THEGAYUK

Category: DOING IT

  • Can we use ginger as an insertable during sex?

    This week a reader asks whether he and his partner can use a ginger root as an insertable during sex.

    “Hey guys,

    My partner and I want to be adventurous, and try vegetable insertion, and have been told ginger is particularly good as it gives a burning sensation.”

    Anon

    Dear Anon

    Oh dear god don’t. Have you ever put a ginger directly on to your tongue? It burns. Now multiply that by many times over and that’s what, I imagine, putting a ginger up yer bum will most likely feel like.

    Like chillies, ginger has chemical compounds that cause a burn. In ginger, the chemical is called Gingerol which is very similar to capsaicin – the heat and taste creating chemical in a chilli.

    Now if you’re looking for something that gives off heat that is warming whilst putting something up your ass – then there are loads of lubes that will give you that sensation. For instance, Durex’s Warming lube will effectively warm up your hole, without making it a ring of fire.

    Plus, it’s condom compatible and safe to use internally.

    stux / Pixabay

    If you’re looking for a bobbly insertable, there are many butt plugs or dildos on the market, like these anal beads from Carvaka that will give you interesting and unexpected feelings, down there.

    As with anything that you might think about putting up your bum, a good rule of thumb is, if it burns on the tip of your tongue, it will feel even more intense elsewhere. Remember, the anus is much more difficult to wash out, at speed, than your mouth.

    The advice listed above is not intended to replace or take the place of that of your own doctor, GP or medical professional who knows your full medical history. If in any doubt make an appointment with your doctor as soon as possible.

    To get your sexual health and emotional questions answered click here.

  • SEXUAL HEALTH | Can I use urine to stop the spread of Chlamydia?

    This week a reader asks whether urine can stop an STI infection.

    Dear Team

    I was having a chat with a friend who told me that you could stop an STI like Chlamydia, by using your own urine. He suggested that after having sex, you try to pee but block the end of your penis with your foreskin or just block the hole and it will stop Chlamydia. 

    Is this true?

    Tom, Deeside

    Dear Tom,

    This is not true and please don’t try it. It’s a bit like the myth that says if you pee immediately after sex you’ll not catch or be infected with an STI – such as Chlamydia. It has not been medically proven to work.

    Not only will this not stop an infection, but you could cause real troubles for your penis (and cause irreparable damage) if you block the entrance to the urethra – the tube where the pee comes out of.  Think about what happens to a balloon if you overfill it… now think about the tube in your penis… Yep.

    The only thing that is going to stop the spread of any infection is a good safer sex plan!  As Pam Ann told us, “if it’s not on… it’s not on… Condoms and regular testing at your nearest sexual health clinic. Some clinics offer at home testing kits so make sure you get yourself booked in.

    Have you got a question you’d like to ask our experts?

  • 10 things you can do to make you last longer in bed

    Guys, if you find yourself unable to last long in bed – we’ve got ten tips that might help.

    You’re halfway through your performance with a totally hot guy you just met, when without warning your little Mister calls time. Yes, you’ve spaffed your load without warning. The little swimmers are taking a curtain call as you mutter “I’m so sorry, i.. i…” (I mean, what do you say as he’s riving in agony with man juice in his eye….. ‘It Burrrrrnnnns’)

    Here are our top tips to making sure you last longer in the sack.

    1) Homework.

    The best part of this lesson is that you get to do homework and as much of it as you like. A wank is a key element to why many men prematurely blow their loads. Why? Well if you train yourself to cum quite quickly when you’re alone, the chances are that you will do exactly the same when you’re with a partner. So next time your palm is dating your dick, work your way up to 15 minutes, 20 minutes and for those who have cocks of rock try 30 minutes. Try bringing yourself to the point of no return and then stop before you explode. Giving yourself a moment to relax and start again.

    Give yourself a moment to relax and start again.

    2) Round 2.

    Usually, the second time in a day may take longer to achieve climax. There are two ways. You choke the chicken before you go out for a shag, but if you’re hours in-between meeting your butt buddy, then you can always get down to it twice with the same bloke in one night – a 5-minute breather and climb onboard again! Plus you’ll look like a stud who can go multiple times in an evening. Win win.

    3) Less Stimulation.

    If you’re finding it all too much, just pause for a moment. Find a position where you are less stimulated. Why not call “All Change” and swap positions or roles even. Not only does this give you a moment, but also adds an element of workout to your session.

    It also acts as a communication device! Letting each other know you’re having a great time! The receiver on top will often help with a less stimulating f**k for your penis as he’ll have more control over the thrusts and strokes, allowing you to sit back and enjoy the view.

    NEXT >>

  • ADVICE | I’m going to have sex with someone who has a vagina… like me, how can I stay safe?

    This week our medical expert answers a sexual health question on lesbian, bisexual women and people who have vaginas.

    Dr Nitin Shori is Medical Director of Pharmacy2U.co.uk, which provides NHS repeat prescription and Online Doctor services, answers, 

    Dear Doctor,

    I’m planning to have sex with someone else who has a vagina (like me) and I want to know more about how to stay safe.

    Thank you

    M

    Dear M

    Women can catch sexually transmitted diseases (STIs) through sex or any ‘one-on-one’ contact, such as oral sex or foreplay.

    To make oral sex safer, use a dental dam – a small square of very thin plastic or latex, which can be used to cover the genitals or anus. It acts as a barrier and helps to prevent STIs being passed from person to person.

    You should avoid receiving oral sex if you are on your period, as menstrual blood can carry HIV or hepatitis. You should also avoid oral sex if your partner has told you they have an STI, if they have a sore throat or if they have any blisters, cuts, rashes, sores or warts around the genitals, anus or mouth, or if they have unhealed piercings in their genitals or mouth.

    Some infections can be passed by touching or vulval rubbing. Wash your hands before and after sex, and use latex gloves with plenty of water-based lubricants.

    If you are using sex toys, use a condom to cover them. Change the condom for each partner or between penetration of different body openings. Sex toys should also be washed with soap and water between sessions.

    If you have had unprotected sex, have any symptoms of STIs or think you may be at risk of catching one, speak to your GP or sexual health clinic. Regular STI tests are a good idea, to ensure you have a healthy sex life.

    The advice listed above is not intended to replace or take the place of that of your own doctor, GP or medical professional who knows your full medical history. If in any doubt make an appointment with your doctor as soon as possible.

    YOUR QUESTIONS: HIV | WILLY WONDERS | HOLES | DOING IT | STIs | LUMPS & BUMPS |

    Have you got a question for our medical experts?

  • ADVICE | I have genital herpes and it’s cleared up… Can I have unprotected sex?

    This week Dr Nitin Shori answers a question from a reader who is concerned that they might pass on herpes, even though the outbreak has cleared up.

    I have genital herpes and it's cleared up... Can I have unprotected sex?

    Dear Doctor
    I was diagnosed with genital herpes 1, 6 months ago and have recently started to use Valtrex treatment. Is it possible to have unprotected sex with someone not infected? Or is there still a chance they can contract it even if there are no outbreaks?

    Thank you

     

    Once you have been infected with the herpes simplex virus, it will remain in your body and can lead to occasional outbreaks.

    Unfortunately, it is possible for you to pass the virus that causes genital herpes to a sexual partner at any time – even if you are not experiencing an outbreak and have no symptoms.

    Transmission is even more likely during an outbreak. Condoms are proven to reduce transmission.

    Even if you do not have symptoms, people at risk of passing on herpes should always use an effective barrier method of practising safe sex, such as a condom or dental dam. The same virus causes cold sores and genital herpes and can be passed from one area of the body to the other during oral sex if protection is not used.

    ALSO READ: Ask the doctor…. Did I catch herpes?

    Valtrex helps the body to fight the herpes simplex virus but is not effective in preventing it from being passed from one person to another.

     The symptoms of a genital herpes episode can include small blisters in the anal or genital area, which burst to leave small red sores which can be painful; pain when urinating; stinging, tingling, or itching in the genital area; and a general feeling of malaise, or a flu-like symptom. Prescription treatments are available that shorten the duration and severity of an outbreak.

    Dr Nitin Shori is the Medical Director of the Pharmacy2U Online Doctor service,

     

    The advice listed above is not intended to replace or take the place of that of your own doctor, GP or medical professional who knows your full medical history. If in any doubt make an appointment with your doctor as soon as possible.

    OTHER QUESTIONS: HIV | WILLY WONDERS | HOLES | DOING IT | STIs | LUMPS & BUMPS | BACK TO SEX CLINIC HOME PAGE

  • ADVICE | Can we use a cucumber in the bedroom?

    ADVICE | Can we use a cucumber in the bedroom?

    This week a reader asks whether it’s safe to use certain fruit and veg to spice things up in the bedroom.We ask our writers for their thoughts…

    Can we use a cucumber in the bedroom?

    Dear TGUK

    My boyfriend and I are quite adventurous when it comes to the bedroom and we’re wondering whether we could use fruit and veg and other foods as part of our activities? Is it dangerous to insert things like cucumbers and carrots?

    Paulo,

     

    Dear Paulo,

    Using fruit and veg could be a great way to excite and reignite your sex life. Using soft fleshy, non-acidic fruit such as honeydew melons or watermelons can be an exciting way to get new sensations. Simply put a hole in it and thrusting in and out will provide interesting brand new feelings.

    Alternatively, you can always use other foodstuffs such as chocolate spreads or even Marmite, who recently brought out body paint. To answer your question about carrots and cucumbers, extreme caution must be used when inserting anything into your butt that doesn’t have a handle or give good grip. Many people have ended up in A&E after failing to retrieve a cucumber, banana or carrot lodged in their rectums. A painful experience that can actually lead to death if left untreated. We would urge anyone who has gotten anything stuck up there to seek medical advice immediately, no matter how embarrassed you feel.

    Oh did I say use lots of lube…   

    If you’re looking to insert a food, why not try a lollipop or ice cubes, which will melt.

    It’s best to use implements that are actually designed for insertion, such as dildos and vibrators. Don’t forget if you’re using toys together and share them, to use a fresh condom before using it on your partner, and wash them properly after use. 

    If you are going to insert a carrot, gherkin, cucumber or banana, make sure you’re relaxed. Some of these veg can be much larger than a penis, so using lots of lube and taking your time is a must. Oh did I say use lots of lube…   

    Got a sex health question use the form below to get in touch

  • ADVICE | I’m cumming too quickly what can I do?

    This week a reader asks what he can do to stop ejaculating too quickly. Pharmacy2U’s Clinical Governance Pharmacist Phil Day answers his question.

    I'm cumming too quickly what can I do?

     

    Dear Phil,

    I’ve a bit of an embarrassing question. I cum way too quickly. I’ve been with my boyfriend now for six months and we’ve got a great sex life, in fact it’s a bit too good.  I just can’t last.
     
    Literally I last two minutes tops. We have a fair bit of foreplay and I do get a bit close, but always stop, before I climax – however when it comes to the penetration bit I can’t last at all.
     
    Is there a way I can make myself last longer?

    John, Hull

     

    Dear John,

    This really isn’t anything to be embarrassed about. In fact, one in three men say they have suffered from premature ejaculation at some point.

    Despite what blokes say in the pub, the average length of time from the moment of penetration to orgasm is shorter than you might think. We all need to be a bit more realistic about how long we can keep going.

    One of the key things to understand when finding the fix for you is whether this is a temporary problem or something you have suffered from with other partners as well

    There can be underlying physical problems, as well as mental health issues such as anxiety and stress, that can cause it. Some doctors also reckon there are men who have unusually sensitive penises.

    There are a few things you can try, such as masturbating an hour or two before you think you’re going to have sex.

    Also, try taking deep breaths when you’re on the verge of ejaculating as that briefly shuts down the ejaculatory reflex (an automatic reflex of the body during which ejaculation occurs).

    Use positions where you or your partner can pull out easily and quickly if the act of penetration is too stimulating.

    Many sex therapists recommend adopting a ‘stop-start’ technique entailing taking breaks during sex and thinking about something bland and boring.

    Pharmacies also stock a number of over the counter and prescription-only products that could help you too, including thick condoms and desensitising sprays.

    Medication in the form of tablets is also available to treat premature ejaculation in men who experience this regularly and where it causes distress, and is usually taken one to three hours before having sex. You will need a prescription, which can be obtained from your own doctor or through a private consultation with an online GP.

     

    The advice listed above is not intended to replace or take the place of that of your own doctor, GP or medical professional who knows your full medical history. If in any doubt make an appointment with your doctor as soon as possible.

     

    OTHER QUESTIONS: HIV | WILLY WONDERS | HOLES | DOING IT | STIs | LUMPS & BUMPS | BACK TO SEX CLINIC HOME PAGE

     

    Got a problem you’d like advice on?

  • ADVICE | I Have Piles… Can I Still Have Sex?

    This week a concerned reader asks about haemorrhoids and whether he can still have sex.

    I Have Piles... Can I Still Have Sex?

     

    Dear Jose,

    I have just found that I have piles… Great! The problem is I’m the bottom in our relationship. Is it safe to f**k whilst I’ve got these? If I use creams and they go away, is there a possibility they’ll burst – am I more likely to get an infection – if say we have a three way or go to an orgy?

    J, 40, Somerset.

     

    Dear J

    Anal sex has the potential to inflame pre-existing haemorrhoids (piles), though research shows that it does not cause them in the first place. So long as the piles are not actively bleeding or painful at the time on intercourse then it is probably safe to have sex. If they are bleeding or there is inflammation though this means that the natural protective barrier formed by the skin and mucous membranes is not at its optimum which if exposed to a STI can make transmission more likely.

    I would recommend using Preparation H or Germoloids to help control pain and inflammation and to reduce swelling. During sex it is also important that you use a good water based lubricant, particularly during acts of multiple person or high frequency sexual activity as this will reduce the chance of any inflammation being caused. They are very unlikely to burst during normal sexual activity, even in the case of sex parties, threesomes or orgies. If creams etc. though do not fix the underlying problem and I would recommend as a permanent solution surgical intervention.

    This can now be done almost painlessly by syringing the haemorrhoids and a referral can be obtained by going to see your GP. There are also a number of  private clinics undertaking the therapy which do not require GP referral.

    Jose Perez de la Cruz, BPubHtlth,

    Public Health Practitioner

     

    OTHER QUESTIONS: HIV | WILLY WONDERS | HOLES | DOING IT | STIs | LUMPS & BUMPS | BACK TO SEX CLINIC HOME PAGE

     

    Got a problem you’d like advice on?

  • ADVICE | I Am Thinking About Bottoming For The First Time… How I Can I Be Clean?

    ADVICE | I Am Thinking About Bottoming For The First Time… How I Can I Be Clean?

    This week one reader is concerned about being unclean during sex.

    I Am Thinking About Bottoming For The First Time... How I Can I Be Clean?

    Dear Jose

    I’m thinking about bottoming for the first time and I’m a little worried about being “dirty” down there during sex. I’ve heard about certain things you can do to make sure you’re clean and that there’s no sh*t when you’re having sex?
    Is there anything I can do that’s safe?

    Thank you for your advice

    Tom, 25 Huddersfield

    Dear Tom,
    Hi there it depends what you mean by dirty. Obviously proper preparation prior to undertaking sexual activity such as anal sex reduces the chances of embarrassing things occurring such as “sh*t dick”.

    This can be accomplished by proper douche technique or commercially available enemas.

    From a sexual health point of view, any sexual act is broadly safe so long as you or your partners do not have any STIs, id you do have any underlying STIs then get them treated.

    The best way to protect against these is to use condoms and to get regularly tested for STIs, at least every 3 months, this testing is available free at NHS sexual health clinics and some Terrence Higgins Trust offices. I would also recommend using condoms with a good water-based lubricant, again these are available free form Terrence Higgins Trust.

    Advice by: Jose Perez de la Cruz, BPubHtlth,
    Public Health Practitioner

    BACK TO SEX HEALTH CLINIC

  • ADVICE | Can We Use Fruit And Veg In Bed?

    ADVICE | Can We Use Fruit And Veg In Bed?

    My boyfriend and I are quite adventurous when it comes to the bedroom and we’re wondering whether we could use fruit and veg and other foods as part of our activities? Is it dangerous to insert things like cucumbers and carrots?

    Using fruit and veg could be a great way to excite and reignite your sex life. Using soft fleshy, non-acidic fruit such as honeydew melons or watermelons can be an exciting way to get new sensations. Simply put a hole in it and thrusting in and out will provide interesting brand new feelings.

    Alternatively you can always use other foodstuffs such as chocolate spreads or even Marmite, who recently brought out body paint. To answer your question about carrots and cucumbers, extreme caution must be used when inserting anything into your butt that doesn’t have a handle or give good grip.

    Many people have ended up in A&E after failing to retrieve a cucumber, banana or carrot lodged in their rectums. A painful experience that can actually lead to death if left untreated. We would urge anyone who has gotten anything stuck up there to seek medical advice immediately, no matter how embarrassed you feel.

    Oh did I say use lots of lube…

    If you’re looking to insert a food, why not try a lollipop or ice cubes, which will melt.

    It’s best to use implements that are actually designed for insertion, such as dildos and vibrators. Don’t forget if you’re using toys together and share them, to use a fresh condom before using it on your partner, and wash them properly after use.

    If you are going to insert a carrot, gherkin, cucumber or banana, make sure you’re relaxed. Some of these veg can be much larger than a penis, so using lots of lube and taking your time is a must. Oh did I say use lots of lube…

  • ADVICE | How To Last Longer In Bed

    ADVICE | How To Last Longer In Bed

    It’s happened to the best of us. At the worst of times.

    You’re halfway through your performance with a totally hot guy you just met, when without warning your little Mister calls time. Yes, you’ve spaffed your load without warning. The little swimmers are taking a curtain call as you mutter “I’m so sorry, i.. i…” (I mean, what do you say as he’s riving in agony with man juice in his eye….. ‘It Burrrrrnnnns’)

    Here are our top tips to making sure you last longer in the sack.

    1) Homework

    The best part of this lesson is that you get to do homework and as much of it as you like. A wank is a key element to why many men prematurely blow their loads. Why? Well if you train yourself to cum quite quickly when you’re alone, the chances are that you will do exactly the same when you’re with a partner. So next time your palm is dating your dick, work your way up to 15 minutes, 20 minutes and for those who have cocks of rock try 30 minutes.

    How to last longer in bed?
    (C) BIGSTOCK

    Try bringing yourself to the point of no return and stopping. Giving yourself a moment to relax and start again.

    NEXT >>> (go for a second round)

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