THEGAYUK

Tag: Gender

All the latest breaking news on gender. Browse The THEGAYUK’s complete collection of features and commentary on gender and the LGBT+ community.

  • This person just posted a powerful poem about how periods aren’t just for women

    Cass Clemmer just posted an incredibly powerful poem about periods.

    Trans advocate Cass Clemmer took to Instagram to post about how periods aren’t just for women and described theirs* as “traumatic”. Cass used the poem to describe periods that their impact on life.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BWdC16fDCRp/?taken-by=cassclemmer

    Read the full poem here:

     

    Y’all know I’m trans and queer,
    And what that means for me all around,
    Is something that’s neither there nor here,
    It’s a happy, scary middle ground.
    So when I talk gender inclusion,
    And I wrote these rhymes to help you see,
    I’m not tryna bring up something shallow,
    Periods are honestly pretty traumatic for me.
    See my life is very clearly marked,
    Like a red border cut up a nation,
    A time before and a time beyond,
    The mark of my first menstruation.
    So let me take you back,
    To the details that I can still recall,
    Of the day I gained my first period,
    And the day that I lost it all.
    I was 15 and still happy,
    Running around, all chest bared and buck,
    Climbing trees, digging holes,
    And no one gave a single fck.
    I mean I think my ma was worried,
    So I went and grew out my locks,
    A sign I was normal, still a girl,
    A painted neon sign for my gender box.
    So, the day I got my period,
    My god, a day so proud,
    This little andro f    cked up kid,
    Had been bestowed the straight, cis shroud.
    The relief got all meshed up in my pain,
    In that moment, I sat down and cried,
    Just thanking god I was normal,
    While mourning the freedom that had died.
    Everyone told me my hips would grow,
    I looked at them and couldn’t stop crying,
    “What’s wrong with you? You’ll be a woman!”
    They kept celebrating a child dying.

    See my body had betrayed me,
    That red dot, the wax seal,
    On a contract left there broken,
    A gender identity that wasn’t real.
    Most people deal with blood and tissue,
    And yet my body forces me to surrender,
    Cause every time I get my cycle,
    Is another day I shed my gender.
    My boobs betray me first,
    I feel them stretching out my binder,
    I send up questions, “am I cursed?”
    And wish to god that she was kinder.
    The five days it flows,
    I try to breathe, I dissociate,
    While my body rips outs parts of me,
    Leaving nothing but a shell of hate.
    The blood drips from an open wound,
    Of a war waging deep inside my corpse,
    The battle between mind and body,
    Immovable object; unstoppable force.

     

    *Cass Clemmer’s preferred pronouns are they/theirs/them or just Cass

  • London’s transport system is going gender neutral

    Hearing “Ladies and Gentlemen” on London’s Underground is set to become a thing of the past as Transport for London looks to lose gendered announcements.

    London's transport system is going gender neutral

    It appears that Transport for London (TfL) is to stop using the term “ladies and gentlemen” to replace with a simple “everyone” on its public announcements. Campaigners have stressed that the gendered term belongs in the past.

    Employees have been told to stop using the term in announcements to passengers and instead use a more inclusive “everyone”.

    The change is happening after campaigners appealed to Sadiq Khan, London’s Mayor, to update the policy on announcements.

    Mark Evers, TfL’s boss of customer strategy, said the corporation wanted,

    “everyone to feel welcome on our transport network”.

    “We have reviewed the language that we use in announcements and elsewhere and will make sure that it is fully inclusive, reflecting the great diversity of London.”

    Stonewall, the LGBT charity backed the changes saying,

    “Language is extremely important to the lesbian, gay, bi and trans community, and the way we use it can help ensure all people feel included.

    “We welcome gender neutral announcements to be rolled out across TfL, as it will ensure that everyone – no matter who they identify as – feels accounted for.”

    Speaking at the Mayor’s Question Time last month, Sadiq explained,

    “Transport for London serves a vibrant, diverse and multicultural city, and provision of an inclusive transport service is at the heart of TfL’s purpose,” he said.

    “I am aware however, that some customers may not relate to or feel comfortable with the way that certain station announcements are made.

    “I am keen that TfL addresses these concerns by speaking in a more neutral way when referring to gender.”

     

  • A non-binary parent has won the right to have “U” written on their baby’s birth certificate

    The child of a non-binary parent has been issued with a health card with their sex classified as “U” in a landmark decision.

    A non-binary parent has won the right to have "U" written on their baby's birth certificate

    Kori Doty, who identifies as a non-binary transgender person, is the parent of an eight-month-old baby and has successfully won the right to have the child’s birth certificate marked with “U” where the sex marker is registered. It is believed that the”U” marker is the first of its kind.

    The child’s name is Searyl and was born eight months ago in Canada.

    Doty is now using the “they, their and them” pronouns and said that they would recognise the child “as a baby” rather than a boy or a girl.

    Speaking to CBC, Doty said,

    “I’m raising Searyl in in such a way that until they have the sense of self and command of vocabulary to tell me who they are, I’m recognising them as a baby and trying to give them all the love and support to be the most whole person that they can be outside of the restrictions that come with the boy box and the girl box”.

    Speaking to Global News, the family’s lawyer, barbara findlay, who chooses to spell her name without capital letters, said,

    “The assignment of sex in this culture is done when a medical person lifts up the legs and looks at the baby’s genitals. But we know that the baby’s own gender identity will not develop for some years until after they’re born.”

     

     

  • ADVICE | I’m going to have sex with someone who has a vagina… like me, how can I stay safe?

    This week our medical expert answers a sexual health question on lesbian, bisexual women and people who have vaginas.

    Dr Nitin Shori is Medical Director of Pharmacy2U.co.uk, which provides NHS repeat prescription and Online Doctor services, answers, 

    Dear Doctor,

    I’m planning to have sex with someone else who has a vagina (like me) and I want to know more about how to stay safe.

    Thank you

    M

    Dear M

    Women can catch sexually transmitted diseases (STIs) through sex or any ‘one-on-one’ contact, such as oral sex or foreplay.

    To make oral sex safer, use a dental dam – a small square of very thin plastic or latex, which can be used to cover the genitals or anus. It acts as a barrier and helps to prevent STIs being passed from person to person.

    You should avoid receiving oral sex if you are on your period, as menstrual blood can carry HIV or hepatitis. You should also avoid oral sex if your partner has told you they have an STI, if they have a sore throat or if they have any blisters, cuts, rashes, sores or warts around the genitals, anus or mouth, or if they have unhealed piercings in their genitals or mouth.

    Some infections can be passed by touching or vulval rubbing. Wash your hands before and after sex, and use latex gloves with plenty of water-based lubricants.

    If you are using sex toys, use a condom to cover them. Change the condom for each partner or between penetration of different body openings. Sex toys should also be washed with soap and water between sessions.

    If you have had unprotected sex, have any symptoms of STIs or think you may be at risk of catching one, speak to your GP or sexual health clinic. Regular STI tests are a good idea, to ensure you have a healthy sex life.

    The advice listed above is not intended to replace or take the place of that of your own doctor, GP or medical professional who knows your full medical history. If in any doubt make an appointment with your doctor as soon as possible.

    YOUR QUESTIONS: HIV | WILLY WONDERS | HOLES | DOING IT | STIs | LUMPS & BUMPS |

    Have you got a question for our medical experts?

  • Piers Morgan condemns LGBT charity Stonewall as bigoted and “Piers-phobic”

    Piers has hit back at the UK’s largest LGBT charity, Stonewall after a spokesperson condemned his interview of a non-binary couple as “deeply damaging and offensive”.

    non-binary couple interview with Piers Morgan

    This morning, Piers interviewed non-binary couple Fox and Owl, who were using the opportunity to explain gender identities to Piers Morgan on ITV’s Good Morning Britain. However, the interview was slammed by many watching the programme for Piers’ approach to the subject.

    Stonewall was asked to comment on the interview.

    Speaking to PinkNews a spokesperson for Stonewall, said that Mr Morgan was ““deeply damaging and offensive”.

    The charity added,

    “No-one has the right to deny another person’s gender identity, and to mock them for trying to live an authentic life is a form of bullying and completely unacceptable.”

    It didn’t take long for Mr Morgan to take a swipe at the charity. He criticised Stonewall, calling them bigoted and “Piers-phobic” after they accused him of bullying on screen.

    During the show, after both Fox and Owl explained their identity and how they define themselves, Piers had a problem with understanding and asked,

    “I’m happy to be persuaded if it makes logical sense – but if you can identify as anything, where does it end?

    “Is anything fine? Can I be an elephant? Can I now go to London Zoo and demand to be put in the elephant enclosure?”

    The interview then turned to the subject of non-binary prisons and where, if Fox or Owl were to break the law, they should be incarcerated. Owl told Piers that a women’s prison would be preferable to the men’s. Piers responded that gender was fine “if it’s convenient”.

    Commenting on the online discussion surrounding the appearance of Fox and Owl on ITV, Stonewall CEO Ruth Hunt tweeted,

    https://twitter.com/ruth_hunt/status/864755896831938561

     

  • Twitter users are not happy with Piers Morgan after Non Binary interview

    Piers Morgan attracts the ire of Twitter users after a combative interview with a non-binary couple.

    Pier Morgan is being criticised for the way he handled an interview with a couple who identify as non-binary. The couple, Fox and Owl were being interviewed on Good Morning Britain on ITV. You may remember Fox from Channel 4’s My Transsexual Summer.

    “Fox and Owl” has been trending in the UK after a segment called “The Gender Debate” saw host Piers Morgan ask if he could identify as an elephant and London Zoo.

    The interview was dubbed “inanely cruel”, disrespectful and “ill-formed”

    During the show, after both Fox and Owl explained their identity and how they define themselves, Piers had a problem with understanding and asked,

    “I’m happy to be persuaded if it makes logical sense – but if you can identify as anything, where does it end?

    “Is anything fine? Can I be an elephant? Can I now go to London Zoo and demand to be put in the elephant enclosure?”

    The interview then turned to the subject of non-binary prisons and where, if Fox or Owl were to break the law, they should be incarcerated. Owl told Piers that a women’s prison would be preferable to the men’s. Piers responded that gender was fine “if it’s convenient”.

    Owl also pointed out the discussion surrounding non-binary individuals wasn’t about erasing gender.

    Owl said,

    “It’s not about erasing gender, nobody is saying people can’t be men and women – we’re also saying people can be non-binary”.

     

     

     

     

     

  • This theatre has the best all-gender toilet sign

    Sometimes you just gotta love a company’s sensibility.

    The management at this theatre in New Zealand doesn’t care what gender you identify as, or it seems, even if you identify as human – just as long as you wash your hands.

    The sign was the idea of the theatre director Sarah Anderson. Speaking to the Otago Daily Times the theatre manager said,

    “We like people to be relaxed and that’s the point of having the sign,

    “It takes any anxiety away for people who might feel pressured into going into toilets specified for one gender, or another, when they don’t necessarily relate to that gender.

    “The sign was installed to help people ‘to feel more comfortable and safe”.

    Quite right.

  • DILEMMA | My co-workers aren’t respecting my identity, they keep misgendering me

    DILEMMA | My co-workers aren’t respecting my identity, they keep misgendering me

    A reader is finding that their co-workers are misgendering them. The only problem is the reader hasn’t yet spoken up about it yet.

    (C) RAWPIXEL.COM / BIGSTOCK

    I’m really upset. I’m finding it difficult to face work at the moment. My co-workers keep misgendering me and it’s really upping my anxiety. I would prefer people to refer to me as they, them or their. The only problem is I haven’t found the courage to tell them that’s what I want. I don’t think they’d understand if I tried to explain it. I really can’t face going to work anymore because of it.

    Jay, Coventry

    Dear Jay,

    It’s understandable that you’re upset about your co-workers misgendering you, and of course, that is bound to cause anxiety levels to rise. On the other hand, unless your co-workers are told that you wish to be referred to as they, them or their, they’re not going to know that they are misgendering or upsetting you. Have you spoken to your manager at work?

    If your manager is aware of the situation and how you are feeling, they may be able to explain to your colleagues on your behalf that you wish to be referred to as they, them or their. Your manager may also be able to assist you with explaining it to your colleagues yourself if you felt strong enough to do that with support. Either way, try speaking to your manager, or even a trusted colleague, to see what help is available.

    A good manager will support you. If you feel unable to speak to anyone at your work, I’d advise contacting your local LGBT+ organisation, if there is one in your area, and finding out what support they’re able to offer. It’s important that you do not continue to suffer in silence if it’s having such a detrimental impact on you.

    Have you got a question for our experts? Use the form below to get in touch.

  • There’s been a 47% rise in calls from LGBT kids to Childine

    National Children’s counselling helpline, Childline is receiving around 21 calls a day from children concerned about coming out, acceptance and gender dysphoria and being transgender.

    • Children’s charity says it’s received a 47 per cent soar in calls from children worried about LGBT matters.

    • In 2015-16 the charity carried out 7729 counselling sessions with children.

    • Fear of stigmatisation still a real concern for children between the age of 12 and 15.

    Children’s charity NSPCC which runs the national helpline, Childline, has revealed that calls to their counselling service have risen by nearly 50 per cent from children who have concerns about coming out, acceptance, gender dysphoria and being transgender. The charity’s CEO Peter Wanless said, that children as young as 12 fear stigmatisation and anti-LGBT bullying which could leave to serious mental health issues.

    He called upon adults such as parents, teachers or relations to encourage young people to “speak out” and to make them feel confident in speaking openly about sexuality or gender identity.

    He said,

    “Talking about sexuality and gender identity can be daunting for anyone, but especially for children and young people who are still trying to find their place in the world. Fear of being stigmatized or subjected to bullying can force many to bottle up their thoughts and feelings which can leave them feeling isolated, and can trigger serious mental health issues.

    “It is vital children and young people feel confident and supported to speak openly about sexuality or gender identity without fear of negative reactions and abuse. Adults, be it a parent, relation, teacher or friend,  have a key part to play by helping them  navigate these difficult and confusing issues, encouraging them to speak out, if not to them, then to peers or Childline.”

    12-15-year-olds were most likely to contact Childline online or over the phone to talk about issues including coming out, self-acceptance and gender dysphoria and transgenderism. In a quarter of counselling sessions about sexuality and gender identity issues, the young person told Childline they had not previously confided in anyone else, many told us they found it difficult to talk openly with peers and family members.

    ALSO READ: The best anti-bullying websites

     

    Homophobic bullying was mentioned in almost 450 counselling sessions and can stop young people from speaking out about sexuality or gender identity. In almost a quarter (24%) of counselling sessions about sexuality or gender identity, young people said they suffered from depression, low self-esteem, self-harm or suicidal thoughts.

    Dame Esther Rantzen, President of Childline said,

    “I have met young people who were desperately unhappy because they couldn’t talk to anyone about issues regarding their sexuality and I am so pleased that they do feel able to talk to Childline and reveal their feelings without being judged or stigmatised. It is not helpful that children use the term ‘gay’ as a common term of playground abuse.

    “Furthermore, for years the adult world has created a taboo around these issues which effectively imprisoned young people and in some cases has even led to depression and suicide. Childline is calling upon the adult world to listen sensitively and support young people and protect them from this profound unhappiness and loneliness.”

    Any child or young person who wants to talk about sexuality or gender issues can call Childline on 0800 1111 or visit www.childline.org.uk

     

     

     

  • A study finds that Male/Female WC signage could be replaced by room descriptions

    A study finds that Male/Female WC signage could be replaced by room descriptions

    A research team were granted £50,000 to study whether terms to describe public toilets were accessible. They’ve released their findings.

    A research team from Sheffield Hallam University were awarded nearly £50,000 in June last year, from the Arts and Humanities Research Council to research the way public toilets are designed, “in an effort to assess if they are fit for purpose for the UK’s diverse 21st Century society.”

    The paper , which was published last month, points out that school toilets are one of the first places where children learn that “disabled and queer bodies are out of place”.

    The research is now complete and they managed to find some interesting ways of ensuring that people don’t feel left out or marginalised when using public facilities. The 7000-word report outlines how some respondents thought that changing the male/female icon with a description of the room’s content could be more helpful.

    Education and Disability Studies researcher Dr Jenny Slater wrote,

    ” A suggestion from participants was to write on the toilet door the contents of the toilet cubicle, e.g. toilets with urinals, toilets without urinals, larger toilet with grab bars.

    “Participants thought it was important for others to not judge people’s choice of toilet, but to allow people to use whichever space was accessible for them (‘accessible’ being used in the broadest sense of the word).

    “This would mean critically considering the signage on toilet doors in order to understand how toilets do not just illustrate categorisation by gender, disability (and historically, race), but also actively produce such categories.”

  • Oxford University students are being instructed to use “Ze” instead of “he” or “she”

    Students at one of the world’s most prestigious universities have been handed a leaflet explaining why they should start to use the pronoun “ze” instead of gender-specific pronouns such as “he” or “she”.

    The leaflet, which has been distributed by the student union is a campaign they hope will prevent discrimination and offence caused by the incorrect use of pronouns for students at the University. It is hoped that the rules will be used in lectures and in general use around campus.

    The Sunday Times reported that students already face disciplinary action if they purposefully misgender a person. According to its behaviour code, “repeated use of the wrong pronoun to define a transgender person is an offence”. Language that “may amount to harassment” or “deliberately using the wrong name or pronoun in relation to a transgender person, or persistently referring to their gender identity history” could land the perpetrator in trouble.

    Cambridge University is apparently moving to use the gender neutral pronouns. Its student’s welfare officer, Sophie Buck,  said,

    “Events start with a speaker introducing themselves using a gender neutral pronoun. It’s part of a drive to make the union intersectional.”

    However, it the use of introducing gender pronouns or asking people to reveal what pronouns they wish to use, has been criticised by some as a means of forcing someone to use gender pronouns before they are ready to come out or reveal their gender identity before they are comfortable to do so.