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  • Team Elton: Why D&G Should Take Responsibility for Their “Personal Views”

    They say that fashion has a tendency to cycle and repeat itself. Fashion virtuosos Domenico Dolce and Stefano Gabbana seem to follow this fashion rule of thumb by trying to reintroduce the trend of heteronormativity back in vogue.

    Famous for their bold fashion vision, this season Dolce and Gabbana take an even bolder approach: influenced by traditional family values the Italian duo now appear to assume the roles of conservative moralists, while seemingly drawing their inspiration from ‘before the Stonewall’ and other pre-sexual revolution eras, the duo fiercely presented their slightly tailored, but certainly more edgy, new collection of anti-gay attitudes (negative remarks towards gay marriage and adoption were made by D&G in 2006 and 2013) for Italian news magazine Panorama. Here are some highlights:

    “The only family is the traditional one. No chemical offsprings and rented uterus: life has a natural flow, there are things that should not be changed.”

    “synthetic children [children conceived via egg donors or artificial insemination]”

    “The family is not a fad. In it there is a supernatural sense of belonging.”

    Even though Dolce and Gabbana later pleaded that anti-gay parenting comments made were just an opinion, this way trying to clarify IVF remarks that had incited a global outrage, the remarks, nevertheless, made by such well-known public figures inevitably pose a threat to LGBT community and their rights.

    First and foremost, Dolce’s and Gabbana’s anti-same sex parenting comments increase social stigma against LGBT families and parenting. It does so by propagating an idea that “the only family is the traditional one”, which in turn helps to reinforce conservative and old Christian beliefs that marital relations are only fitting between the people of opposite sexes and any other families that do not fit this model are incomplete, unnatural or not ‘real’ families. Needless to say, such view is very much in accord with those views of opponents of the same-sex families and, hence, is based on a widespread heterosexist assumption that a child needs both a mother and a father in order to form a ‘healthy’ identity. Although various studies conducted on child development suggest otherwise (APA; Pediatrics; CPA), it is not the goal of this piece to prove how wrong Dolce and Gabbana are, but rather to point out the potential damage their comments may cause for the LGBT community.

    With this in mind, while anti-gay parenting statements made by Dolce and Gabbana compliment the prejudice against LGBT parenting, another destructive consequence of the designers’ negative statements is that it helps to supply anti-gay politicians and activists with the ‘new’ anti-gay opinions coming from the prominent LGBT figures. Such opinions coming from LGBT insiders, hence, strengthen anti-gay activists’ ammunition to attack LGBT citizens’ rights for parenthood. For instance, a remark that “the family is not a fad” implies that those homosexuals who want to form a family want to do so because it is fashionable and that such desire is not serious and, subsequently, must be short-lived. Such generalisation then indicates that according to Dolce and Gabbana’s view homosexual parents are lacking parental competence and therefore are inferior parents in comparison to heterosexual parents.

    In addition, social media quarrel between Sir Elton John and Dolce and Gabbana points out a dichotomy between LGBT members regarding the issue of the same-sex parenting: more precisely, between those LGBT members who are in favour of the same-sex parenting and those who are not. In other words, remarks made by Dolce and Gabbana bring the disagreement existing within LGBT community regarding LGBT rights for parenthood to light. This disagreement, as a result, strengthens anti-gay politicians’ and activists’ argument that the same-sex couples are yet not fit to raise children, this way jeopardising parenting rights of those LGBT members who are capable and ready to raise children.

    Last, but certainly not least, Dolce and Gabbana’s remarks are pure discrimination of LGBT community, their children and all children conceived by IVF in general. To begin with the discrimination of LGBT community, the statements, such as: “The only family is the traditional one”; “life has a natural flow” and that “there are things that should not be changed” suggest that a family is exclusively heterosexual privilege rather than a human right.

    Therefore, by supporting traditional family values Dolce and Gabbana implicitly justify discrimination against homosexual peoples’ civil right to form a family. In turn, by justifying discrimination against LGBT people, the designers support the denial of humanity, the denial of equal dignity and worth, as well as the treatment of LGBT community as second class citizens.

    Finally, calling children “synthetic” or “chemical” because they were conceived via egg donors or artificial insemination shows that Dolce and Gabbana differentiate children and, hence, do they consider children conceived biologically as much more superior then their artificially conceived counterparts? Ultimately, it goes without saying that calling children “synthetic” or “chemical” is dehumanisation of children conceived artificially, not to mention that such remarks are simply mean and degrading.

    In the end, while responding to the uproar and trying to clarify their IVF remarks through the news and social media, Dolce and Gabbana explained that the comments made are just a personal opinion; for example, in an interview with CNN the duo said that they respect how people chose to live their lives, later adding that others should also respect differences in opinion.

    Indeed, everyone has a right to express their views and opinions. Yet, when one’s opinion is so disrespectful, degrading and has a potential to harm the other’s civil rights, such opinion is certainly not worthy of respect. In fact, it is worth of strong counter-reaction and criticism. Perhaps even a boycott…

    It is not a first time that Dolce and Gabbana make negative statements. For instance, in 2006, Gabbana told The Daily Mail that he is “opposed” to the idea of same-sex parents raising a child. Similarly, in 2013, when asked if they had ever intended to marry, Dolce told The Telegraph that he “doesn’t believe” in gay marriage.

    Opinions expressed in this article may not reflect those of THEGAYUK, it’s management or editorial teams. If you’d like to comment or write a comment, opinion or blog piece, please click here.

  • Green Party Launches The Green Gay Manifesto, “Much Work To Be Done”

    Green Party leader Natalie Bennett is to launch the Greens’ LGBT+ manifesto today at 3:30 on Old Compton Street, London’s gay centre.

    Natalie Bennett, Leader of the Green Party of England and Wales, will be campaigning in Soho in with deputy leader Amelia Womack and leading LGBTIQ campaigner Peter Tatchell. They will talk to voters as the Green Party launches their LGBT+ manifesto.

    The manifesto contains pledges to

    • Review the discriminatory blood ban

    • Introduce LGBTIQ-inclusive sex education

    • Protect LGBTIQ asylum seekers

    • Improve services for trans people

    • Promote LGBTIQ rights abroad

    Bennett who will be releasing the full manifesto at 3:30 is expected to say,

    “The Green Party has consistently been at the forefront of pushing for LGBTIQ rights.

    “We were the first UK party to support marriage equality and in parliament, Caroline has pushed for a review of the discriminatory ban on gay blood donors, wider provision of gender identity clinics and an end to the transphobic spousal veto.

    “However, there is much still to be done. Homophobia, biphobia and transphobia remain too common in our society. Green MPs will work with others to ensure that LGBTIQ rights are enhanced over the course of the next parliament.”

    The Green Party is polling at record levels ahead of a General Election. Membership of the Green Party, the third largest party in England and Wales, sky-rocketed by 123% in 2014 and continues to surge in 2015. The combined membership of UK Green parties now stands at over 70,000.

    The Green Party is standing candidates in over 90% of seats, meaning more people than ever before will be able to vote Green on May 7th 2015

  • FILM REVIEW | Beyond The Walls

    ★★★★★ | Beyond The Walls

    This unexpected and rather remarkable film from first-time writer/director David Lambert realistically scrutinises the intimate details of the rise and fall of an edgy gay relationship, devoid of stereotypes.

    It premiered at Cannes Film Festival during the Critics’ Week (picking up an award) and most of the reviewers then made a point of commenting that after Andrew Haigh’s very successful Weekend and Ira Sachs’ Keep The Lights On that there is a now a new movement of realism in gay cinema. And very refreshing it is too.

    Drinking rather heavily in a Brussels’ bar one night, Paolo a young slim youth catches the eye of Illir a hunky bearded Albanian bartender and ends up waking in his bed next morning. Bisexual Paolo slinks back to his girlfriend but she eventually throws him out two days later, and Paolo now homeless, persuades Illir to put him up even though the barman knows that shacking up together after just a couple of dates is not a good idea.

    However thrown together, love blossoms between the inexperienced young man and his ‘daddy’ figure boyfriend and everything is going really well until Illir, a part-time musician leaves town for a gig and ends up being arrested and jailed for possessing hash and resisting arrest. The clingy dependent Paolo is distraught and makes every visit to jail emotionally explosive, and Illir conscious of the tough guy image he wants to maintain in front of his cellmates, tells him never to return again.

    Paolo eventually hooks up with an older successful businessman who he clearly doesn’t love, but the relationship empowers him to mature and find his own sense of worth. Halfway through Illir’s jail sentence, Paolo is still willing to jeopardise his own freedom by smuggling in some hash, but later by the time Illir is eventually freed, Paolo can resist Illir even though he is obviously still in love with him.

    Like both Weekend and Keep The Lights On there is no fairytale ending where everyone lives happily after: it is what it is. The relationship reaches giddy heights but both men in their different ways accept that it has run its course and that they cannot turn the clock back.

    The story dips a tad in the later part losing the excellent pace that it started out with, and although by no means a perfect film it has much too highly recommend it. ‘Realism’ does not mean gloomy and Lambert obviously has a keen sense of humor and has written a couple of funny and affectionate scenes like when the normally closeted Illir grabs the microphone in the supermarket to ask anyone if they could point out the condoms so that he and his boyfriend could have a good afternoon making out. Plus there are the two lead actors Guilluame Gouix and Matila Malliarakis who are perfectly cast to add to the rawness of the piece. Well photographed too.

    We’re giving this a high rating because not only is this a refreshingly enchanting heart-warming movie from this newbie Belgian filmmaker, but it strives (and succeeds) to help break the mould and not make this very real story into the usual frothy lightweight gay movie.

  • FILM REVIEW | Broken Gardenias

    ★ | Broken Gardenias

    Jenni is a misfit and a nerd. She is so clumsy that she breaks most of the plant pots at the nursery where she works and that really annoys her boss.

    Her self-absorbed roommates all but one ignore her, and she is totally friendless. It gets even worse after she is hospitalised and loses both her job and her home. Clutching one cardboard box of her worldly possessions she makes tracks to the nearest park and sets about hanging herself from a tree.

    Even this does not go to plan as she is cut down and rescued by Sam (short for Samantha) a feisty lesbian with a buzz cut and ripped jeans and a great big grin. ‘This’ she tells a downcast Jenni ‘is the face of a nice person’. Something she feels the need to point out after listening to the miserable girl pour out her tale of woe as it seems likely that she has never encountered a nice person ever before in her life.

    Part of the story is Jenni’s father who she hasn’t seen since she was brought to the city and dumped there when she was very little. He is still in Los Angeles. Maybe. Jenni is very sketchy about details, but that doesn’t deter Sam who declares that they will set off for LA in search of him immediately. Even the fact they do not have a car, or even the faintest idea where in the vast city he will be is considered irrelevant by the overly optimistic Sam.

    Their road trip is littered with characters that Sam just shrugs off, but which wind up Jenni even more. When they arrive in the city and the search for the father starts, Sam has a detour when she runs into an old fling who invites her… and Jenni… to a wild party. Whilst Sam goes off to make out with her ex, wide-eyed Jenni ends up tripping on a psychedelic cupcake and getting into some bedroom action that she didn’t didn’t count on. She freaks out and then as she has angered the owner of the house as well, runs off into the city and is really on her own now. The question is will she survive, and will she find her father? Even more important will we have lost interest just like Sam does?

    Broken Gardenias is billed as a dark comedy and is the work of first-time director Kai Alexander whose bio states that he spent his childhood with his parents who were part of a travelling circus which may account for the bizarre roster of characters the two women encounter. The script is by newbie writer Alma S. Grey who also plays Jenni.

    The sole bright spot of this film is the performance of Ashley Morocco as the bubbly Sam as asides from this the movie just simply fails to really engage, and for a comedy, it is painfully unfunny.

  • FILM REVIEW | Glassland

    When John is not goofing off with his best friend Shane, he is driving his taxi around some of the seedier downtrodden neighbourhoods on the fringes of Dublin looking for fares. ★★★★

    Pickings are slim and he pleads with his boss to give him more shifts to make ends meet. He needs the money to support himself and Jean his alcoholic mother who seems determined to drink herself to an early grave.

    On the rare times she is sober she is vivacious and funny, but when she is wasted, Jean changes into a mean and nasty drunk. So much so that John videos one of her drink-fuelled tirades to play it back to show her what she turns into. Coming home to find her passed out is a regular occurrence, but on this occasion when he discovers her lying lifeless in a pool of her vomit he rushes her to the hospital ER. The doctor breaks the news that Jean desperate needs a new kidney, but if she doesn’t get her drinking in check immediately, she probably won’t last long enough to even have a transplant.

    If that is not enough for John to deal with, he also has to take sole responsibility for his younger sibling Kit who has Down’s syndrome, as Jean refuses to even acknowledge his very existence, let alone attend his 18th birthday. He does however finally manage to get Jean to an AA meeting but he discovers what she really needs is a proper detox programme that will cost £8000. No amount of driving hookers around looking for their ‘johns’ in his cab will raise an amount as large as this, so he is forced to borrow it from an unlikely source.

    He is actually handed the money by a person on a horse who passes him a tin full of money. We find later that the price he will have to pay for this is something to do with the activities of the criminal clique who lent it to him, but what this actually is as clear as mud and is open to wild guesswork. There is a clue in the naked dead woman he discovers in the bath in a deserted country house he has been sent too, but we are never sure why.

    Saying that this powerful Irish kitchen-sink drama is completely gripping from the word go. It has an impressive performance from Irish actor Jack Reynor as John that got him a Best Acting Award at Sundance earlier this year. Playing his mother quite superbly is Toni Collete who is pitch perfect as a deeply unhappy woman who seems almost happy to drink herself into oblivion. A nod to Harry Nagle a young actor for his bravado ad Kit.

    Confusing but quite compelling.

  • Steve Grand Has Really Got Something Worth Baring All For

    Gay singer-songwriter Steve Grand who became a star overnight last year when his first video went viral, stopped by vlogger Davey Wavey’s house to do some real musical promotion for his new album.

    So far a lot of the promotion that he receives is not for his music, but for his looks, so he wanted this to be different. It was until Davey literally got his hands on him.

     

     

     

  • FILM REVIEW: Elsa And Fred

    FILM REVIEW: Elsa And Fred

    ★★★★ ELSA AND FRED | Newly widowed Fred has been coerced by his control freak of a daughter to sell his large house and move into an apartment in New Orleans.

    (more…)

  • GARDEN | April gardening tips – It Is all kicking off

    Here we go fellow gardeners. April is the month when there’s no looking back!

    Ever since Andy and I began keeping bees we’ve been super aware of which plants flower at which time of year. Nature is a clever mistress and bees are provided with different flowers to feast on throughout the year.

    Our bees have just begun to stir on warm days are finding food from flowering trees, daffodils and the bright yellow flowers of the local gauze bushes

    April showers

    Rain and sun. The perfect combination for growing plants. April is the month to get sowing a huge variety of seeds. Many can be sown straight outdoors now. I usually find the mixture of wet and warm weather this month gets seedling off to a great start – but be aware of late frosts and dry spells.

    If you’ve been sowing seeds indoors over the last few months you will have some small plants ready for the great outdoors. On warm days put them outside and bring them in overnight. This is called ‘hardening off’ and will save your young plants from the shock of being put straight outside.

    Sweetie Darling

    April is your last chance to sow sweet peas. These annuals are hugely popular with gardeners of all abilities as they are easy, colourful and wonderfully scented. We usually plant them in specially made baskets with support sticks built in. As they grow we just help guide them onto the framework for stunning results.

    Sow your seeds in fertile, well drained soil mixed with seed compost. Put your pots out in an area of full sun and watch them go! Pick flowers throughout the summer for fragrant and beautiful table decorations.

    Off with their heads!

    Now’s the time to start deadheading. The process of deadheading not only keeps your garden looking fresh and vibrant but keeps your plants producing more flowers for longer.

    Have a go now at pansies, primulas and any other spring flowering plants.

    And so to bed

    Keep an eye on your flower beds. April is a great time to feed and top up with compost to give your borders a boost. Now is also the time to start checking your borders for any plants that are thriving a little too much. Flower beds are about balance so make sure nothing is getting out of control and smothering smaller, later blooming plants.

    Also it’s time to start weeding! Everyone’s favourite job. As with most things in life, a little bit everyday will work wonders. Stick on the radio and try and dedicate a bit of time to tidying up your beds. It will transform your garden and keep your flowers looking gorgeous.

     

    So there we have it – a few tit bits to help you out this month. If you’ve never grown anything before, April is definitely the month to get started. Results are fast and impressive – boosting your confidence as a gardener straight away. Try a few pots this year and see how you get on.

     

    Enjoy!

     

    Adam and Andy are writers and smallholders making a living in the Welsh countryside. @AndyandAdams – Facebook ‘Andy and Adam’s’ – www.andyandadam.co.uk

  • ADVICE | I Had An Unprotected Blowjob: Can I get HIV?

    ADVICE | I Had An Unprotected Blowjob: Can I get HIV?

    A young reader asks if he can catch HIV from a quick blowjob from an ex.

    (C) BIGSTOCK

    Dear TGUK
    Me and a former boyfriend had partial sex several months ago. We performed hand jobs on one another and he gave me a blowjob. The blowjob wasn’t long (only four sucks) and I didn’t cum. However, as a hypochondriac I’m concerned about HIV. Prior to sex I asked him if he had sex before. He had sex only once in the past and it was only mutual masturbation and fellatio. My parents won’t let me take a test because it would worsen my health anxiety. But should I be worried?

    Joe 16,

    Hello Joe

    Thank you for writing to us with your worries, it sounds as though you had a very low-risk encounter with your ex. Oral sex is considered a low-risk activity for catching HIV, especially if you’re on the receiving end of the BJ. However it’s not just HIV that you have to consider here. Other nasties like Chlamydia and Gonorrhoea can be passed on by both receiver and giver, and might not even show symptoms, however all these infections can be treated effectively, if caught soon enough.

    If you are worried you should make an appointment to go to a clinic, or just pop along to a walk-in clinic. There are some amazing services – and now, there’s even an online clinic called S24, where you can take tests at home and have the results sent to your mobile phone, Google it.

    If your parents are standing in your way of getting a health check maybe you need to have a conversation with them about your worries, however at 16 you can go to a clinic by yourself you have the right to be treated confidentially.

    Hand-jobs and mutual masturbation are very safe activities, as long as you keep bodily fluids such as semen away from open cuts or sores. If you’re worried in future you can use condoms during oral, and there are even flavoured ones to try.

    Visiting a sex health clinic is an important part of life, taking responsibility for your health and for others you’re having sex with. Making regular visits every six months to once a year is suggested if you’re sexually active.

    So don’t delay and more importantly try not to worry yourself too much.

    Did you know you can order an at-home HIV test online? Click here to buy one

     

    OTHER QUESTIONS: HIV | WILLY WONDERS | HOLES | DOING IT | STIs | LUMPS & BUMPS | BACK TO SEX CLINIC HOME PAGE

    The advice given in this article is for guidance only and you should always seek your own independent, professional medical advice from your own GP if you are concerned about your health.  

    Got a problem you’d like advice on?

  • COMMENT | The Trans Battleground

    Is the battle for transexual equality over? Ten years on from the Gender Recognition Act, TheGayUK’s legal experts look at how the law is protecting or not, the transgender community.

    This April, the LGBT community and their supporters will celebrate the ten year anniversary of the Gender Recognition Act 2004. This landmark law gave the trans community the ability to be legally classified by their chosen gender, i.e. to obtain a new birth certificate recognising that person as being a man or a woman (known as a “Gender Recognition Certificate”). The test was whether the person in question suffered from gender dysphoria (i.e. severe discomfort with one’s biological sex) and had lived as their chosen gender for two years.

    Until December of last year there was a quirk in the law, which meant that any married person who wished to obtain a Gender Recognition Certificate had to divorce their spouse if they wished to have their gender recognised. However, thanks to gay marriage, that quirk has now been removed.

    Yet more good news came in the intervening 10 years, in the form of the Equality Act 2010. This act means it is now unlawful for a person to discriminate someone for being (among other things) trans. The definition for trans is whether someone has undergone, is undergoing or is proposing to undergo a process “for the purpose of reassigning the person’s sex by changing physiological or other attributes of sex”. This means it protects trans people both before and after the operation, but not people who are happy with their biological sex but prefer to dress as the opposite.

    But we are not there yet.

    Alarming figures from the Home Office show that in 2014 there were over 550 hate crimes perpetrated against the trans community. This mightn’t seem like a lot, but it represents around a quarter of the trans community in the UK (based on the 2009 figure of how many Gender Recognition Certificate had been issued). What is of further concern is that the gap between the social acceptance of LGB people and trans people is widening. There is a danger of trans people being “left behind”, losing some of the unity that previously aligned their cause with that of the LGB community.

     

    So whilst on the statute books the battle against inequality and prejudice has apparently been won, in the hearts and minds of many, trans rights are irrelevant or even abhorrent. It is up to all of us to continue to show solidarity in the fight for equality so that the abbreviation remains LGBT, not LGB and T.

    Have you got a question for our legal team? Check out our legal pages here

     

    Charles Irvine is a barrister at 1 Gray’s Inn Square; David Peachey is a barrister at Enterprise Chambers. Both practice in the area of trusts of the home, inheritance and property law. Special thanks to Phillipa Woodrow, pupil barrister at 1 Gray’s Inn Square, who helped research this article.

     

    Opinions expressed in this article may not reflect those of THEGAYUK, its management or editorial teams. If you’d like to comment or write a comment, opinion or blog piece, please click here.

  • FILM REVIEW | The Last Five Years

    ★★★★| The Last Five Years

    The Last Five Years is a rare breed. It is an (off) Broadway Hit Musical that has been very successfully adapted as a movie and avoided the disastrous transition from stage to screen that usually ruins most of Broadway’s exports.

    The simple story explores a five-year relationship between Cathy, a struggling actress, and her boyfriend Jamie who is a new novelist destined for big things. The show bravely tells Cathy’s story starting at the end of their marriage and working backwards, whereas Jamie’s is told in chronological order.

    With very little dialogue this two-hander is a series of songs with the couple singing to each other about their romance as it takes off and then falls apart, and in fact there is only one number in the middle of the movie when they sing a duet. So Cathy starts with her sad lament Jamie it’s Over’whereas Jamie’s exuberant first song Shiksa Goddess is about when they first meet and he totally falls in love with her and declares she can be anything, but preferably not Jewish as his Orthodox family had pressured him for years.

    As the title gives away the young couple meet, fall in love, marry and then part all in five years. Cathy gets stuck midway doing Summer Stock Theater in Ohio (!) whilst Jamie’s literary success makes him the toast of Manhattan. Evidently so closer based on composer Tony Award Winner James Robert Brown’s own life that he had to change one of the original songs after his actress ex-wife threatened legal action.

    It is completely enchanting and although sometimes the songs are a tad more passionate than the actual relationship, the infectious score and the very witty lyrics make this movie such a sheer delight. Credit too for a rather wonderful performance from rising star Anna Kendrick who showed in Into The Woods recently that she can sing as well as she can act. She is teamed with handsome Jeremy Jordan (from TV’s Smash) who is obviously a seasoned musical performer.

    The original stage show was first produced in Chicago in 2002 before setting in off-Broadway and picking up a few Awards. It has aged well with time, and this movie adaption from director Richard LaGravanse (‘PS I Love You’) will appeal to people beyond the usual musical aficionados.

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