THEGAYUK

Tag: Older People

All the latest breaking news on Older people. Browse THEGAYUK’s complete collection of news, articles and commentary on Older people.

  • 10 things you know as a gay guy in your 30s

    Shock horror younglings, gay men in their 30s do exist, I am one of them. And here is my helpful tongue in cheek guide to traversing the minefield of being classed as over the hill by anyone who’s under 25.

    1. It creeps up on you faster than you think.

    http://gph.is/1UkkJdN

    When I was but a wee gay nipper myself back In the early 2000s I never thought 30 would happen. But time marches on, and suddenly I was 30 before I knew it. There’s only 52 Saturday nights to be had in a year, and those goes shockingly quickly. In just a few short years, you too will be a bitter old queen writing articles about how to cope being in your 30s.

    2. Beauty fades, dumb is forever

    http://gph.is/XLjZ6y
    Here’s a tip for you, you aren’t going stay looking the same for the rest of your life, and let’s face it, getting surgery or fillers will make you end up looking like a permanently shocked shop mannequin, or Madonna. So for the love of god, please teach yourself some skills that don’t involve how to get into a pair of skinny jeans.

    3. You WILL lose those luscious locks.

    http://gph.is/29Fls7m

    I still feel a slight pang of jealousy towards the young gays who can have any hairstyle and colour they want, I used to do it myself, but these days I’ve only got 12 hairs, and three of them are my husbands. But there is a high chance that by your 30s you too will either be bald, or balding. So make the most of your hair while you have it, but once you start losing it, shave that stuff off and grow a beard, or invest in some really ridiculous wigs.

    4. You have to become fabulous

    http://gph.is/2jI8mip

    In order to stay relevant on the gay scene, you will have to become hilarious and fabulous. One liners will have to actually be witty, and you need them to distract from your gnarled old face and rapidly vanishing hairline, you will have to become a talking point but luckily, by your 30s you should have met a group of people who put up with your crazy notions of “good music” and who will sit with you and judge everyone else.

    5. Nightclubs will become a chore

    http://gph.is/15CoNhx

    Not only do hangovers last a lot longer, attempting a death drop could result in breaking a hip, and you’ll also find yourself resenting the fact that you can no longer tell when one song ends and another begins. You also don’t want to have to deal with the drama that young gays manage to get themselves into. While in your youth you could cope with the crying friend, the horny friend and the throwing up friend all in one night, once you’re past 30, most of the time your find the expression “oh for f***s sake, what now?” will become a staple of your vocabulary when dealing with the 18 year olds.

    6. It becomes a lot harder to maintain your figure.

    http://gph.is/2d1Xjvo

    That skinny twink body of yours you so love, yep that’ll go the way of your hairline once you get past 25, and it becomes a lot harder to maintain it without taking out a pact with the devil. That whole pizza and cheesy chips you managed to cram down after a night out, will now stay on your hips unless you run a marathon or rig up a home liposuction device using a funnel, a hose and a Dyson.

    7. Hookups in their 40s become a viable option.

    http://gph.is/2ghqsDE

    When you’re 20, the idea of hooking up with a guy in his 40s might seem like a terrible idea unless he’s rich, has a heart condition and you really like loud indoor fireworks. But in your 30s you realise a guy of 40, could only be 5 years older than you and they are the only ones paying you attention on Grindr anymore.

    8 And on the subject of hookups…

    http://gph.is/2lMWs3s

    In one’s youth, you can be ready for a hookup at the snap of a finger and with pretty much anyone. you’d meet a guy in the club, go back to his place and be careful not to wake up his parents. Even an invitation of “can you meet now?” on Grindr is ok, because you know your feet won’t ache if you walk a mile. Past 30, if someone were to ask “meet now?” You’d have to think about whether you can be bothered to travel that far and whether it’s worth having to have another shower for what could potentially be a lacklustre blowjob.

    9. Popularity isn’t everything

    http://gph.is/1SGkont

    The wisdom of old age makes you understand popularity doesn’t mean a goddamn thing if the people who hang around with you wouldn’t piss on you if you were on fire, they’d most likely Snapchat it and try to go viral, so they too can become a vapid attention seeking whore. But fear not young gay, by your 30s the people who have stuck around are the ones who will have your back and most likely be able to provide bail money.

    10. You can still have a f**king good time

    http://gph.is/1uaonYi

    It’s not all doom and gloom, by your 30s you’ll have found yourself, and find the whole idea of the gay scene infinitely amusing and you can appreciate it a lot more. You’ll have met so many different types of people that hardly anything will be a surprise, but you’ll have enough experience not to care. You’ve loved and learned and become a better person for it, so strap on your safety belts, it’s still a hell of a ride.

    https://twitter.com/AndyEG1982

    YOUR SUPPORT MEANS EVERYTHING

    Help us deliver unique, usable and reliable journalism that supports the gay, bisexual and curious community of the United Kingdom. Can you help protect LGBT+ media? Publishers like us have come under severe threat by the likes of Google and Facebook. The problem is that advertisers are choosing to put their money with them, rather than with niche publishers like us. Our goal is to eliminate banner ads altogether on site and we can do that if you could pledge us a tiny amount each month.

    We’re asking our readers to pledge just £1 per month, more if you’re feeling swanky. You can stop payment at any time.

    It’s quick and easy to sign up and you’ll only have to do it once.

    Click to start the journey and support THEGAYUK!

  • INTERVIEW | Ray Houghton

    Meet Ray. He’s nearly 60 and he’s got pure fitness game. In fact’s he’s a celebrity personal trainer and he’s here to show you regardless of your age you can have the body you want.

    It’s clear that you take good care of your body… what motivates you to do this?
    The ageing process motivates me to take good care of my body. I want to do all I can to live a long and active life and to remain independent and fulfilled. Sure, Vanity is a big part too! I will be 60 in November and I look at other people, many half my age, and most are overweight, have joint problems or are stressed. I will do everything I can to remain agile, flexible, strong & healthy and happy. I was born to be different, to stand out in a crowd and to inspire others.

    When did you start? Have you always been a keen gym goer?
    Fitness became a big part of my life from about the age of 12, in the way of home gym equipment. But I started proper gym training from the age of 16. I had joined the Boy’s Junior Army Service and therefore gym training was available and I loved it. I was never an academic at school, I wanted to do physical things instead: Braun not Brains! When I first moved to Spain from Manchester UK, I had a 12-year gap from Body Building and that is the only time you didn’t see me in a Gym. The Gym is my life and I love it.

    What do you say to people who say that the body goes downhill after the age of 35?
    People say that after the age of 35, the body goes down hill… well, yes it does, due to the natural ageing process, our bodies stop producing the Human Growth Hormone (HGH). And eating habits have changed over the years, fast foods instead of natural produce. Alcohol is cheap and has become a normal social activity. Stress is a huge problem and all these things accumulate in aiding us to get old quicker. Weight Training is essential, especially as we age. We must work our bodies to do even the simplest things in life such as climbing stairs, carrying shopping, manoeuvring in & out of the bath…the list goes on. Education in Life Fitness is key and this is one area I feel I am qualified to address. How do celebrities stay looking so young and energetic? Google: Celebrities taking HGH and click on images, you’ll be amazed at who you see!

    You’ve said that quite a few of your admirers are gay guys? How do you feel about this?
    Many of my admirers are indeed gay guys. I really don’t mind at all. In fact, I am flattered! There are not many muscular guys around, especially at my age. ‘Super Hero’ movies are very popular at present… I can be a fantasy in their mind? I respect anyone’s sexual preference.

    Ray Houghton

    Ray Houghton

    Are you in demand for more exposing photoshoots? Would you do any?
    Yes, I get asked for exposing photos and yes, I wish to do another professional photo shoot. I would love to do more photo’s ‘on location’ (outdoor shots) and also using different props to show more of my character and sense of humour. I would like to fill my potential as a ‘Celebrity’ and if it gives pleasure and inspires, then it is all good.

    Tell us something that surprises people when they learn it about you…
    People are surprised to learn that I am indeed aged 59. I have a muscular physique, good skin, a young outlook on life, I like to dress in my own unique style. I am an optimist and very positive. I am a quiet man, somewhat shy at times BUT I can come out with some life stories that surprise people. Also when I say I have a FULL BODY SUIT of Tattoo’s, people are shocked. I have a wealth of body building/fitness knowledge – all simple common sense stuff and people (many of them Personal Trainers) love to learn from me, The Master.

    What are your top workout songs?
    I don’t workout to music (I never use headphones). I only listen to one important thing….MY BODY! I have such a Mind/Body connection, that all background noise (songs), simply disappear. However, there is music playing in my gym, mainly 70’s & 80’s music, which I like. My favourite songs are ‘Kinky Boots’ by Nancy Sinatra, ‘Money Talks (Dirty Cash)’ by Stevie V, ‘Perfect’ by Fairground Attraction, ‘Feeling Good’ by Nina Simone.

    Ray Houghton

    How many days do you work out – and what’s your general routine?
    I workout six days a week. I usually concentrate on training one body part per day: Back, Biceps, Legs, Shoulders, Chest, Triceps. I like to do Body Weight Training: Push Ups, Pull Ups, Tricep Dips etc. I don’t use heavy weights, instead, I concentrate on keeping good form throughout the exercise and higher reps too. I have always been injury free (which is virtually unheard of with most body builders), due to keeping good technique. The only Cardio I do is walking my 3 dogs daily.

     

    All photos (C) Ray Houghton / Used with permission.

  • COMMENT | Does the gay community have an issue with ageism?

    COMMENT | Does the gay community have an issue with ageism?

    We’ll have a gay old timer…

    stevepb / Pixabay

    So here is some background to the idea for these articles… I’m over 50 and no longer feel part of a community like I used to in my 20s or 30s. On the rare occasion, I venture into the Manchester Gay Village or Soho in London, it doesn’t feel right as if I don’t belong anymore as if there’s nothing in those communities for me.

    Next time you’re out and about, take a look around at the bars and clubs on offer, who are they aimed at? Check out their clientele – you have my permission to do that and please, take your time. That cute blonde? Under 30. That red head? Under 40. Where are the LGBTQ people in their 50s or 60s and over?

    Where do we go if you simply want a drink, a dance or a hook-up?  It used to be so easy – find a bar, flirt… job done! After around 40, suddenly, you’re a “daddy” like it or not. There seems to be little else on offer.

    I know, I know, I’m generalising but you get my drift. The majority of venues cater for a younger client group and simply mirror something I’ve been feeling for a while about our inclusive LGBTQ community.

    We’re ageist, like it or not, we are.  I think it could be tracked back to a wider, societal issue.

    We don’t embrace older people and tend to forget that we all age, even the ones who use pig placenta nightly or plump and primp for days. We all age and at some point, we reach that point where we don’t fit into our younger lives, we change but does the community we were once an active part of change with us?  Is it them or us that needs to alter our perceptions and attitudes?

    So, my aim is to write about some of those issues we face as we age, from a gay point of view. Really serious issues like; Can you wear super skinny jeans after 50? Velcro shoes – friend or foe?

    Sorry, couldn’t resist! I mean things like where do you find love after 50?  The complete head f**k of dressing too young and what does age appropriate mean?  The whole thing can be a minefield but we’re here to help or irritate… or both.

    I’ve gotten together a group of t’interweb friends to help by giving the benefit of their advice and experience and who are also willing for me to pester them for straw polls and ideas of what bothers them.

    Watch this space for my first piece, based around finding love after a certain age…

    Opinions expressed in this article may not reflect those of THEGAYUK, its management or editorial teams. If you’d like to comment or write a comment, opinion or blog piece, please click here.

  • 10 Guys Whose Careers Exploded After Turning 40

    Sometimes it can feel like the world’s media is fixated on the achievements of the under 20s. The careers of those who are beyond the age of 25 don’t seem relevant, well we disagree.

    Here’s 10 gay and bisexual men whose careers took off after the age of 40, although some of them were already doing well before that!

    RuPaul

    TV star, Drag Queen and Recording Artist

    Okay so RuPaul was already a star in his twenties, but, during the late 90s and 00s Ru’s career somewhat stalled. However the resurgence of Drag and more importantly, the part that Ru’s show Drag Race has played in giving drag its second wind puts Ru back on top.

    Anderson Cooper

    News Anchor and Reporter

    Although Anderson has always been successful, thanks to his family, it wasn’t until he became the news anchor at CNN in 2003 that his star stock took off and he’s become steadily more and more successful since then. He’s now one of the most recognisable faces of news TV.

    Bianca Del Rio

    Drag Queen

    Bianca Del Rio / Roy Haylock was actually in his late 30s when his appearance and winning of RuPaul’s Drag Race made him a household name. Since turning 40 Roy and Bianca have been travelling the world performing in countless venues – he even has a film coming out…

    Giorgio Armani
    Fashion Designer

    We tread carefully here, as Giorgio hasn’t come out officially as gay or bisexual, but an interview in Vanity Fair in 2000 shed some light on his sexuality, when he said, “I have had women in my life. And sometimes men”. Giorgio’s star was late rising. He showcased his first collected in 1975, when he was 41. Giorgio topped our 2015 Richest list.

    Embed from Getty Images

    Calvin Klein

    Fashion designer

    Fashion DesignerIt wasn’t until the 80s that Calvin Klein clothing and the man himself became the fashion king that it is today, after his company changed the way the world viewed underwear. Although Calvin had success in his formative years, he was well into his 40s when it was arguably his underwear ranges and fragrances that turned his successes around.

    Embed from Getty Images

    Tim Cook (Apple)
    CEO of Apple / Businessman

    Tim Cook became a household name when he took over the top job at Apple and he was into his 50s. He came out as gay in October 2014, becoming one of the most successful out CEOs in history.

    Cyril Nri
    Actor

    Star of Channel 4’s Cucumber in 2015, Cyril, 54, starred in The Bill from 2002 until 2006. His career went astronomical again when he starred in Russell T Davies’ Cucumber making him a household name in the UK. His graphic murder in the showcase became one of the most talked about moments in queer TV history.

    Harvey Milk
    Politician

    Harvey was known as one of life’s drifters, that is until he decided to go into politics in his mid 40s. Although only in the political arena for a few years, before his murder at the age of 48, Harvey’s contribution to the LGBT movement has long been heralded as significant.

    Embed from Getty Images

    Dan Bucatinsky (The Comeback)
    TV Producer and Actor

    In 2005 Dan helped bring The Comeback starring Lisa Kudrow to the world, cementing his position as a go to producer in television. In 2013 he won a Primetime Emmy Award for his involvement in the hit TV drama Scandal.

    Embed from Getty Images

    Nick Denton (Gawker)
    Editor and Media Owner

    Nick Denton, 49, is the founder of Gawker, one of the most powerful blog collectives on earth. In 2007 when he was 40 he entered the Sunday Times Rich List with an estimated worth of £140m.

  • OPINION | The Hairy Grey Gay

    So, here’s the deal…..you’re ageing, bits aren’t working the way they used to and then nature plays the cruellest of jokes on you – you go bald on top only to have hair grow “elsewhere”!

    As your thatch thins, your ears suddenly become playgrounds for what can only be described as industrial strength pubic hair! As if that wasn’t bad enough, you start to notice the odd (very odd) hair on your shoulder, sprouting on your neck well below your beard line, even on your ear lobe! Ok, that last one may be just me but you get the picture. I can’t be the only one with feet like an ageing Hobbit?

    So why is it we grow bald in some places and still grow hair in others? And how much does it affect our confidence as we age – already a dodgy area even if you’re not gay!

    The whole area of us growing hair is a strange subject – we’re born with some, it can change colour as we grow, it appears in places during puberty that we never had it before, it then disappears from some areas as we age and also changes colour again! Talk about keeping us entertained!

    I did a quick straw poll amongst my twitter lovelies and it appears that the majority of us “folic-ally challenged” individuals are FINE with being somewhat thin on top. Luckily fashions change and we are no longer seen as thugs or skinheads if we shave our heads.

    One of my favourite signs in Manchester of recent times offered scalp pigmentation as an option to losing your hair. This reminds me of the old “hair in a can” stuff that used to be available – and maybe still is?

    It sounds like someone comes along with a can of whatever colour your remaining hair is and either sprays your head or slaps some paint on it! It smacks of desperation, but that’s my own opinion, maybe I’d feel differently if I wasn’t happy with the bald look!

    Recent fashions have encouraged beards, moustaches, shaved heads, the most severe partings possible (even shaving them in) so it seems anything goes and for all ages too. No need to feel left out of the fashion loop if you’re 39 and 12 months…..however, maybe ask Santa for one of those lovely nasal hair trimmers – they work wonders and can take care of those tricky little buggers growing in your ears, nose or elsewhere…

     

     

    Opinions expressed in this article may not reflect those of THEGAYUK, its management or editorial teams. If you’d like to comment or write a comment, opinion or blog piece, please click here.

  • COMMENT | I’m Gay, I’m 47, And I’m Still Alive

    So, you’re sitting there, politely minding your own business when BOOM – you’re 47! Now what?

    One minute you’re partying like it’s 1999, then suddenly it’s sometime in the mid-2010s… and you’re worried about heart beats, not beats per minute. Nightclubs don’t hold the same attraction anymore, but Murder She Wrote can hold your attention for hours at a time. Life is less about Girls Aloud and more about The Golden Girls.

    This series of pieces is about growing up and growing old in today’s gay world. How do you plan to grow old? Gracefully or disgracefully? Do you want to be one of those people who gets to a certain age, and stops – holding back time with Botox, face lifts or clothes pegs at the back? Do you still intend to be shopping in Top Man at 70?

    What are your options as you grow older? What lovely surprises are in store for you? At what point do you end up with more hair growing in your ears than on your head?

    I find myself struggling with the ageing issues as I creep slowly towards the grave. In my head I’m no age at all – I can wear what I want, admire hairstyles and think I could carry that off, my music tastes are more Lana Del Ray than Englebert Humperdinck.

    However, I am finding myself more attracted to things I used to associate with my parents. I’ve joined the National Trust and love it. I can’t stand loud music in pubs any longer – I prefer being able to hold a conversation. I find Victor Meldrew to be more a role model than a comic figure – but still not a fashion icon (although I am loving his cardigans!)

    On the health side, I can’t eat and drink what I want anymore – without suffering the consequences. Everything goes straight to my waist and it is now expanding at a rate of knots, less middle aged spread, more late middle aged spread. Gym time has always been a mystery to me but I’ve come to realise that it has its place, just not in my life!I spend time pondering pension provisions, where my nearest Waitrose is and battling constant backache rather than clubbing, staying out all night, and ogling the tottie on display.

    What used to appeal has shifted somewhat – looking at gorgeous young men doesn’t appeal nearly as much as it used to. Being totally honest, I still look, but it feels wrong somehow when you’re old enough to be their dad! At what point do you stop? Regular viewers of my blog will know I haven’t reached that point just yet.

    When I was young, someone my age was considered old, and there seemed to be certain points in life where you, as an individual, aged and moved on. Middle-aged men weren’t fashionable, they wore lots of comfy beige from M&S. After middle age, you slipped slowly into old age and My grandparents dressed and acted like OAP’s were expected to – but today things are different.

    People seem to stay younger longer, not just in their appearance, but in their outlook on life too. People are grandparents in their 40’s these days, having had their children earlier in life – however, time marches on, changes take place and you can slow it down but it still happens.

    My hope is to pop on my specs, fasten my cardi against the chill and take a close look at the issues we face, seriously and humorously!

    If there is anything you’d like to me include or cover, let me know….

    Next time: incontinence, impotence and male pattern baldness – just kidding!

     

    Opinions expressed in this article may not reflect those of THEGAYUK, its management or editorial teams. If you’d like to comment or write a comment, opinion or blog piece, please click here.

  • Stonewall Releases New Guidance For Care For Older Gay People

    New guidance published today by Stonewall gives care and support services practical advice about how to meet the needs of older lesbian, gay and bisexual people.

    (more…)