Ah, the Brits, of the last bastion of drunken, ego driven, campery that hits our small screens every year, oh well that and the Oscars…
Scores of people have won and gone, but it’s the camp moments of this event that keep has tuned in every year. If only to see if Geri Halliwell will be involved. We delved into the annals of Brits history to find its campest moments. The aforementioned Halliwell has three of the campest moments alone. We also have Sharon O, Kylie and Adele’s middle finger…
10. Bjork: I am grateful: grapefruit
Grapefruits are one of the campest fruit we know. Seriously, okay maybe a pineapple is a little gayer, but Grapefruit reminds us of Louie Spence, Bright, zesty but bitter.
9. Geri Halliwell does Jessica rabbit
First on the list of Halliwell’s moments is her Jessica Rabbit moment. Geri knows how to steal the show. Bring back Geri we say.
8. Michael Jackson’s “Christ-like figure”
Never one to be ignored Michael Jackson showed the world what it would look like if he was a god. Too much for Jarvis Cocker who stormed the stage and waggled his bum. Yes, we said Waggled and we own it.
7. Lady Gaga
Pretty much anything Gaga does is high campery.
6. Kylie Mashup
Queen Kylie mashed up her glorious gay hits into one hot homo-song-soup. All rather marvellous. And looking incredible. How does she do it? (Sneaky side eye)
5. Sharon Osbourne
Queen of vamp, you know where you are with Mrs O. Never one to mince her words, she asked Kelly “What have they come as?” about a rather dishevelled looking Artic Monkeys and called Vic Reeves a p*** head bastard.
4. Geri Halliwell Union Jack
Probably one of the most iconic looks of The Brits of all time. A look that would launch a thousand Drag Queens into existence. Let’s face it; Geri is the goddess of Drag. And who knew, that her sister, out of t-towels, made the dress. Dirty dishes.
3. Adele’s Middle Finger
If anyone can flip the bird at millions of viewers at home it’s Adele. Newly crowned as a gay icon, by the listeners of a now defunct Gaydar Radio, Adele couldn’t get two words in edgewise but had time to stick her fingers up…. Oooo errr. We do like a double entendre.
2. Sam Fox & Mick Fleetwood 1989
Everything about Sam and Mick’s hosting was camp, in a tragedy way. We demand, neigh, need this to happen every year. Those awkward silences, those soft mumblings, the knowing looks, it’s like us when we’re on a date when we’ve been Roofied. Don’t worry it’s usually us who packs the Rohypnol.
1. Geri Halliwell, Bag It Up
Geri Halliwell made the world her gyno in 1997 when she sang from the middle of her legs. Usually it’s suggested that you sing from the diaphragm, but no Spicey logic dictates the vay vay is the place.
The editor and chief of THEGAYUK. All in a previous life wrote and produced songs on multi-platinum records.