Just goes to show when you think all hope of getting with someone is over, it happens in the strangest of places with people you least expect

Tom (That’s me) got a job working nights in a staff canteen in the next town. Dick and Harry already worked there on the shop floor. I met each of them separately when taking their order for food.

Dick lived with his sister at the outset, though desperate for independence as he wanted somewhere to take by a girl (much the same as any other red-blooded man in his 20s who is straight might). Harry lived alone and although he never said it, mostly because it was so obvious he was a ‘screaming queen’, not a bone in the wrist my dear!

Nights turned into weeks that turned into months. I had established banter with Harry who was totally blind to my undisclosed closeted sexuality and a rapport with Dick much the same as I had with many of the other staff male and female alike.

The living situation of Harry with his sister seemed to hit a crisis point and he, as a stop-gap moved in to live with Dick, who after all had a spare room. It seemed a good fit they had been friends for years and each work nights and sharing the same nocturnal lifestyle.

On a Wednesday night a couple of weeks ago Dick came to me to cancel Harry’s order for chips at break time. It seems Dick had been on Grindr whilst working and had been offered cock, so was declining the vegetarian option in favour of ‘meat’. Don’t know what pic he had on Grindr but I wouldn’t let my dog near him even if I dipped his cock in TCP first. He has the appearance of a walrus who has been shaven whilst sleeping and then immersed in water until after death bloating has occurred.

Dick was completely nonplussed in delivering this message. I queried it with him and asked why he had come to tell me Harry was going off for a sexual encounter? He told me Harry was very open and they had no secrets and he did not think it would shock me.

Around this time Dick was becoming increasingly tactile with me, appearing to take every opportunity to come into the kitchen, to be alone with me. I didn’t see the signs increased levels of touching for prolonged periods desensitising me and getting increasingly close to being intimate. I desperately need to have my Gaydar radar serviced. Then when he brushed up against I suddenly became aware he had something in his pocket the size of an electric screwdriver and it felt like it had been left on the pulse setting.

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Dick, it turns out is ‘straight’ into the nearest man’s bed! Worse in a world of gay men where Harry hadn’t spotted me he had. He’s younger than me single and whilst he is not handsome; sweetheart who am I to complain? I’m so damn ugly I scare children and old ladies in the daylight and set canines a howling.

So Dick likes cock and I like Dick’s dick. It’s all very clandestine as he insists he is straight. We meet in the daytime and I drive him 20 miles back to mine and then back to near to his home. Neither of us are telling Harry who tells me he thinks Dick is seeing some ugly bird as he never brings her back!

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