Tag: Theatre Royal Haymarket

  • THEATRE REVIEW | The Band

    ★☆☆☆☆ | The Band


    The new show The Band is not, as you might think, a musical about Take That – but it damn well should’ve been.

    What we get is a show about four forty-something women who reunite after not having seen other for a long time to see their favourite boy band (now of course no longer a boy band) at a reunion tour concert in Prague. Why Prague you might ask? Because one of the women won a competition to see the band perform there. Why couldn’t one of them have bought tickets to a more local show if they loved the band so much? Well, that would’ve been too easy and would’ve left out one of the major plot points of this show – a broken penis.

    Yes, a broken penis. You see, while the women are in Prague, they get a bit carried away and break the penis off of a priceless statue. Now, if this would happen in real life the women would’ve gotten heavily fined, and perhaps jail time. But when said penis, which is attached to a statue that actually does come to life (before the said penis is broken off), with the penis visible for all the audience to see, it makes for one of the most unintentional laughable moments in the West End. It’s not just laughable – it’s shockable! Who signed off on this scene? And this is just the tip of the iceberg. Take That’s big hit ‘Relight My Fire’ is sung while the characters (while still schoolgirls) are on a bus heading home from a concert, with the carefully hand-picked cast of the boy singers dressed up in bondage gear (with horse helmets). And then all of a sudden out of nowhere one of the girls is killed. Hmmm?

    Another head scratcher is when the song ‘Never Forget’ is sung by the fab five in an airport lounge. There is also a bit of fat shaming in the show (one of the women is obese). Did I mention that the boys can’t really hold a tune and sing in harmony? Or in tune? Not once is the band introduced as characters, meanwhile, they glossfully sing in the background to scenes that have no real connection to the songs.

    This is a jukebox musical that is as empty as a machine with no quarters in it. Sure the songs are great (who doesn’t love a Take That song or two), and one of the women happens to be lesbian, and AJ Bentley has the strongest vocals of all, but what do you expect from a musical show where the singers (boyband) were chosen from a reality television show?

    Whoever signed off on this mess should be really ashamed of themselves. Robbie, Howard, Gary and Mark – you listening?

    The Band plays at the Theatre Royal Haymarket, London. Book tickets now

  • THEATRE REVIEW | Venus In Fur, Theatre Royal Haymarket

    ★★★ | Venus In Fur, Theatre Royal Haymarket

    THEATRE REVIEW | Venus In Fur, Theatre Royal Haymarket

    A playwright/director bemoans the lack of female acting talent after a long day auditioning for the female lead in his new play. In walks Vanda, a ditzy and frenetic actress who’s turned up late but is determined that she’s going to audition for the part whether he wants her to or not.

    David Ives 2010 play is a twisting sexual and gender power play and a play within a play. The piece that Vonda is auditioning for is based around the 1870 novella of almost the same name (add an ‘s’ to the ‘fur’) by Leopold Von Sacher-Masoch. The clue is in the name: masochism was named after Sacher-Masoch and his desire to serve and be punished. The two characters read from the play and the roles they play both in reality and fantasy are in a state of constant flux. Thomas is a man who once stated that working in theatre was a great way to get laid but Vanda is more than prepared to take him on.

    It’s a slight play in some ways and is uneven at times with occasional absurd moments Whilst it has timely themes with the current Weinstein scandal, it’s not exactly searing. That doesn’t really matter here, though. It’s an OK play and is an entertaining 90 minutes but there’s an odd phenomena going on. The actress is far greater than the play. Nathalie Dormer (Margaery Tyrell in Game of Thrones) is totally hypnotising. Her co-star, David Oakes (currently on TV in Victoria), is more than adequate and is also easy on the eye but whatever your persuasion, I suspect you’re eyes will be drawn to every move, intonation and expression from the magnificent Nathalie Dormer. It’s sometimes hard to concentrate on anything but her central performance.

    Ignore the flimsiness of the play, although if S and M is your thing or you’ve ever contemplated this as a pastime then all the better. The main pleasure for most is the chance to watch such a virtuoso performance. Well worth seeing.

    Venue In Fur plays at the Theatre Royal Haymarket until 9th December 2018

  • THEATRE REVIEW | McQueen, Theatre Royal, Haymarket, London

    Crass yob or fashion god? Both, actually. All bile, venom and spunk, Alexander McQueen was a mutant oik messiah, a sartorial serial-killer maniacally slashing mediocrity into mouth-watering magnificence. ★★★★

    But that’s only when his brutally bi-polar, chemsex-twisted muse flew, of course, and new play McQueen – where he’s called Lee, his preferred name throughout – unflinchingly skewers his fatal, full-stop bungee-jump into oblivion.

    If the plot’s simple, the treatment, like McQueen himself, is insolently audacious. It’s the night of McQueen’s suicide, and an anxious Lee – (Stephen Wight) is surprised late at night by impulsive house intruder Dahlia (Carly Bawden).

    Instantly, Dahlia’s nerdy, conflicted, fan-girl worship acts as mental crystal-meth to Lee, and triggers an elegiac night of non-stop revelations. Burst after imagistic burst reveals Lee’s muses, mentors, likings and loathings, collapsing time and space with shockingly raw character expóses.

    That’s where McQueen truly impresses. If his supposedly blunt, scumbag genius was secretly held in contempt by snobs – Givenchy called him ‘le football thug’ – Lee in reality was painfully self-aware and insightful. One scathing scene gorgeously massacres smug faux-sophistication; a vapid reporter’s dissection of a woman is witheringly undone by Lee’s breezily compassionate take.

    So forget strict, dull, lazy biography nailed dead and rotting to the stage. Instead, this is fraught, suicide theatre superbly deployed as a multi-media, psychic minefield. Mime, pumping catwalk themes and video backdrops forensically flesh out Lee’s screaming inner self with an assurance clumsy naturalism would kill for.

    It’s an exact, brilliantly nuanced barometer of a frenzied gay genius’s mind. Time and again, music indelibly stains the action and spotlights Lee’s moods, from Nirvana’s brooding ‘Come As You Are’ to the hallucinatory grandeur of Handel’s Sarabande. And linear logic, throughout, is blatantly sacrificed for wrenchingly exact, emotional precision.

    That’s McQueen’s towering strength, shatteringly used in Lee’s lynchpin exchange with fashionista Isabella Blow, his triple-goddess muse, patron and financial angel.

    As played by Tracy-Ann Oberman, Blow’s a virtuoso study in slinky, fatally insecure hauteur. Both terminally damaged, she and Lee cling like frightened children to each other, as needy, emotionally naked and iconic as Rolling Stone magazine’s cover of John Lennon cradled by Yoko Ono.

    But that beautiful innocence makes only half of a shocking, Who’s Afraid Of Virginia Woolf brutality. It’s as horribly fascinating as watching slow, incremental torture, a frenzied kaleidoscope of pain, grief, betrayal and back-stabbing, as Blow’s callously thrown aside, and Lee’s vicious need to succeed shapes his signature, ‘savage beauty’ ethic.

    Directly sourced from Darwin’s take on nature – ‘red in tooth and claw’ – Lee’s manic, unstable, all-or-nothing creative process was pure Russian Roulette. Onstage, nightmare despair follows each ecstatic peak, awesomely mimicked by surging son et lumiere effects, as Lee, anxious, fragile and broken, exits his unbearable, trampoline existence to Marilyn Manson’s nihilistic, misfit anthem, ‘Beautiful People’.

    Oddly inspirational, a slow-burn triumph of subtle but often savage insight, McQueen deliberately spits on hysterical, West End Wendy fireworks. Instead, it’s far more rewarding; resonant, fully adult theatre worthy of Tony Kushner and Patrick Marber, and more remarkably contemporary than either.

    Until 7 November 2015. Tickets: 020 7930 8800; trh.co.uk

    By Sasha DeSuinn | @msSashaDarling

  • THEATRE REVIEW | Daytona, Theatre Royal Haymarket

    ★★★ | Daytona, Theatre Royal Haymarket

    In a recent interview, Maureen Lipman said that this is ‘unquestionably the best role’ of her career and she’s not wrong. Lipman is jaw-droppingly stunning in the strictly limited season of Daytona at the Theatre Royal Haymarket.

    Daytona is an intimate 3-hander show which tells a story of missed opportunities and what-ifs. Without sharing too much, an Elderly Jewish migrant couple Elli (Maureen Lipman) and Joe (Harry Shearer) are living out their twilight years ballroom dancing and going through the motions of a long and seemingly happy marriage. One evening, whilst Elli is getting last-minute alterations to her dancing dress, Joe’s brother, wild-haired and Hawaii shirt wearing, Billy (Oliver Cotton, who also wrote the play), knocks at the door, after a 30-year estrangement. He tells Joe that he has taken drastic action on a man from their past, he believes was a particularly violent and murderous Nazi during the war, whilst on his holiday, in Daytona.

    His regaling of the story takes up the majority of the first half and is longwinded. The true horror of the back-story fails to register fully – as Billy launches into monologues, so long that they had me looking at my watch. It’s not to say that the emotions weren’t there, but the importance and the investment in the story that an audience needs in the characters and their story are lost with the length of time it takes to get there. It felt as though the audience was lost during the swathes of dialogue.

    It’s not until the second act that the story becomes interesting and Lipman’s competence in ruling the stage is truly felt, reminding us of her abilities as a superb and subtle actor. If only it hadn’t taken so long to get there. There is a captivating monologue where Lipman opens up her character to show an emotionally bereft woman who has only just managed to cope with a life that was forced upon her. A romantic attachment, albeit brief, is quite breathtaking.

    Until 23 August. Box office: 020 7930 8800. Venue details: Theatre Royal Haymarket, London http://www.trh.co.uk