THEGAYUK

Tag: Sexplainer

All the latest sex advice for the gay and LGBT+ community.

  • Are there gay cruising grounds in Glasgow?

    Are there gay cruising grounds in Glasgow?

    Did you know there are many gay cruising and dogging grounds in Glasgow?

    Glasgow and its surrounding areas is home to several cruising and dogging grounds, did that surprise you?

    Whether you love or loathe the idea of anonymous outdoor gay sex, it’s hard to escape the fact that gay cruising grounds are all around us.

    You probably don’t even know, but from where you’re sitting or standing right now there’s probably a cruising or dogging ground just metres away from you in Glasgow, and they’re a hangover from more homophobic times in the UK. At our last count, there were at least six known cruising grounds in Glasgow and surrounding areas. The most popular are Yorkhill Park and Greyfriars Road.

    Interested in all cruising grounds in Scotland? Check out Scottish gay cruising grounds here.

    Why have cruising grounds become more popular?

    Although we can’t say for sure, something has to be said about how the Coronavirus pandemic lockdown has affected the way in which gay, bi and curious men get sex. With saunas and bathhouses closed for the best part of three months, many more are yet to still open, guys who can’t, or don’t want to accommodate in their own homes are looking to other places. One of those will be outdoor venues.

    Where did gay cruising come from?

    Gay cruising is not a new phenomenon. It dates back to when sex between men was illegal in the UK. Finding a place where two men could be intimate with each other without too many questions being raised was tricky until it was realised that men’s public toilets were a perfect place.

    These were named cottages because they actually used to look like quaint little cottages.

    The act of finding sex in these public conveniences became known as “cottaging“.

    The sex between men who would frequent a cottage would usually be anonymous. Gloryholes, a hole drilled between stalls in public toilets became a way in which this sex could remain faceless.

    To this day there are loads of cottages and cruising grounds in Glasgow

    Cottaging and cruising etiquette

    Are there gay cruising grounds in Edinburgh?
    Photo by Ketut Subiyanto on Pexels.com

    Generally speaking, not a lot of talking goes on when cruising. A series of looks and gestures would let others know what you were up to. At urinals, guys would stand, playing with themselves subtly to let others know that they were up for some play. Then if the feeling is mutual the pair could make their way to a cubicle for more privacy.

    At cruising grounds, much of the same would happen, except the action took place away from public footpaths.

    Is Cottaging Legal in the UK?

    Cottaging is illegal in the United Kingdom under the Sexual Offences Act 2003 and applies to both heterosexual and homosexual acts.

    The Sexual Offences Act 2003 doesn’t say however that sex in a public place is illegal. Cruising grounds and cottaging are two different spaces. Cruising grounds are defined as open spaces, where men can hook up with men, or straight couples can meet for sex (often referred to as dogging), as long as no members of the public can see you.

    You risk being arrested if reported by a member of the public. If this happens you have the right to legal advice from an on-duty solicitor at the police station. If convicted you could be sentenced to 6 months in prison and /or a fine.

  • Are there gay cruising grounds in Edinburgh?

    Are there gay cruising grounds in Edinburgh?

    Did you know there are many gay cruising and dogging grounds in Edinburgh?

    Edinburgh is home to several cruising and dogging grounds, did that surprise you?

    Whether you love or loathe the idea of anonymous outdoor gay sex, it’s hard to escape the fact that gay cruising grounds are all around us.

    You probably don’t even know, but from where you’re sitting or standing right now there’s probably a cruising or dogging ground just metres away from you in Edinburgh, and they’re a hangover from more homophobic times in the UK. At our last count, there were at least 7 known cruising grounds in Edinburgh and surrounding areas. The most popular are Sliverknowes Promenade and Blackford Hill.

    Interested in all cruising grounds in Scotland? Check out Scottish gay cruising grounds here.

    Why have cruising grounds become more popular?

    Although we can’t say for sure, something has to be said about how the Coronavirus pandemic lockdown has affected the way in which gay, bi and curious men get sex. With saunas and bathhouses closed for the best part of three months, many more are yet to still open, guys who can’t, or don’t want to accommodate in their own homes are looking to other places. One of those will be outdoor venues.

    Where did gay cruising come from?

    Gay cruising is not a new phenomenon. It dates back to when sex between men was illegal in the UK. Finding a place where two men could be intimate with each other without too many questions being raised was tricky until it was realised that men’s public toilets were a perfect place.

    These were named cottages because they actually used to look like quaint little cottages.

    The act of finding sex in these public conveniences became known as “cottaging“.

    The sex between men who would frequent a cottage would usually be anonymous. Gloryholes, a hole drilled between stalls in public toilets became a way in which this sex could remain faceless.

    To this day there are loads of cottages and cruising grounds in Edinburgh

    Cottaging and cruising etiquette

    Are there gay cruising grounds in Edinburgh?
    Photo by Ketut Subiyanto on Pexels.com

    Generally speaking, not a lot of talking goes on when cruising. A series of looks and gestures would let others know what you were up to. At urinals, guys would stand, playing with themselves subtly to let others know that they were up for some play. Then if the feeling is mutual the pair could make their way to a cubicle for more privacy.

    At cruising grounds, much of the same would happen, except the action took place away from public footpaths.

    Is Cottaging Legal in the UK?

    Cottaging is illegal in the United Kingdom under the Sexual Offences Act 2003 and applies to both heterosexual and homosexual acts.

    The Sexual Offences Act 2003 doesn’t say however that sex in a public place is illegal. Cruising grounds and cottaging are two different spaces. Cruising grounds are defined as open spaces, where men can hook up with men, or straight couples can meet for sex (often referred to as dogging), as long as no members of the public can see you.

    You risk being arrested if reported by a member of the public. If this happens you have the right to legal advice from an on-duty solicitor at the police station. If convicted you could be sentenced to 6 months in prison and /or a fine.

  • Why do some gay men wear harnesses?

    Why do some gay men wear harnesses?

    Many gay men wear harnesses at saunas, clubs and at pride events and their origin within the gay community is an interesting story.

    Origins from BDSM, Kink and the vision of manliness

    Most likely the wearing of harnesses comes from the leather and kink communities, although harnesses have evolved beyond their original associations with leather and BDSM. Modern harnesses come in various materials, styles, and designs, catering to a broad spectrum of tastes within the gay community.

    Some individuals may have perceived harnesses as a symbol of confidence, strength, or assertiveness, which aligns with certain traditional notions of masculinity. In this sense, wearing a harness can be a way for some gay men to express themselves in a manner they associate with masculinity.

    Five reasons why some gay men wear harnesses

    1. Fashion and Style: Many gay men wear harnesses as a fashion statement. Harnesses come in various designs and materials, allowing individuals to express their unique style and enhance their overall look.
    2. Club and Nightlife Scene: Harnesses are popular in the LGBTQ+ club and nightlife scene. They can be seen as a bold and confident choice for those who want to stand out and make a statement during events, parties, or pride celebrations.
    3. Body Positivity: Some gay men wear harnesses as a way to celebrate and embrace their bodies. It can be a form of body positivity and self-expression, allowing individuals to showcase their confidence and comfort with their own skin.
    4. Kink and BDSM: In the context of kink and BDSM (Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, Sadism, and Masochism), harnesses may be worn as part of fetish or role-playing activities. It’s essential to note that not all gay men who wear harnesses are involved in BDSM.
    5. Empowerment and Liberation: Wearing a harness can be a symbol of empowerment and liberation for some individuals. It represents breaking free from societal norms and expressing one’s authentic self.

    Do Tops Or Bottoms wear harnesses?

    The choice to wear a harness is not necessarily tied to someone’s sexual role as a top or bottom. Both tops and bottoms, as well as individuals who identify as versatile or sides/switch, can wear harnesses. The decision to wear a harness is more about personal style, fashion preferences, and individual expression rather than sexual roles.

    What kind of harnesses are there?

    There are various types of harnesses, each serving different purposes and often associated with specific contexts such as fashion, BDSM, or outdoor activities. Here are some common types of harnesses:

    1. Chest Harness:
      • Style: Wraps around the chest, creating a visually striking design.
      • Use: Popular as a fashion accessory and can be part of BDSM attire.
    2. Body Harness:
      • Style: Extends beyond the chest, covering the torso in intricate patterns.
      • Use: Fashionable accessories in alternative fashion scenes and BDSM.
    3. Shoulder Harness:
      • Style: Covers the shoulders and upper chest, often creating a bold look.
      • Use: Aesthetic accessory in fashion and alternative scenes.
    4. Leather Harness:
      • Style: Made from leather, providing a rugged or fetish aesthetic.
      • Use: Common in BDSM and alternative fashion.
    5. Harness Bra:
      • Style: Combines elements of a bra and harness for a sensual look.
      • Use: Fashionable lingerie or BDSM accessory.
    6. Full-Body Harness:
      • Style: Extends across the chest, torso, and sometimes down to the hips or thighs.
      • Use: Can be a fashion statement or part of more elaborate BDSM attire.

    How to care for your harness

    Caring for your harness is essential to ensure its longevity, maintain its appearance, and promote safety, especially if it’s a safety or BDSM harness. Here are general care tips:

    1. Read and Follow Care Instructions:
      • Always check and follow any care instructions provided by the manufacturer. Different materials and designs may require specific care.
    2. Cleaning:
      • Regularly clean your harness to remove dirt, sweat, and oils. Use a damp cloth or sponge for spot cleaning.
      • For leather harnesses, use a leather cleaner or a mild soap designed for leather. Avoid harsh chemicals that can damage the material.
    3. Drying:
      • Allow your harness to air-dry completely before storing it. Avoid direct sunlight, high heat, or using a hairdryer, as these can damage certain materials.
    4. Storage:
      • Store your harness in a cool, dry place away from direct sunlight. Hanging it or laying it flat can help maintain its shape.
      • For leather harnesses, use a dust bag or wrap it in a soft cloth to prevent scratches.
    5. Avoid Moisture:
      • Keep your harness away from excessive moisture or humidity, as it can lead to mold, mildew, or leather damage.
    6. Inspect Regularly:
      • Check the harness regularly for any signs of wear, loose stitching, or damage. Repair or replace any damaged parts promptly.
    7. Use Appropriate Lubricants:
      • If your harness is used in BDSM activities, be mindful of the type of lubricant you use. Some lubricants can damage certain materials. Choose a compatible, body-safe lubricant.
    8. Rotate Use:
      • If you have multiple harnesses, rotate their use to prevent overuse and prolong their lifespan.
    9. Avoid Extreme Conditions:
      • Avoid exposing your harness to extreme conditions such as extreme heat, cold, or prolonged sunlight, as these can cause damage.
    10. Follow Safety Guidelines:
      • If your harness is a safety harness for activities like rock climbing or racing, follow the specific safety guidelines provided for its care and use.

    Where can you buy gay harnesses from?

    Clonezone, THEGAYSHOP and Fetch all have great selections of Harnesses

  • Can the Python Sex Position be adapted for gay men?

    Can the Python Sex Position be adapted for gay men?

    As with most sex positions in the Karma Sutra, the python can be adapted for a gay male couple. For straight couples the python is described as such:

    How a straight couple would do the python sex position

    The male partner lies flat on his back; while the woman straddles him and lower herself onto his penis. Then slowly the woman stretches out so she’s lying straight on top of him, aligned arm to arm, leg to leg. She then holds his hands, extends her arms out to her sides and lifts her torso like a snake ready to strike.

    He keeps his feet flexed so you can push against them with your toes for leverage.

    This position won’t work particularly well for two men, but with a slight adjustment it will work – all you have to do is simply reverse the person on top as explained below.

    Here’s how to adapt the Python Sex Position for two men

    Have your partner recline flat on his back, legs together, and arms resting by his sides.

    The bottom should astride the top, on his knees, facing away as though he’s about to do the reverse cowboy, and lower himself onto the top’s penis or strap-on dildo. 

    Once the bottom has fully accommodated the top, he should gently lay back, maybe using his arms to take some of his weight. Eventually, you should be able to lie flat on top of the top. You should try and get your limbs aligned. Ultimately the easiest way to think of this position is hugging your bottom from behind, but lying down. 

    A word to the wise, if you’re not both weight matched and your bottom is heavier than your top, you may need to use your arms to support his weight. 

    Basically at this point both bodies should be alligned together looking sort of like a snake(!) but of course not really. 

    This position is great for tight spaces and for an unexperienced bottom to control the top’s movement and thrusting power.

    Want more gay sex positions? Check out our very own gay Karma Sutra

  • Gay Glossary: ATM, what does ATM mean?

    Gay Glossary: ATM, what does ATM mean?

    ATM stands for “Ass to Mouth,” which is a sexual act where the penis or another object is inserted into the anus and then put into the mouth without washing or disinfecting it in between.

    It is considered a risky sexual activity due to the potential for bacterial infection, and should be approached with caution and proper hygiene practices.

    Do gay men do ATM more often then straight people?

    There is no evidence to suggest that gay men engage in ass-to-mouth any more or less frequently than any other demographic. However since more gay men partake in anal sex it is likely that gay, bi, and men who have sex with men engage in ass-to-mouth action.

    It is important to remember that sexual preferences and behaviors are highly individual and vary widely among individuals of all sexual orientations. Additionally, it is worth noting that any sexual activity, including ATM, carries a risk of bacterial infection and should be approached with caution and proper hygiene practices.

    What are the risks of ATM?

    What is ATM and what does it mean?
    The risks of ATM are real… so be careful!

    Engaging in ass-to-mouth sexual activity can carry a number of potential risks, including the transmission of bacterial infections. This is because the rectum and anus naturally contain a large amount of bacteria, some of which can be harmful if introduced into the mouth or other parts of the body. Some specific risks may include:

    1. Bacterial infections: If bacteria from the anus or rectum are introduced into the mouth or throat, it can lead to infections such as gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis, or E. coli.
    2. STI transmission: Engaging in ATM can also increase the risk of transmitting sexually transmitted infections (STIs) like HIV, hepatitis A, and hepatitis B.
    3. Oral health risks: In addition to the risk of bacterial infections and STI transmission, ATM can also potentially lead to oral health issues like gum disease, tooth decay, and bad breath.

    Is there an ATM emoji?

    Not really, but you could use this sequence to suggest you’re into ass to mouth. 🍑🍆👄, but you know it’s probs quicker to write ATM.

    Who came up with the term ATM?

    It’s unclear who exactly coined the term “ATM” for the sexual act of “ass to mouth.” Like many sexual terms and phrases, its origins are difficult to trace and likely developed over time within certain sexual communities.

  • How can I keep from farting during anal sex?

    How can I keep from farting during anal sex?

    Short answer, you really can’t stop a fart during anal sex

    It can happen to the best of us – the fuck fart. He pulls out and you parp. It’s just the way it goes – and most likely is probably not an actual tummy-made gas, so is it really a fart?

    In women or some trans guys who have a vagina, it’s called Queefing and it’s essentially the air that escapes the vagina – but a fart and queef can both sound the same. So what should we call air that escapes your bottom during sex, but isn’t actually gas from your intestines… Beefing?

    There’s no real way to stop Beefing as the air that gets pumped inside you (as your top is pounding away) really doesn’t have anywhere else to go, but back out your butt hole. Also as you have anal sex, the muscles around your hole – the sphincter, which is the muscle that can stop a normal fart will have relaxed quite considerably, so it might be quite hard to clench to stop the escaping air.

    This is why you might beef when the top pulls out, especially if it’s unexpected. The air that escapes is most likely to be air that’s been trapped in your rectum rather than from your lower intestine. Which is a good thing, because it’s also highly unlikely to smell – especially if you’ve prepped for sex, by douching.

    What’s the difference between a fart and a beef?

    how not to fart during anal sex

    A fart is gas caused by the breakdown of food and bacteria in your gut and intestines. Some foods will make you toot more, so it’s best to steer clear from them before any kind of anal activity. A beef is just air that is pumped into your rectum during anal sex.

    [totalpoll id=”127075″]

    Some positions will make you beef more

    The Butter Churn is a prime example of a position that can make you fart when he pulls out. That’s where the bottom props up his back with his hands and puts both legs in the air above his head, while the top enters in a downward motion. Its a bit like a plunger – and that causes a lot of air movement.

    Staying clear of any position where your butthole is likely to be more exposed like if your legs are wide open might also contribute to a build-up of air in your rectum.

    Also, the slow plough, where your top thrusts all the way in and then all the way out of your ass is likely to get air trapped, so don’t be surprised if you parp a little during this.

    What do you if you fart during anal sex?

    [totalpoll id=”127067″]

    The best thing to do is laugh at it or just ignore it altogether. Try not to be embarrassed about it, or even apologise for it. It’s completely normal, happens to everyone and there’s nothing you can really do about it anyway.

    You never know the guy you’re with might actually be turned on the sound of your beef. So just go with it. Don’t let it stop the fun.

    Images from Bel Ami and Lucas Entertainment

  • Do I need to use lube for anal sex?

    Do I need to use lube for anal sex?

    When it comes to anal sex, lube is always best and usually, just like bottles of booze at a party – the more the merrier. You really shouldn’t try the Brokeback Mountain spit and shove. You’re likely to hurt yourself and cause damage to your anus or rectum.

    You really can’t go wrong with using lubes and there are so many types, brands and bases to try. Some are best if you’re going bareback (that’s sex without a condom) whilst other work best if you’re rubbering up. Some are even recommended for fisting… but maybe that’s a different article altogether.

    So what’s the best lube for the job?

    Lubes for sex with a condom?

    If you’re going for a standard, rubbered up sesh, then a silicone or water-based lube is the best. We recommend lubes like the Liquid Silk or the specially designed anal lube from Lubido. These work best with condom usage. You can also use them in bareback sex as well. Water-based lubes are the easiest to wash and wipe off and don’t stain the bedsheets.

    A note to the wise, when using condoms, you may want to use a little more lube than you think you should. It can feel a little drier than without a condom and you should never use oil-based lubes for condom play – it could destroy the integrity of the johnny.

    Also never lube up your penis before putting on a condom. The condom is really likely to slip off if you do this. Only lube up the outside of the condom.

    Silicon-based lubes tend to last longer than water-based, but not as long as petroleum-based lubes. They are also a little stickier than water-based ones.

    What’s the best lube for bareback sex?

    For bareback sex you can use water, silicone, oil or petroleum-based lubes. Oil or petroleum-based lubes are more likely to stain your sheets with oil marks, however.

    We absolutely recommend ID Millennium for bareback sex. It last longer and a little goes a long way.

    More buttery or oily lubes are better for other types of ass play – like fisting. Brands such as Crisco are famous in the gay community for their lubricating abilities.

    So how do you apply lube?

    A lube launcher can really help you get lube exactly where you need it.

    Well, there’s two schools of thought.

    As a bottom or the receptive partner you can take control of the lube situation, by maybe putting some lube on your own butthole before you begin, perhaps as you’re getting ready. Use your fingers to get some lube right up inside you. Or you can use a lube launcher, which puts the lube right where you need it!

    During the action, you can cover your partner’s dick (condomed or without) with lube as you blow him or jerk him off.

    Or if you’re the topper, you can maybe play with your partner’s ass during foreplay and use your fingers to fully lubricate the area. Either way, you’re going to want to make sure that you use enough – and don’t worry about stopping the action if you feel like you need more.

    Remember more is more in these situations and it’s best to try a variety of lubes to see which works best for you.

  • Are there gay cruising grounds in Wolverhampton?

    Are there gay cruising grounds in Wolverhampton?

    Did you know there are many gay cruising and dogging grounds in Wolverhampton?

    Wolverhampton is home to several cruising and dogging grounds, did that surprise you?

    Whether you love or loathe the idea of anonymous outdoor gay sex, it’s hard to escape the fact that gay cruising grounds are all around us.

    You probably don’t even know, but from where you’re sitting or standing right now there’s probably a cruising or dogging ground just metres away from you in Wolverhampton, and they’re a hangover from more homophobic times in the UK. At our last count, there were at least 22 known cruising grounds in Norwich and over 10 cruising grounds in Wolverhampton and that number is growing

    Why have cruising grounds become more popular?

    Although we can’t say for sure, something has to be said about how the Coronavirus pandemic lockdown has affected the way in which gay, bi and curious men get sex. With saunas and bathhouses closed for the best part of three months, many more are yet to still open, guys who can’t, or don’t want to accomodate in their own homes are looking to other places. One of those will be outdoor venues.

    Where did gay cruising come from?

    Gay cruising is not a new phenomenon. It dates back to when sex between men was illegal in the UK. Finding a place where two men could be intimate with each other without too many questions being raised was tricky until it was realised that men’s public toilets were a perfect place.

    These were named cottages because they actually used to look like quaint little cottages.

    The act of finding sex in these public conveniences became known as “cottaging“.

    The sex between men who would frequent a cottage would usually be anonymous. Gloryholes, a hole drilled between stalls in public toilets became a way in which this sex could remain faceless.

    To this day there are loads of cottages and cruising grounds in Wolverhampton and in wider Staffordshire.

    Cottaging and cruising etiquette

    Are there gay cruising grounds in Wolverhampton?
    Photo by Ketut Subiyanto on Pexels.com

    Generally speaking, not a lot of talking goes on when cruising. A series of looks and gestures would let others know what you were up to. At urinals, guys would stand, playing with themselves subtly to let others know that they were up for some play. Then if the feeling is mutual the pair could make their way to a cubicle for more privacy.

    At cruising grounds, much of the same would happen, except the action took place away from public footpaths.

    Is Cottaging Ilegal in the UK?

    Cottaging is illegal in the United Kingdom under the Sexual Offences Act 2003 and applies to both heterosexual and homosexual acts.

    The Sexual Offences Act 2003 doesn’t say however that sex in a public place is illegal. Cruising grounds and cottaging are two different spaces. Cruising grounds are defined as open spaces, where men can hook up with men, or straight couples can meet for sex (often referred to as dogging), as long as no members of the public can see you.

    You risk being arrested if reported by a member of the public. If this happens you have the right to legal advice from an on-duty solicitor at the police station. If convicted you could be sentenced to 6 months in prison and /or a fine.

  • Are there gay cruising grounds in Norwich?

    Are there gay cruising grounds in Norwich?

    Did you know there are many gay cruising and dogging grounds in Norwich?

    Whether you love or loathe the idea of anonymous outdoor gay sex, it’s hard to escape the fact that gay cruising grounds are all around us.

    You probably don’t even know, but from where you’re sitting or standing right now there’s probably a cruising or dogging ground just metres away from you in Norwich, and they’re a hangover from more homophobic times in the UK. At our last count, there were at least 22 known cruising grounds in Norwich and over 27 cruising grounds in Norfolk.

    Gay cruising is not a new phenomenon. It dates back to when sex between men was illegal in the UK. Finding a place where two men could be intimate with each other without too many questions being raised was tricky until it was realised that men’s public toilets were a perfect place.

    These were named cottages because they actually used to look like quaint little cottages.

    The act of finding sex in these public conveniences became known as “cottaging“.

    The sex between men who would frequent a cottage would usually be anonymous. Gloryholes, a hole drilled between stalls in public toilets became a way in which this sex could remain faceless.

    To this day there are loads of cottages and cruising grounds in Norwich and in wider Norfolk.

    Cottaging and cruising etiquette

    Are there gay cruising grounds in Norwich or Norfolk?
    Photo by Ketut Subiyanto on Pexels.com

    Generally speaking, not a lot of talking goes on when cruising. A series of looks and gestures would let others know what you were up to. At urinals, guys would stand, playing with themselves subtly to let others know that they were up for some play. Then if the feeling is mutual the pair could make their way to a cubicle for more privacy.

    At cruising grounds, much of the same would happen, except the action took place away from public footpaths.

    Is Cottaging Ilegal in the UK?

    Cottaging is illegal in the United Kingdom under the Sexual Offences Act 2003 and applies to both heterosexual and homosexual acts.

    The Sexual Offences Act 2003 doesn’t say however that sex in a public place is illegal. Cruising grounds and cottaging are two different spaces. Cruising grounds are defined as open spaces, where men can hook up with men, or straight couples can meet for sex (often referred to as dogging), as long as no members of the public can see you.

    You risk being arrested if reported by a member of the public. If this happens you have the right to legal advice from an on-duty solicitor at the police station. If convicted you could be sentenced to 6 months in prison and /or a fine.

  • Are there gay cruising grounds in Nottingham?

    Are there gay cruising grounds in Nottingham?

    Whether you love or loathe the idea of anonymous outdoor gay sex, it’s hard to escape the fact that there cruising and dogging grounds everywhere. Even in Nottingham!

    You probably don’t even know, but from where you’re sitting or standing right now there’s probably a cruising or dogging ground just metres away from you in Nottingham, and there’s a reason why they exist – they’re a hangover from more homophobic times in the UK.

    Gay cruising is not a new phenomenon. It dates back to when sex between men was illegal in the UK. Finding a place where two men could be intimate with each other without too many questions being raised was tricky until it was realised that men’s public toilets were a perfect place.

    These were named cottages because they actually used to look like quaint little cottages.

    The act of finding sex in these public conveniences became known as “cottaging“.

    Birth of the Gloryhole

    The sex between men who would frequent a cottage would usually be anonymous. Gloryholes, a hole drilled between stalls in public toilets became a way in which this sex could remain faceless.

    To this day there are loads of cottages and cruising grounds in Nottingham, two of the most popular are the Arboretum and the Forest Recreation Ground.

    Cottaging and cruising etiquette

    Generally speaking, not a lot of talking goes on when cruising. A series of looks and gestures would let others know what you were up to. At urinals, guys would stand, playing with themselves subtly to let others know that they were up for some play. Then if the feeling is mutual the pair could make their way to a cubicle for more privacy.

    At cruising grounds, much of the same would happen, except the action took place away from public footpaths.

    Is Cottaging Ilegal in the UK?

    Cottaging is illegal in the United Kingdom under the Sexual Offences Act 2003 and applies to both heterosexual and homosexual acts.

    The Sexual Offences Act 2003 doesn’t say however that sex in a public place is illegal. Cruising grounds and cottaging are two different spaces. Cruising grounds are defined as open spaces, where men can hook up with men, or straight couples can meet for sex (often referred to as dogging), as long as no members of the public can see you.

    You risk being arrested if reported by a member of the public. If this happens you have the right to legal advice from an on-duty solicitor at the police station. If convicted you could be sentenced to 6 months in prison and /or a fine.

  • Are there gay cruising grounds in Aberdeen?

    Are there gay cruising grounds in Aberdeen?

    Whether you love or loathe the idea of anonymous outdoor gay sex, it’s hard to escape the fact that gay cruising grounds are all around us.

    You probably don’t even know, but from where you’re sitting or standing right now there’s probably a cruising or dogging ground just metres away from you in Aberdeen, and they’re a hangover from more homophobic times in the UK.

    Gay cruising is not a new phenomenon. It dates back to when sex between men was illegal in the UK. Finding a place where two men could be intimate with each other without too many questions being raised was tricky until it was realised that men’s public toilets were a perfect place.

    These were named cottages because they actually used to look like quaint little cottages.

    The act of finding sex in these public conveniences became known as “cottaging“.

    The sex between men who would frequent a cottage would usually be anonymous. Gloryholes, a hole drilled between stalls in public toilets became a way in which this sex could remain faceless.

    To this day there are loads of cottages and cruising grounds in Aberdeen and in wider Aberdeenshire.

    Cottaging and cruising etiquette

    Generally speaking, not a lot of talking goes on when cruising. A series of looks and gestures would let others know what you were up to. At urinals, guys would stand, playing with themselves subtly to let others know that they were up for some play. Then if the feeling is mutual the pair could make their way to a cubicle for more privacy.

    At cruising grounds, much of the same would happen, except the action took place away from public footpaths.

    Is Cottaging Ilegal in the UK?

    Cottaging is illegal in the United Kingdom under the Sexual Offences Act 2003 and applies to both heterosexual and homosexual acts.

    The Sexual Offences Act 2003 doesn’t say however that sex in a public place is illegal. Cruising grounds and cottaging are two different spaces. Cruising grounds are defined as open spaces, where men can hook up with men, or straight couples can meet for sex (often referred to as dogging), as long as no members of the public can see you.

    You risk being arrested if reported by a member of the public. If this happens you have the right to legal advice from an on-duty solicitor at the police station. If convicted you could be sentenced to 6 months in prison and /or a fine.