Author: Jake Hook

  • EARPHONE REVIEW | Jam Ultra

    EARBUD REVIEW | Jam Wireless Audio Ultra

    Introduction

    If you’re not a fan of the headphone, then earbuds are the only other option – and what with Apple doing away with the standard audio jack, wired head and earphones could be a thing of the past. Wireless earbuds are a marvel – no tangled wires, no choking yourself when getting up from your desk when you’re still attached to your computer. There’s a lot of freedom. But there are problems too. Earbuds don’t always stay in the ear, you have to remember to charge them and then there’s the worst bit – pairing them. Jam have sorted two of these issues out perfectly with their Ultra earbuds – the pairing issue – not so much.

    Build And Quality

    Out of the box and charged in their own little charging dock, the Jam Ultras are incredibly easy to use. The individual earbuds have built-in batteries and as you lift them out of the dock they pair with each other – pairing them to your device, be it, phone or desktop isn’t too much of a sweat either. Most of the time.

    Speaking of sweat they are resistant to it, which is fantastic if you should use them whilst out jogging or in the bath. They are dark in colour and once fitted into the ear are almost unnoticeable. None of the ridiculous white stork thing that’s going on with Apple’s own earbuds.

    They last for three hours on one charge – but with their own charging dock, which can charge them up to 10 times, these buds can last for 30 hours. Rather brilliantly because there’s a USB port you can also charge your phone while you’re at it.

    They have a simple look to them, dark and with a slight material texture to them. Once they’re in, the noise blocking from the external world is brilliant. If you’re looking for noise cancelling headphones these, although not actually “noise cancelling”, are a great find.

    Now here’s the problem – I found that these were impossible to use for TV or for watching any kind of streaming. They can’t keep up with your device and the lipsync is terrible.

    They also, rather annoyingly have a habit of desynchronising with each other – meaning that one ear suddenly goes dead and then comes back after a moment. Considering the wireless feature is probably why you’d buy these earphones, it’s utterly infuriating.

    Controlling the earbuds is a simple process. There’s a pause button, which doubles up as the pairing and off button. You can’t change the volume or skip to the next tune on these.

    You can use them to answer calls and speak wirelessly.

    The JAM ULTRA’s come with their own charging dock.

    Sound

    The fact that these earphones do a great job of filtering out external sounds, means audio feels very present – and up close. The bass response is good for the tiny speakers – but perhaps the top end feels a little dead, which gives an overall mid to bottom sound palette.

    Verdict

    If you’re looking for sub-£100 wireless earphones that come with their own docking station – which are easy to set up then these are a good fit. If you’re looking to watch TV with your earbuds then these aren’t for you.

     

    LOVE

    Good bass response for little speakers

    Nicely packaged

    Charging Dock

    LOATHES

    Desynchronising earphones

    Shortish battery life

    You can buy them from Amazon.com

  • HEADPHONE REVIEW | Noise Cancelling Lindy NC60

    HEADPHONE REVIEW | Noise Cancelling Lindy NC60

    Introduction

    Noise cancelling headphones have become increasingly popular in recent years, as we look to envelop ourselves in our own world, cutting out the distraction of the world around us. It’s especially beneficial in open plan offices, packed tubes, homes near busy roads and well, maybe even a snoring partner. The only problem is that they tend to be very pricey, especially if you’re looking for solid construction and successful noise cancellation. The Lindy NC60’s tackle this on all three fronts – they are sub – £60.00, they look robust and they promise to cancel 85% of noise.

    Build And Quality

    Out of the box, the Lindy 60s are incredibly easy to use. Simply insert the batteries supplied, plug in the jack into your device, turn on the ‘ANC’ (active noise cancelling) function and away you go. There’s no pairing to do as they aren’t Bluetooth.

    They feel solid and have a rubberized texture to the cup and that signature red inner. The padding is thick and comfortable and should fit over the average ear and provide a good basic level of sound isolation, even before you turn on the ‘ANC’. They are padded with leather, not great if you’re a vegan or someone who doesn’t like animal products in everyday objects. In past experience, although not of these headphones, leather headphone pads can begin to degrade after a couple of years of use, especially if they get wet – from sweat or indeed using them in the bath and having wet hair.

    The cup has a couple of simple controls. A volume fader and the on switch for the noise cancellation, which as a blue LED to show whether it’s on or not.  On the other ear a standard wired headphone jack output – which attaches to your device.

    The bridge between the two ear cups is well padded and fits nicely on top of the head. The squeeze between the two cups is good and doesn’t feel uncomfortable.

    The noise cancellation feature is powered by two AAA batteries which are supplied, but not rechargeable, which is a huge let down for these headphones.

    The product also comes with a neat hard-body travel case and a couple of adapters.

    Sound

    When the ‘ANC’ is turned off the sound is plain and dull, feeling distant and to be frank muffled, however, once the noise cancellation feature is turned on, the sound comes alive. It’s certainly a lot more present as the background sounds are also filtered out. The headphone gives a good performance, that rivals much more expensive sets. In fact, once you’ve experienced Noise Cancelling headphones, it will be hard to go back to any other type of headphone.

    Is the noise cancelling affective on these headphones? Well, as they say, you get what you pay for. It’s not as deadening as other headphones we’ve tested, some offer different levels of cancellation, these just take out the lower end frequencies, which can mean you get bleed through of higher end noises.

    Verdict

    A good entry-level to noise cancellation that won’t break the bank.

     

    LOVE

    Price  – Sub £60 for Noise Cancellation is great

    Good bass response and bright sound

    Nicely packaged

    LOATHES

    Leather padding

    Batteries not rechargeable

    You can buy them from Lindy.co.uk or Amazon.com

    Tech Spec

    • Over-ear design with breathable protein leather ear pads
    • ANC reduces external low frequency noise by up to 85%
    • 40mm high output drivers with neodymium magnets
    • Impedance: 32Ω passive mode / 100Ω ANC mode
    • Sensitivity (1mW@1kHz ±3dB): Passive 93dB ANC 103dB
    • Nominal THD: Passive <0.1%@ 1kHz / ANC <0.5% @ 1kHz
    • Frequency response: 20Hz – 20kHz
    • Battery Life:
    • ANC mode only (no audio playback): 130 Hours
    • ANC mode with playback at 50% volume: 72 Hours
    • Adjustable volume
    • Powered by two AAA batteries
    • 3.5mm Stereo Jack Socket for detachable 3.5mm cable
    • Dimensions: 196 x 160 x 45mm
    • Weight: 203g (including 2 x AAA battery)
  • 10 Halloween costumes for totally lazy gay guys

    So, you know, Halloween is coming up… Here are 10 costumes that are totally easy to pull off, with just a little gay sensibility.

    Patrick Bateman

    via GIPHY

    Remember him from American Psycho – well, the film does have a totally homoerotic subtext and a lot of talk has been utter on whether actually, Patrick is gay or bisexual.

    All you need is:

    1. A smart suit, if you have a £3000 one with power even better
    2. A power tie, which must be red and you must have matching braces
    3. An 80’s mobile phone
    4. A rain mac, which must be see through
    5. An axe – brand new, with shiny, shiny head

    James Dean

    Much was made, in the years after his death of his sexuality. His early death meant that Dean would become a legend. This is a really simple look to pull off.

    All you need is:

    1. White T-shirt
    2. Classic cut jeans
    3. Boots
    4. All-American Harrington jacket

     

    Jesse Walsh

    Nightmare On Elm Street 2 was loaded with homoerotic undertones… why not relive the early 80s with a Jessie costume. Make sure you spend most of the evening shouting something about Freddy being inside of you…

    All you need is:

    1. Yellow patterned shirt
    2. Vintage cut blue jeans
    3. Baseball cap
    4. Golden glasses
    5. A radio blasting out 80’s hits

     

    Ariana Grande

    GUYSWITHIPHONES

    Some consider her a gay icon and her recent look of bunny ears is a totally hot look for guys.

    All you need is:

    1. Bunny ears and black face mask
    2. Washboard stomach
    3. White stiletto shoes
    4. Tall stool to balance on

     

    An Instagram Shot

    Getting the perfect selfie is a nightmare…

    All you need:

    Supersize cardboard cut out of an Instagram screen – you can actually buy them on Amazon.

     

    Cornfed Cowboy

    We’re not sure this is particularly scary, but this guy is mighty hot, so we’ve included!

    A post shared by Preston Brock (@prestonbrok) on

    All you need is:

    1. Ranch hat
    2. Plaid shirt, with arms cut off
    3. Short shorts – preferably denim
    4. Biceps so big they block the sun

     

    The Bottom…

    “I’m a bottom, duh.” #top #halloweencostume #halloween #gay #gayhalloween

    A post shared by Joe (@lilwhorechata) on

    Fancy being a Halloween bottom?

    All you need is:

    1. Well, to be honest, you could wear anything, but make sure you ass looks perky… and if anyone asks always say “I’m a bottom, duh.”

     

    A Carebear

    If you’re a kid from the 80s or 90s then you’ll know there was no gayer cartoon than the Carebears. Now you can be GayBear…

    All you need is:

    1. Basically not much, just decide which kind of Carebear you wish to be and draw your logo on your belly – on top of a white background.
    2. Bear ears
    3. Bear nose
    4. Shout Carebear Stare often and in people’s faces

     

    Gay soldier

    gay soldier boy #halloween see my story for the full body outfit!

    A post shared by Doug Armstrong (@dougarmstrong) on


    This is really really simple to achieve.

    All you need is:

    1. Face paint
    2. Karki combats
    3. Rippling muscles
    4. Perfect hair

     

    Baby Jane Hudson and Blanche Hudson


    What Ever Happened To Baby Jane is probably one of the campiest movies of all time – and a sure-fire way to win any “best Halloween costume” competition.

    All you need is:

    Baby Jane

    1. Pretty white frilly dress
    2. Ribbon for the waist
    3. Blonde wig
    4. Overdone lippy
    5. Set of car keys

    Blanche

    1. Dark wig
    2. All black outfit
    3. Wheelchair
    4. Overdone lippy
    5. Tire marks from obvious car accident

     

  • 12 Amazing coming out YouTube videos

    To celebrate National Coming Out Day 2017, we’re enjoying the best coming out videos on YouTube.

    Taking to YouTube is now one of the best ways for stars to talk directly to their fans, especially about painful or personal experiences. Their stories are told in their own voice and there’s no distortion of the truth. Here are the Top 12 coming out videos on Youtube

    These brave men and women made the decision to come out on their own terms and we applaud them.

    Matt And Blue, Actor and Musician

    434,286 views


    Despite coming out through a Twitter post back in 2013, Matt Dallas and his partner Blue Hamilton decided to make a coming out video to talk about the how’s, the why’s and the everything’s… Super cute and really fun.

     

    George Shelley, Union J Singer

    525,096 views

    Before it was removed, Union J singer George Shelley, posted a video telling his fans he had something he wanted to talk about. In his video he says that he’s attracted to men and women and that labels like gay or bi were “old fashioned”.

     

    Billy Gillman, Singer

    1,077,637 views


    Just days after fellow country singer Ty Herndon came out, Billy Gillman made this emotional YouTube video. In the five and a half minute video the vocalist talked about life with his partner and his difficultly with major record labels wanting to re-sign him, despite selling 5 million records.

    Daniel Newman, Actor

    2,330,031 views

    When an actor comes out, it’s big news, when the show that he on is one of the biggest shows on the planet, it’s MASSIVE news. Daniel Newman came out this year, in a video he titled, #OutAndProud.

     

    Lucas Cruickshank, YouTuber

    5,274,279 views


    In possibly the most fun coming out video Lucas literally burst out of the closet and into the open after one fan asked the simple question “are you gay”.

     

    Troye Sivan, X Men Actor turned singer

    7,629,630 views


    X Men actor Troye came out on YouTube at the age of 18 in 2013. In his emotional video he said,

    “I’m terrified. I know that some people are going to have a problem with this. This could kind of change everything for me, but it shouldn’t have to. And that’s why I’m making this video, and that’s why I think it’s important for people to make these kinds of videos.”

    Shane Dawson, YouTuber

    9,034,704 views


    In 2015 Shane Dawson came out as bisexual in a video that has now been seen over 7 million times. He said, emotionally,

    “This is a really hard video to make. I’m really scared… I never thought I would be making this, ever. I woke up this morning and I just had to.

    “I’m making this video because I feel like it could help a lot of people. Over the last year, I’ve been extremely sexually confused.

    “I always wished that I was gay, that I was just 100 percent gay. It would be a lot easier to be accepted by people… but I’m not.

     

    Joey Graceffa, YouTuber

    7,910,702 views


    Gorgeous Joey came out on YouTube as gay in 2015. He went on to release a music video which featured a pretty hot, non heteronormative story line of princes falling in love with each other.

     

    Connor Franta, YouTuber,

    11,776,973 views


    Connor Franta’s coming out video made mainstream news. In a video simply named “Coming Out” the YouTuber told his 3.6 subscribers that he was gay, saying,

    “I’m sitting here with no script, no plan, no fancy editing, and I’m just gonna be really honest,”

    Tom Daley, Diver,

    12,263,378 views


    The Olympic champion diver took to YouTube at the end of 2013 to say that he was in a relationship with a man. He described the posting of the video as a “hard decision to make” but ultimately he wanted his fans to hear it directly from him.

    Ingrid Nilsen, YouTuber.

    16,886,975 views


    Ingrid came out as gay in 2015 in a highly emotional video and is to date the second most viewed coming out YouTube video, which might be down to the fact that the vlogger has nearly 4 million subscribers.

     

    The Rhodes Bros

    25,014,703 views


    Reaching out far ahead of any other YouTube coming out video is the Rhodes’ twins coming out as gay to their father on the phone. The video had huge media pick up which help ratchet the views to over 21 million.

  • 10 reasons why Atypical is a must view on Netflix

    Atypical is a coming of age story that follows Sam (played by Keir Gilchrist), an 18-year-old on the autistic spectrum as he searches for love and independence.

    1) Autism is so rarely discussed in the mainstream that Atypical is a necessary step in the right direction to showcase different types of people.

    Although the show has attracted a fair bit of criticism, Robin Steward from inews.co.uk says, “Any show about autism, which isn’t widely understood, carries a tremendous burden: people want it to say everything and get it ‘right’. We’re going to need more shows of varying kinds that feature autism in all different ways before there’s a full expression of autism across the spectrum. There are grounds to criticise Atypical, but I’ve chosen to welcome it as one more step in the right direction”.

    Considering over 700,000 people in the UK are believed to be living with Autism this is long overdue.

    2) It actually makes you stop for a moment to realise that not everybody that you come into contact with on a daily basis has the same mindset as you… and that’s okay.

    3) Keir Gilchrist, who plays Sam in the show is really quite cute! Shallow I know.

    4) In the midst of so much dark teen drama (13 Reasons Why, Riverdale et al) Atypical is a breath of fresh air.

    5) It’s really very sex positive. Although the parents aren’t all too happy at their kids’ shenanigans – the overreaching plot arch is positive.

    6) It’s not perfect but that’s okay, neither is life.

    7) It celebrates someone literally atypical and his time in high school.

    Sam is not popular, he’s not a jock and he doesn’t have a cheerleader girlfriend… As a gay guy, I can totally relate to that.

    8) It covers all the bases of teenage and family life – in one eight-episode series… Adultery, identity, virginity, first dates and crushes.

    9) Oh and Raúl Castillo is basic beefcake.

    10) Short but sweet. Atypical leaves you wanting more – as it only has 8 episodes and they are 30 minuters.

  • 10 completely unreasonable expectations we have because of gay porn

    A lot goes into that 2-minute clip you watch on Twitter!

    Doesn’t it all just seem a bit too easy?

    Ramming it in

    Okay, whoah there cowboy – unlike in porn, you can’t just ram it in – unless you want a bitch slap that would make a Dynasty diva look like a Carebear. Tops – be kind to your bottom. Warm that lad up. Ways to get the fires burning include: fingering, rimming or what we call the Push N Pop are all good ways to get started… oh if you’re wondering a Push N Pop is where you put a little bit in and then taking it out again.

    Oh all of the groaning

    So much groaning – all the groaning… It’s like the less relaxing, hornier version of Whale song. Okay here’s the thing, some guys aren’t moaners and groaners. Some find it embarrassing – but you can do a bit of dirty talking. If you’re wondering what to say, check out some of our tips on what to say during sex.

    Going at it for hours and hours

    Some porn scene seems to go on for ages, which they actually do. Remember you’re seeing edited highlights. The actual scene probably lasted hours but these guys take a long time to warm up – and use a tonne of lube… which takes us on to the next point?

    Where’s the lube?

    So sometimes you see a top giving a quick dash of lube on the end of his Johnson – and maybe the bottom gives his ass a sniff of ID – but wait – you need waaaaay more than that. Get yourself a big old bottle of lube and keep it handy – next to the bed so you can keep on going.

    Tired tops

    It seems as those these tops can keep on going for hours. You definitely need to build up your stamina if you’re going to be a top that can fulfil a Power Bottom‘s needs.

    Abtastics

    How is it that almost every guy in porn is white, hairless, slim and or muscled? It’s such a narrow view of the world. In life such conformity doesn’t exist – we are all shapes and sizes, colours and some are actually hairy AF – which is cool.

    Gymnastics

    How is he… where is his… Wait when… what is that? If you need to brush up on some sex positions that punch above the rest we suggest you take a look at how to turn normal sex position into iconic sex positions.

    No mess

    Rarely do you see mess (and by that we mean poop) in porn – and probably, that’s a good thing. Actually, that’s a really good thing, unless of course scat is your thing. The body has a habit of doing things – and making sounds at the most inopportune times. Such is life. You can laugh it off – or go grab a shower if things get a little too messy.

    Window shenanigans…

    There’s a lot of porn going on in windows – which is fine if you’re on the 38th floor looking down 5th Avenue – not so good when your outlook is poor old Mrs Greeves from number 46 – doing her knitting. Won’t somebody think of her cats.

    Everyone’s so big…

    It seems as though you can’t work in porn unless your penis is big enough to give you a mild fainting feeling every time you get an erection due to substantial blood loss. What is with that – what about the normal size… you know this one…

  • REVIEW | George Michael Fantasy

    When the announcement that there would be new George Michael music… I was terrified, disappointed, excited and desperate in equal measure.

    You see, usually the release of the previously unheard of material or remixed material never does the memories of a dearly departed icon, such as George Michael, justice.

    I was, I’m loathed to admit, disappointed with Michael’s latest work –  2012’s “White Light” was, to me, terrible. He launched it during the closing ceremony of the UK Olympics – and well, it didn’t quite hit the spot. Even after the massive exposure, the song limped to number 20 in the iTunes chart.

    It was a far cry from his works on Older, Patience or Faith albums. And maybe that’s the problem with George Michael (or us, his fans) – he’ll always be revered for his 80s and 90s output and that’s why today’s release is genius.

    Nile Rodger’s reworking of “Fantasy” restores the vision and with a contemporary sensibility. It’s sexual, edgy and unmistakably George’s work.

    The song’s choppy, edgy production sits well along with current hits – but it’s unmistakable in its George Michealness – the Faith era rips right through it, which will be sure to please hardcore GM fans whilst opening up his music to an entirely new generation of fans.

    Nile Rodgers proves, once again, that he is the producer, not only of the 70s, 80s and 90s but is – without a doubt giving this generation of producers a run for their money.

     

  • DVD REVIEW | Shortbus

    ★★★★★ | Shortbus

    You’ll never look at a splatter painting in the way away again.

    If you’ve ever wondered what it would feel like to have your face stuffed into a film’s never regions, then Shortbus is the film for you to see. Stat.

    Director John Cameron Mitchell (Hedwig And The Angry Inch) bravely circumnavigates the world of sexuality in this stylish, almost uncomplicated observation of sexual dysfunction.

    “Shortbus” is a New York club where the focus is sexual liberation with a heady blend of punters. Transgender people, ageing homosexuals, hot young boys, a straight female sex therapist all looking to get their rocks off – a bit like Piccadilly on a Thursday night but more scintillating.

    The creators and actors of Shortbus have genuinely created and sustained characters the viewer can befriend and have some feeling for.  You can feel that the actual actors forged a real relationship with each other, which gathering from the DVD’s ‘extras’ they had to, as part of the film development process was having sexual relations with each other.

    Shortbus did give me a tingling sensation. Not just because you get to see: self-sucking, a blinding rim job, a 3-way, the national anthem sung into a sizable cock and Mr Cameron-Mitchell himself being sucked off by a supporting actor (no really) but it caused me to think of my own sexuality and my relationship to it.

    Sex is ‘in your face.’ It is about sexual roles. It’s about ‘this moment, now’. Being British, and naturally reserved such talk and this movie is better left after two bottles of Chablis and a handful of bar nuts.

    Some fantastic performances and an introduction to one Jay Brannan – who I suggest you get yourself into – socially so to speak. He has a Facebook, twitter, albums and tours his music about regularly.

    If you’re sexually revolutionised you might watch this and think, what’s all the fuss about, but worth a punt anyway. You can always pass it off as porn with a story line and real actors.

    If you’re a fan of the slightly psychedelic, smash colour, animatic world of John Cameron Mitchell you’ll love this movie. It isn’t one, however, to watch with your Mother. You get to see quite a bit of peen!

    Available to buy on AMAZON

  • Is it normal to bleed after anal sex?

    Is it normal to bleed after anal sex?

    Myths persist – but here’s what you need to know if you’re bleeding after anal sex.

    (C) BIGSTOCK / Depositphotos

    Anal sex can be an integral part of a sexual relationship, but not all couples do it – however, there’s a lot of wrong information out there about bottoming.

    Bleeding after anal sex can be just ‘one of those things’ and can happen on your first go round or your 100th – so to put your mind and butt at rest, here’s why it happens.

    Tiny rips happen

    Your rectum is not self-lubricating, so unless you’re using lube, you’re going to be creating a lot of friction, which can cause the lining of the rectum to tear or rip a little, if this sounds hideous, it might be worth noting that most of these rips are tiny – and can actually happen outside of sex as well. These rips can cause bleeds – and most probably you’ve had bleeds but never realised it.

    It happens because the lining of your rectum is not as strong as your normal skin.

    Also, anal sex could also be causing what is known as an anal fissure. Anal fissures are tiny rips that can happen both on the inside and on and around your actual hole – especially if you’re not relaxed or have not loosened yourself up before the main event. These can heal all by themselves within a few weeks.

    The P Word…

    Do piles bleed after anal sex?

    Another issue is the dreaded P word – yes piles.

    Bleeds may be caused by popping a pile or if we’re going to be medical about it, haemorrhoids.  Piles are completely normal and are the enlargement of a blood vessel that already exists inside your butt. You might not even know you have one until it pops during sex.

    Some people have visible piles on the outside of the anus, whilst some have them on the inside.

    There’s no evidence to show that having anal sex causes piles but it can inflame the issue.

    Jose Perez de la Cruz from THT told us, “So long as the piles are not actively bleeding or painful at the time on intercourse then it is probably safe to have sex. If they are bleeding or there is inflammation though this means that the natural protective barrier formed by the skin and mucous membranes is not at its optimum which if exposed to an STI can make transmission more likely”.

    “So long as the piles are not actively bleeding or painful at the time on intercourse then it is probably safe to have sex. If they are bleeding or there is inflammation though this means that the natural protective barrier formed by the skin and mucous membranes is not at its optimum which is exposed to an STI can make transmission more likely”.

    If you’re suffering from haemorrhoids you can buy Preparation H or Germaloids online and this should help ease them away and give yourself a few days rest from sex to help you heal.

    Should I go to the doctor if I bleed from my bum

    When should I seek help?

    If you are experiencing a lot of pain or prolonged aching after sex you might need to seek medical help. It is normal for there to be some discomfort for a day after, especially after your first time. However, if pain continues you should go and see your GP or book yourself into a sexual health clinic.

    If there is a lot of blood (think steady drip rather than a bit of spotting on your toilet paper) you should go and see your doc ASAP.

    Dr Shawn Khodadadian, a board-certified gastroenterologist in Manhattan, is cautioning people against ignoring rectal bleeding. He warns that rectal bleeding could be a sign of other, far more serious illness such as colorectal or colon cancer. He said,

     “as there are many possible causes and getting an early diagnosis is particularly important. This is because although rectal bleeding can be a symptom of haemorrhoids, colitis or anal fissures, it can also be a sign of a far more serious illness for example colorectal or colon cancer. These types of cancers can often be completely cured when detected early.”

    You’re gonna need lube and lots of it

    Will lube stop anal bleeding?

    So the best way to stop the friction is to use lube a lot of it. You can find out about the different types of lube here. If you’re having a long session – they don’t forget to keep reapplying the lube or use a silicone-based lube, which should last a lot longer.

    Remember, despite what you see in gay porn, you can just ram it in. You need to take your time, use lube and go an inch at a time!

    Good luck and have fun!

  • AUSTRALIA, Here’s 11 things that failed to happen when same-sex marriage became law

    So much happened… but at the same time so little did!

    We thought we’d take a look at what HASN’T happened since marriage between two people of the same gender got the right to be treated like everyone else. Despite the warnings from right wing, religious fundamentalists these are the things that have failed to happen.

    1) The sanctity of straight marriage will crumble, wilt and die.

    Except of course for divorce, which has always been a bit of blight on the ‘death-do-us-part’ bit of marriage

    2) The floods…

    Won’t somebody think of the floods and the pestilence, the fire and brimstone? Some UKIPPER, whose name I can’t remember, not really care to remember said that gay marriage would bring about lots and lots of rain, of a Noah and Ark amount. Okay, there has been a little more precipitation than usual scientists are putting that down to global warming rather than gay marriage, because you know, that’s actually what’s happening…

    3) Children are still being born in and out of wedlock.

    The world realised that you don’t need a man and a woman to marry in order to have kids. Children are still being born, they are still being educated, fed and loved by their parents. Bob and Fred getting hitched at the end of the road had no impact on parents being able to have children – and actually, people understand that you don’t need to be married to make children – there isn’t a switch that is suddenly turned on when you say “I Do”.

    4) Pastor Rich Scarbrough didn’t combust or set himself on fire.

    Yep, this saint of a Christian man threatened to set himself on fire if marriage equality passed. We’ve been waiting patiently with a fire blanket in hand, but nothing. Not even a puff of smoke.

    5) Parents will have no say in the sex ed that their kids are taught in school…

    Well they do… and if you don’t want little Joanie to find out that actually what she’s feeling is totally normal, rather than her hiding away, feeling shame and alone – then perhaps you need to look at your parenting credentials.

    6) Equal rights for gays, bis and lesbians

    Even though we have marriage equality, we’re still not actually legally equal. Non-consummation doesn’t count (meaning basically that the law doesn’t recognise gay sex as equal to straight sex) for grounds for divorce…

    7) Bakers will be forced to make gay cakes.

    In the UK you can’t discriminate against people because of their sexuality or gender identity – but you can just refuse an order and not give a reason… So if you’re still a total f*ckwit bigot you still have your rights, you just have to be quiet about them, but actually when you do, it lets us all know to avoid you like the plague.

    8) Churches will be forced to have gay marriages.

    Nope. We’re still not allowed to get married in your sacred places. But we can come and be a guest and totally upstage your day with how fabulous we are. Especially if we start on the white wine before the first note of “Here Comes The Bride” starts.

    9) Man will be able to marry his pets

    Nope still not legal. And dear god Mary, why are you even thinking about animals marrying?

    10) Straight marriage will carry less kudos.

    People were concerned that gay marriage would cheapen the brand. Not like Britney’s 55-hour marriage.

    11) The world’s end

    Those fascinating people (read in a sarcastic tone) at the Westboro Baptist Church said that we’d all die and go to hell, but as I sit here – in Cashmere and I look out of the window, we’re still very much here.

  • Top Summer Gin Recipes

    For all you gin lovers out there we’ve compiled a collection of five simple recipes, with the help of some friends, to get you through the long summer of outdoor dining and socials. Your soirée is guaranteed to become a much talked about success with these tempting tipples, especially when (like me) all you’ve served in the past has been a can of shop bought premix, garnished with a bit of left over celery leaf from last night’s salad. Enjoy.

     

    Hayman’s Lavender Lady

    The Lavender Lady is the Hayman’s take on the traditional sour White Lady cocktail. The egg white creates a silky mixture, which perfectly accompanies the honey and Cointreau. Top the cocktail with a sprig of Lavender, and sit back in the garden and relax.

    Ingredients:
    50ml Hayman’s London Dry Gin
    20ml freshly squeezed lemon juice
    10ml of locally sourced honey or 20ml of honey water (see below)
    10ml Cointreau
    1 medium egg white
    Dash of orange bitters
    Sprig of lavender to garnish

    Honey water:
    Combine equal parts of honey and hot water
    Stir until mixed

    Method:
    – Add cubed ice to a cocktail shaker
    – Pour the Hayman’s London Dry Gin over the ice
    – Add all the remaining ingredients, except the garnish
    – Give all the ingredients a very hard shake and strain into cocktail glass
    – Garnish with a sprig of lavender

     

    British Bramble

    Langley’s English gin brings us the best of British with this take on the Bramble. Made using classic English gin, Langley’s No. 8, and premium British blackcurrant liqueur, British Cassis, this is a versatile drink that’s ideal to enjoy on a hot (or rainy) summer day. One sip and you’ll soon be foraging for more.

    Ingredients:
    60ml Langley’s No. 8 gin
    30ml Lemon Juice
    15ml British Cassis
    10ml of sugar syrup

    Method:
    – Pour Langley’s No. 8 gin, lemon juice and sugar syrup into your shaker, half-fill with ice, and shake until ice cold.
    – Strain into a rock glass filled with crushed ice
    – Drizzle British Cassis over the top so it trickles through the ice
    – Garnish with fresh blackberries and a slice of lemon

     

    Coconut Ramos

    Mr Lyan says: “In the original recipe that inspired me, Ramos Gin Fizz, the drink was reputedly shaken for five minutes solid to get it to what was described as ‘drinking clouds’. Apparently, it took 18 bartenders standing in a line taking over from each other when their arms began to ache. In this recipe I’ve used a soda siphon – you ‘charge’ it with nitrogen and CO2 to whip air in!” Recipe from Ryan’s book: Good Things to Drink with Mr Lyan & Friends. Images courtesy of Waitrose.com.

    Ingredients:
    250ml London Dry Gin
    120ml lemon juice
    150ml rice milk
    90ml Waitrose Cooks’ Ingredients Organic Coconut Cream
    150ml cold water
    120ml egg white
    50ml sugar syrup
    2 dashes orange blossom water
    1 dash rose water

    Method:
    – Whisk all the ingredients together and then add to a soda siphon.
    – Charge with one bulb of nitrogen and one bulb of CO2.
    – Pour into chilled flutes and garnish with candied ginger.

     

    Hayman’s Victorian Mojito

    Ingredients:
    50ml Hayman’s London Dry Gin
    25ml freshly squeezed lime juice
    20ml sugar syrup
    Premium tonic water or soda water
    Freshly picked mint leaves

    Method:
    – Fill a highball glass with cracked or crushed ice and a few fresh mint leaves
    – Pour in the Hayman’s London Dry Gin and let it run down over the ice
    – Add the lime juice and sugar syrup
    – Churn vigorously ensuring the ingredients are well mixed
    – Top with the tonic water or soda water
    – Garnish with a mint sprig

     

    Diamond Southside

    Mr Lyan says: “With lots of fruity flavours, this is a great summer cocktail – it’s light and really refreshing. Crushed ice is good for tempering sweet or sharp drinks.” Images courtesy of Waitrose.com.

    Ingredients:
    50ml London Dry Gin
    Splash of lime juice
    6 mint leaves
    30ml cloudy apple juice
    10ml rhubarb and lavender syrup*
    Strip of cucumber

    Method:
    – Build over crushed ice in a wine glass. Add more crushed ice and garnish with a sprig of mint.

    *To make a flavoured syrup, bring one part water to two parts sugar to the boil. Turn off and add your flavours while the syrup is still warm. As the syrup cools it extracts the flavour from whatever you have added. Much like cooking, keep tasting until you have the right balance. Keep in a sealed container in the fridge for 2-3 weeks.