheed Khan, the Met’s Lead Responsible Officer (LRO) for hate crime, said, “London is a city that celebrates diversity and tolerance, and in 2020 no-one should be discriminated against because of their race, religion, sexual orientation or gender identity.
“The Met takes all reports of hate crime extremely seriously, and we work with partners to support victims and identify offenders. During the coronavirus pandemic, we have continued this work despite the challenges.
“We have Hate Crime Co-ordinators working across all London boroughs engaging with affected communities. The Met also has a Central Hate Crime Hub which supports investigations into hate crimes committed both in the real world and online.
“While there has been a rise in the number of hate crimes reported which may be due to victims feeling more confident and empowered to report incidents, there is still work to be done.
“We know that some victims might be reluctant to, or not think to report hate crimes committed against them to police, and they often aren’t aware of the support available to them.
“We would urge anyone who has experienced hate crime and not spoken to police to come forward – we will take it seriously. If you don’t want to speak to police, there are other ways you can get help and support.”
The Met’s main hate crime partners form the CATCH alliance, a group of anti-hate crime charities which include TellMAMA (Islamophobia) Galop (anti-LGBT+ hate crime), and the Community Security Trust (anti-Semitism).
Hate crime is any crime deriving from hostility or prejudice towards a person because of their race, religion, sexual orientation, disability or gender identity. Incidents may involve a physical attack, damage to property, bullying, harassment, verbal abuse, or abuse using social media.
How to report a Hate Crime
To report a hate crime, call police on 101, report online or tweet @MetCC.
If there is an immediate risk or an emergency situation, always call 999. Information can also be reported anonymously to Crimestoppers on 0800 555 111 or online, or via the TruVision website.
For advice about how to report hate crime, go to our website.
+ The Met has arranged a large number of free hate crime events online that are open to the public and will feature a range of guest speakers. They will be held on Zoom and British Sign Language will be available. Many of these events have been organised locally.
Further information about a small selection of webinars is available by clicking the links below:
– Race: Monday, 12 October – 14:00 to 17:00hrs
– Religion: Tuesday, 13 October – 11:00 to 13:00hrs
– Disability: Wednesday, 14 October – 12:00 to 14:00hrs
– Sexual Orientation: Thursday, 15 October – 09:30 to 12:30hrs
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Austin Wolf shares his heart-warming experience of coming out to his mom
Adult star Austin Wolf, has shared a heartwarming story to his 458,000 fans on Twitter of coming out to his mum for National Coming Out Day.
Like so many people, Austin chose to come out to his mum on the phone when he was still a teenager.
Speaking in a video, posted to Twitter, the star, said,
“When I came out I was 17/18 years old and it was actually over the phone with my mother, who was, needless to say upset, not happy. But when it came down to it, she loved me and she listened, she wanted to learn”.
However, as Austin goes on to share, love plays a huge part in family members getting over their initial feelings when their loved ones come out to them.
He continued,
“I actually remember her calling the rest of my family, very dramatic of course, ‘if you can’t accept him, then you can’t accept all of us’, which coming from a woman from Texas… and definitely didn’t exactly have an open mind about homosexuality at the time… that’s what love does”.
Wolf who has filmed scenes for studios like Cocky Boys, shared the video on his social media and many of his fans thanked him for telling his story.
Fellow porn star, Ryan Cox added, “I had a very similar experience…I came out to my mom over the phone on November 25, 2007. That day changed my entire world. I am very fortunate to say my family fully accepted me as ME and has never waivered all these years later.”
A fan, wrote how “uplifting” the video was while another added that the story was “touching”.
One commented added that Austin clearly had an “amazing mum”.
Want to see Austin Wolf in action at Cocky Boys? Click here (NSFW)
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BLACK HISTORY MONTH | LGBT+ Icons: Zanele Muholi
October 11th Zanele Muholi
Today’s black LGBT+ icon is Zanele Muholi, a South African artist whose body of work focus on black lesbian, trans and intersex people.
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Top 11 Coming Out YouTube Videos
Taking to YouTube is now one of the best ways for stars to talk directly to their fans, especially about painful or personal experience. Their stories are told in their own voice and there’s no distortion of the truth.
These awesome people made the decision to come out on their own terms and we applaud them.
Matt And Blue, Actor and Musician
226,415
Despite coming out through a Twitter post back in 2013, Matt Dallas and his partner Blue Hamilton decided to make a coming out video to talk about the how’s, the why’s and the everything’s… Super cute and really fun.
George Shelley, Union J Singer
525,096 views
Union J singer George Shelley, posted a video telling his fans he had something he wanted to talk about. In his video he says that he’s attracted to men and women and that labels like gay or bi were “old fashioned”.
Billy Gillman, Singer
928,777 views
Just days after fellow country singer Ty Herndon came out, Billy Gillman made this emotional YouTube video. In the five and a half minute video the vocalist talked about life with his partner and his difficultly with major record labels wanting to re-sign him, despite selling 5 million records.
Lucas Cruickshank, YouTuber
4,914,186 views
In possibly the most fun coming out video Lucas literally burst out of the closet and into the open after one fan asked the simple question “are you gay”.
Troye Sivan, X Men Actor turned singer
6,436,896 views
X Men actor Troye came out on YouTube at the age of 18 in 2013. In his emotional video he said,
“I’m terrified. I know that some people are going to have a problem with this. This could kind of change everything for me, but it shouldn’t have to. And that’s why I’m making this video, and that’s why I think it’s important for people to make these kinds of videos.”
Shane Dawson, YouTuber
7,264,707 views
In 2015 Shane Dawson came out as bisexual in a video that has now been seen over 7 million times. He said, emotionally,
“This is a really hard video to make. I’m really scared… I never thought I would be making this, ever. I woke up this morning and I just had to.
“I’m making this video because I feel like it could help a lot of people. Over the last year, I’ve been extremely sexually confused.
“I always wished that I was gay, that I was just 100 percent gay. It would be a lot easier to be accepted by people… but I’m not.
Joey Graceffa, YouTuber
6,734,448 views
Gorgeous Joey came out on YouTube as gay in 2015. He went on to release a music video which featured a pretty hot, non heteronormative story line of princes falling in love with each other.
Connor Franta, YouTuber,
10, 355,416 views
Connor Franta’s coming out video made mainstream news. In a video simply named “Coming Out” the YouTuber told his 3.6 subscribers that he was gay, saying,
“I’m sitting here with no script, no plan, no fancy editing, and I’m just gonna be really honest,”
Tom Daley, Diver,
11,761, 500 views
The Olympic champion diver took to YouTube at the end of 2013 to say that he was in a relationship with a man. He described the posting of the video as a “hard decision to make” but ultimately he wanted his fans to hear it directly from him.
Ingrid Nilsen, YouTuber.
14, 1999,691
Ingrid came out as gay in 2015 in a highly emotional video and is to date the second most viewed coming out YouTube video, which might be down to the fact that the vlogger has nearly 4 million subscribers.
The Rhodes Bros
21, 773,092 views
Reaching out far ahead of any other YouTube coming out video is the
Rhodes’ twins coming out as gay to their father on the phone. The video had huge media pick up which help ratchet the views to over 21 million.
This article was first published in Feb 2016
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These are some of the best tips for coming out as LGBT
We asked readers and our writers their top tips on how to come out. Remember, that everybody’s experience is different and not all these tips will work in your particular circumstances, but we liked the following top tips.
1) Only come out if it is what you want to do.
If you feel pressured into coming out, remember that it has to be your decision. It is a big decision to make in your life and the most important thing is that you feel comfortable with what you are doing.
2) Treat it like a bandaid and just tear it off.
Quick and almost painless. Just tell them, quickly, confidently and get it over with.
3) Don’t approach the situation like you’re about to announce you’re terminally ill.
Body language and the tone of your voice will play a massive role in how people react to what you’re saying.
4) Do it the way you most feel comfortable!
I told my Dad by letter, but my friends mainly face to face…it just got easier the more I did it.
5) Speaking to a helpline, like Switchboard – first.
If you’re not sure what to say. Talking with a counsellor or helpline can help you find the words you need to describe what you’re feeling.
6) Talk about someone else’s coming out.
If you’re not sure how to bring it up, casually talk about a celebrity’s recent coming out like Tom Daley or Charlie King and gauge the reaction before going any further.
7) If you don’t get the reaction you expect, don’t be put off.
You will get some negative reactions, but that is their problem not yours. The amount of positive reactions will far outweigh the negative ones.
8) It’s not an all or nothing deal.
You don’t HAVE to tell everyone all at once. Start off with one person and let it grow organically from there.
9) Don’t apologise.
10) There is no right or wrong way to come out.
It should be a tailor-made experience, as individual as you are.
11) Don’t come out
If you think that doing so is going to put your life in danger or make your living situation a living nightmare. Living with homophobic or transphobic parents or guardians could put the roof over your head into jeopardy by coming out. It’s so unfortunate, but for many it’s an outcome that sees them living on the streets. Work towards living independently, where it can be “your house, your rules”. In the meantime, find your tribe – your people, the people you feel most comfortable with -at school, at work, online. Share stories, be yourself with them and try to carve out an authentic life, until you’re able to be free.
This article was first published in 2014 and has been updated. We’ll continue to update it with more tips and advice as we get it.
