Dr Gemma Commane, lecturer in Media and Communication at Birmingham City University, says it’s important to question what this Dancing On Ice on a same-sex couple introduction change really means and the conversations it will create.
OPINION | Lesbians are often overlooked or are subject to ‘tragic’ storylines and they are given less space to occupy.
“Although it’s timely for Dancing On Ice to have a same-sex couple, it’s important to understand that decisions are political and have economic reasons,” said Dr Commane.
“In this case, examples could be sustainability for the television show, maintenance of the brand and audience expectations.
“We need to carefully think about what privilege means and what privilege looks like. Privilege is complex and it does not simply connect to one aspect of a person’s identity.
“Whilst it is fantastic that changes are happening, we need to ask: what do these ‘changes’ actually mean when certain voices and identities are still rendered invisible?
“Lesbians are often overlooked or are subject to ‘tragic’ storylines and they are given less space to occupy, especially in primetime television. Why aren’t lesbians the default when it comes to ‘ground breaking’ decisions when introducing same-sex coupling in shows like Dancing On Ice?
“What would it mean for ‘Dancing On Ice’ to have a lesbian celebrity skating with a same-sex partner?
“What types of conversations would arise from the media and audiences around this selection? If this had been the case, it would have been interesting to observe how news organisations would respond to an announcement like this and if they would write about the lesbian celebrity in predictable and fetishistic ways.”
Kate and Rebecca tied the knot in one of the UK’s most unsual venues, the longest, deepest and highest canal tunnels in Britain.
(C) Laura Rhian
The historic tunnel and visitor centre, which is owned by waterways and wellbeing charity the Canal & River Trust, is set in a picturesque location on the edge of the Peak District National Park just outside Huddersfield in West Yorkshire and was the stunning setting for the marriage of Kate Stephenson and Rebecca (Becks) Errett, both of Holmfirth.
The couple, who share the same birthday and are both 36 years old, decided to tie the knot at Standedge’s Visitor Centre after viewing a number of other Yorkshire locations and deciding that the iconic tunnel was the ideal place for them.
With the wedding date being right in the heart of the festive season, the happy couple gave their ceremony, wedding breakfast and party a Christmas theme, complete with a carol-singing choir, Christmas trees, fairy lights and a meal on sharing platters to mimic the traditional Christmas Day lunch, while guests danced late in to the night.
While not originally hailing from Yorkshire, Kate and Rebecca have long roots in the county having met 17 years ago while reading for a degree in performance design and production at the now defunct Bretton Hall College of Education, the Grade II listed former manor house that is now being developed into a luxury hotel within the Yorkshire Sculpture Park.
The couple met on the second day of the course and have been together ever since, while the wedding proposal from Becks to Kate came in a novel way at a breakout room game in Liverpool where the ring was hidden in the last puzzle.
Kate Stephenson said, “We were looking for a venue that could host the ceremony and wedding breakfast in one location, but also somewhere that was typically Yorkshire in its essence and combined a rustic feel with some industrial heritage. We looked at many different locations but as soon as we set foot in Standedge we both realised it was our dream venue. Those dreams came true in the most amazing way. We’d like to thank all the Standedge staff who helped make it such as special day.”
Iain Weston of the Canal & River Trust which manages the Standedge site said, “We are delighted to have hosted the first same-sex wedding at Standedge Tunnel and to be part of Kate and Becks’ special Christmas present to each other. We would like to wish them many congratulations and much happiness in the future.”
Standedge Tunnel, which dates from 1811 and stretches for more than 5km (3 miles) from Marsden in West Yorkshire to Diggle in Greater Manchester, was licensed to host wedding ceremonies in August 2017. Weddings take place in the fabulous Thomas Bourne Room which has exposed bricks, cast-iron columns and a wood-beamed ceiling. Large bright windows overlook the Huddersfield Narrow Canal and couples can arrive or depart by barge. The room holds up to 200 people. Find out more click here
The digital first 2021 Census will help shape public services to meet the needs of the LGBT+ community in the years to come, as plans set out in a government white paper today show.
The Office for National Statistics (ONS) has recommended a new voluntary question on sexual orientation for those aged 16 and over. In addition to the usual question on being male or female for all ages, there will also be a voluntary question on gender identity in England and Wales for those aged over 16.
It was always the intention of ONS that these questions would be voluntary.
The data gathered from these questions will make it easier to monitor inequalities under the anti-discrimination duties of the Equality Act 2010 and to directly plan public services and support for these groups.
“Stand Up and Be Counted”
National Statistician, John Pullinger, said: “The Census is for everyone; it gives us all the opportunity to stand up and be counted in democratic debate and policy decisions.
“We have designed it with people at its heart and we consulted widely to ensure it meets the needs of society. Unlike previous Censuses, it will be digital first which will make it easier to complete electronically, with help available for those who need it.”
The date for the digital-first census has been confirmed as 21 March 2021, subject to parliamentary approval.
Information gathered by ONS will ensure vital public services can be targeted into communities and groups where they are needed, in 2021 and beyond.
ONS is transforming the way it collects, processes and shares data and the next census is part of a wider drive towards making more use of data already held and moving surveys online.
In line with previous censuses, ONS will hold a census rehearsal in October 2019 and is currently reviewing which local authority areas will be included.
For more information, see the white paper which has been laid today in Parliament.
How many LGBT people are there in the UK?
(C) BIGSTOCK
The number of people who identify as lesbian, gay and bisexual is a hotly debated subject, with no clear answer, but here will look at all the available stats.
There has long been a widely-held belief that around 10 per cent of the population is gay, lesbian or bisexual or who identify as non-heterosexual. This is probably the most accurate of all the figures – as more and more people feel comfortable to come out about their sexuality.
The ONS (Office of National Statistics) says that in a survey of people in the United Kingdom it found that 1.5 per cent of people identified as LGB. This result was arrived at by extrapolation of data collected. However, these statistics were disputed for not being accurate or showing the full picture.
By their estimations, this would mean that there are only 990,300 LGB people in the UK.
For the first time in the tree’s history, 2018’s tree was donated by a lesbian couple.
(C) ROCKEFELLER CENTER BLOG
The first ever tree to be lit at the Rockefeller Center in New York was in 1931. The lighting of the tree tradition became in 1933. This year’s tree was donated by Shirley Figueroa and Lissette Gutierrez.
New Yorkers for Parks noted on its official Twitter account that “This year, Rockefeller Center’s tree is from a woman who grew up on a block in the Bronx that had no trees! It’s also the first tree in Rockefeller Center’s history to be donated by a same-sex or Latina couple!”
This year, Rockefeller Center’s tree is from a woman who grew up on a block in the Bronx that had no trees! It’s also the first tree in Rockefeller Center’s history to be donated by a same-sex or Latina couple! The tree will be lit tonight at 7PM! https://t.co/gg3FzE3cY0
According to the Rockefeller Centre, “Growing up, Figueroa loved seeing people from all “different cultures and backgrounds” visiting Rockefeller Center at Christmastime, so she’s grateful to help continue that tradition, especially for the kids who come from all over the city to enjoy it”.
Millions of people are expected to turn up to see the 75-year-old tree during the festive period and it will be lit with over 50,000 LED lights and topped by a 9 foot wide Swarovski crystal star.
She’s the fearless know-it-all from the game show, The Chase, but it seems as though she’s got a lot of female admirers. So is Anne a lesbian or bisexual?
The Chase star is often chased after by women on social media, but she has to let them down gently. Anne isn’t or doesn’t identify as a lesbian.
Anne Hegerty, also known as the Governess on the game show, The Chase, might just be the runaway success in this year’s I’m A Celeb, but who is she and more importantly people want to know if she’s dating anyone or married. The fearless, 60-year-old, it seems, gets a lot of attention from other women on social media.
Is Anne Hegerty gay or a lesbian?
No, Anne does not identify as a lesbian. In fact she’s quipped that people think that she is, but she isn’t, but that doesn’t stop other lesbians from chatting her up. However Anne takes it all in her stride and tells the women that their “gaydar” is broken and that she’s very “flattered”.
She said, “The awkward thing is I do quite often get lots of flirty Twitter messages from women.
“I have to say to them I’m very flattered, but at the same time your gaydar is broken.
“Quite often they say yes I didn’t think you were, just thought I’d try my luck.”
The Chase superstar star takes her icon status with grace saying, “It’s nice to be a gay icon and a lesbian icon.
Is Anne Hegerty married?
She also currently single, although there is a persistent internet rumour, she says, that she’s married to someone called Jack Hester. She says, she tried and “given up” trying to correct the falsehood.
Anne has also admitted that she finds relationships difficult because of her Asperger syndrome, she says that she can find relationships “a struggle”.
Over the weekend, Pride In London’s parade was interrupted by a protest group, Get The L Out. Who are they and what do they stand for?
Get The L Out is a fringe lesbian and feminist protest group which previously called for transgender people to be removed from the LGBT acronym. The petition was ultimately unsuccessful and now they are petitioning to have the “L” removed from LGBT+. The petition was signed by just 310 people. They say that lesbians are being “silenced and threatened” and claim that all women and girls are “at risk” and their interests are taking a backseat to the transgender community.
Over the weekend around eight to ten women stopped the Pride In London march and lay on the ground after being asked by organisers to move on. When they wouldn’t organisers decided to allow the group to march but at the front, well ahead of the official starting line of the parade, leaving enough gap as to ensure that the group would not be legitimised by walking behind the rainbow flag.
The group also makes the claim that publications slur lesbians by using the word “terf” and “cis”.
Terf stands for Trans-Exclusionary Radical Feminist. Cisgendered people are those whose outward gender expression matches the sex they were assigned at birth by their parents and medical professions.
Anti-trans?
The protest was strongly condemned by Pride In London who said that the group had shown “a level of bigotry, ignorance and hate that is unacceptable”. They also said that the group was not a registered parade group. The statement also went on to say that Pride In London “reject what this group stands for. They do not share our values, which are about inclusion and respect and support for the most marginalised parts of our community”.
GTLO says that they,”believe that lesbian rights are under attack by the trans movement and we encourage lesbians everywhere to leave the LGBT and form their own independent movement, as well as to be vocal and take action against the proposed changes to the General Recognition Act”.
Chrys Jordan helpfully added, “If you are a woman who likes other women, you can call yourself a gay woman or a lesbian, or both.”
Lily added, “You can absolutely say you’re gay. That’s your choice and I think we all know what gay means. It’s about what you think and feel about yourself.”
What does Lesbian mean?
The dictionary defines Lesbian as a “homosexual woman”. The late 19th-century-word “lesbian” originates from the Greek word, Lesbios from Lesbos, which was the home of Sappho, who wrote poetry about her affection for other women.
Lesbian when used as an adjective about the people of Lesbos, describes someone from the island of Lesbos.
GLAAD defines the term lesbian as, “A woman whose enduring physical, romantic, and/or emotional attraction is to other women. Some lesbians may prefer to identify as gay (adj.) or as gay women”.
We asked readers of THEGAYUK.com on Twitter for their reaction… Here are the results:
We saw this thread, https://t.co/vbhrTLf1vn … about the label “Gay” Woman over “Lesbian”… So we’re interested to know which do you prefer – #Lesbian or #GayWoman?
“She was my love, my heart, my best friend, my teacher”
The author of Eat, Pray Love has paid a moving tribute to her partner, Rayya Elias after she died of pancreatic cancer.
Taking to Instagram she wrote, “She was my love, my heart, my best friend, my teacher, my rebel, my angel, my protector, my challenger, my partner, my muse, my wizard, my surprise, my gift, my comet, my liberator, my rock star, my completely impossible non-cooperator, my otherworldly visitor, my spiritual portal, and my baby. I loved you so much”.
The couple had been partners since the spring of 2016, following from Gilbert leaving her husband.
The women had been best friends for over a decade, but it was Rayya’s diagnosis of pancreatic cancer that made the author realise that she was romantically attracted to her friend in the spring of 2016.
Lisa and Hayley, despite being married live 10,000 miles apart, due to a family tragedy, British Airways did something amazing for them.
Hayley and Lisa
British Airways, told us,
Lisa wrote into the airline’s BA Magic campaign to tell their story. She explained the couple had met in Australia in 2011 and moved together to the UK in 2012. Just before Hayley’s 30th birthday, Lisa took her to Paris and proposed. Hayley said yes, and the pair married in a beautiful ceremony in Derby surrounded by friends and family in August 2015.
The only people that couldn’t be there were Hayley’s mother, Debbie and father, Steve. Steve was recovering from Stage 4 tongue cancer and Debbie has the degenerative condition, Muscular Dystrophy, so the journey was just too much. They were there thanks to Facetime technology though, with Steve delivering a very proud father-of-the-bride speech.
The happy couple moved to Glasgow, where Lisa started her dream job as a police officer in one of the city’s most deprived areas, while Hayley pursued her passion, establishing herself as a blogger and vlogger of all things vintage.
Sadly their happy bubble burst just a year-and-a-half later when Hayley received the devastating news that Steve’s cancer had returned and was now terminal.
On Valentine’s Day this year, she rushed back to Australia leaving Lisa, their beloved pet dog, Hettie and all her friends behind in the UK.
Steve died peacefully with Hayley by his side on March 26.
Hayley has been in Australia ever since, helping her Mum sort through her Dad’s affairs and assisting her Mum through her own condition. Lisa and Hettie have moved back to Lisa’s hometown of Derby, and she is now an officer for the West Midlands Police Force.
The BA Magic team read Lisa’s letter and knew they had to reunite the pair so, with Lisa, Debbie and Hayley’s boss, Adam’s help, they planned the surprise of a lifetime.
After weeks of secretive planning, British Airways cabin crew member, Claire Allinson found herself hidden in the wings at a conference Hayley was attending, with a pair of return business class tickets from Sydney to London for Hayley and her mum, Debbie.
Under the ruse of a work request, Adam asked Hayley to remain seated at a table in the large conference room as it was cleared after lunch. As Hayley waited for him to return, a video of Lisa rolled through one of the giant screens telling her to get packed as she and mum, Debbie were flying to London the following day.
After a sleepless night for the pair, they were picked up early and welcomed at Sydney’s Kingsford Smith Airport by the British Airways team, before boarding the aircraft early and being seated with a glass of champagne.
During the 22-hour flight Hayley and Debbie caught up on some much needed sleep on the airline’s fully flat business class beds, watched numerous films and enjoyed the in-flight catering.
Waiting for them at Heathrow was Lisa complete with balloons, flowers and their dog, Hettie, for an emotional reunion.
Hayley said: “I couldn’t believe it and it certainly didn’t sink in until I was back in the UK! It all happened so fast and was like a dream. One day I was at a conference, the next I was in a British Airways business class seat on my way to London to be reunited with my wife!
“Being able to take the trip with Mum was the most special thing and it has meant the world to her. She’d never been on a long-haul flight before and it would have been Dad’s dream to take her on holiday like this. It has awakened so many possibilities within her. This is just the beginning of a new chapter and I know there are many adventures in store for her yet.”
Lisa said: “I got in touch with British Airways more out of hope than expectation. I couldn’t believe it when they said they’d help us. The fact we could surprise Hayley and that Deb could come too, knowing she’d be comfortable and looked after on the flight, made it all the more special.
“Hayley must have wondered what was wrong with me in the run-up to them arriving as I was constantly rushing off our frequent Facetime calls as I was so worried I’d give it away!
“I barely slept a wink the night before they arrived and Hettie and I were at the airport bright and early waiting for the flight. It was so wonderful to see them both appear through arrivals and we had the most amazing time seeing friends and family, visiting Buckingham Palace, walking the gardens of Chatsworth House, touring villages with thatched roofs, savouring proper Cornish pasties and sipping champagne on the London Eye.”
Carolina Martinoli, British Airways’ director of brand and customer experience, said: “As soon as we read Lisa’s email, we wanted to help. They’ve all had an incredibly tough time and it was in our gift to make a big difference.
“It looks like they’ve had an amazing trip to London and we were delighted to hear that it has opened up a world of travel for Debbie again and shortened the distance between Lisa and Hayley seeing each other next. It’s lovely that we’ve been able to help them create some incredible memories and we wish them all the very best for the future.”
British Airways is asking customers who have booked a trip with them to email their stories in, in the hope of making their trip a little bit more magical.
London has the highest number of LGBT+ bars, clubs and venues in the UK. So does it have any lesbian bars and clubs where are they?
London’s LGBT+ scene is the largest in the UK and it does include at least one lesbian venue. The most famous and central is the She Soho in Soho on Old Compton Street (number 23a to be precise). She Soho is mainly focussed at the LBQ women community and says it is the only “women-priority venue” in London, although men are welcome to enter with female guests. The venue has the hottest DJs on the scene, alongside regular drag king cabaret, burlesque and social events.
Probably the most famous bar before She Soho was Candy based in Carlisle Street in Soho, which closed permanently in 2014 due to rent increase demands. It was subject of a 4 part documentary on Channel 5 called Candy Bar Girls. There was also an event called Lounge which also closed despite attempts to bring back the evening in 2014.
Of course, London has many LGBT+ spaces you can find our full listings of LGBT+ and gay-friendly bars and pubs here
This week our medical expert answers a sexual health question on lesbian, bisexual women and people who have vaginas.
Dr Nitin Shori is Medical Director of Pharmacy2U.co.uk, which provides NHS repeat prescription and Online Doctor services, answers,
Dear Doctor,
I’m planning to have sex with someone else who has a vagina (like me) and I want to know more about how to stay safe.
Thank you
M
Dear M
Women can catch sexually transmitted diseases (STIs) through sex or any ‘one-on-one’ contact, such as oral sex or foreplay.
To make oral sex safer, use a dental dam – a small square of very thin plastic or latex, which can be used to cover the genitals or anus. It acts as a barrier and helps to prevent STIs being passed from person to person.
You should avoid receiving oral sex if you are on your period, as menstrual blood can carry HIV or hepatitis. You should also avoid oral sex if your partner has told you they have an STI, if they have a sore throat or if they have any blisters, cuts, rashes, sores or warts around the genitals, anus or mouth, or if they have unhealed piercings in their genitals or mouth.
Some infections can be passed by touching or vulval rubbing. Wash your hands before and after sex, and use latex gloves with plenty of water-based lubricants.
If you are using sex toys, use a condom to cover them. Change the condom for each partner or between penetration of different body openings. Sex toys should also be washed with soap and water between sessions.
If you have had unprotected sex, have any symptoms of STIs or think you may be at risk of catching one, speak to your GP or sexual health clinic. Regular STI tests are a good idea, to ensure you have a healthy sex life.
The advice listed above is not intended to replace or take the place of that of your own doctor, GP or medical professional who knows your full medical history. If in any doubt make an appointment with your doctor as soon as possible.
