Sexually transmitted diseases surged to a record high in the United States last year, with more than two million cases of chlamydia, gonorrhea and syphilis nationwide, officials said Tuesday. This was “the highest number ever,” said the annual Sexually Transmitted Disease Surveillance Report released today by the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). Most… (more…)
Dr Dannii Cohen reveals how you can make even the most stubborn of a homophobic family turn to acceptance.
Having the approval of your parents means a lot to (almost) every child.
So wanting them to approve of the other most important person in your life is natural. The story of parents not approving of their children’s partner (whether in straight or LGBT relationships) is as old as time and there truly is no quick fix solution.
Do not: feel you have to take sides, force your parents or stir arguments.
Do: Insist your partner needs to be included and stand up for him/her.
Find ways to try and get conversations going, take some cues and advice from this article: http://yourzengrowth.com/asking-giving-opinion/
For the rest, only time can heal this one. Human emotions cannot be forced.
Have you got a dilemma you’d like us to answer? Click here to visit our dilemmas page.
Millions could be leaving themselves open to skin infections, respiratory infections and even food poisoning.
A test of surfaces touched daily by commuters and tourists on London’s tube system was commissioned by Coldzyme to highlight the number of germs and bacteria we come into contact with every day.
A commuter used the Tube wearing a white glove and touched surfaces such as chip and pins pads on ticket machines, handrails on escalators and stairs and grab-handles in tube carriages.
Dr Jacob Malone, joint group leader at the university for East Anglia and the John Innes Centre then analysed the glove and found a mixture of bacteria and fungi.
Among the bugs found were bacteria from the Staphylococcus species, including S. aureus – which can cause skin infections, respiratory infections such as sinusitis and food poisoning.
Bacteria from the Pseudomonas species was also identified, including P. aeruginosa, which is a common, opportunistic pathogen.
While it’s not generally a threat to healthy people, it can cause infections in those whose immune systems are weakened or compromised in some way.
There were also some other proteobacterial species such as Escherichia coli and Salmonella, of which some can cause diseases such as food poisoning, although many do not do this.
Several different fungi, which are spread by spores floating around in the air and on surfaces, were also found.
Dr Jacob Malone, said: “The range of bacterial species we isolated was quite large, with many different species, and many shapes, sizes and colours of colonies present.
“The bacterial colonies we see on the plates only represent a tiny subset of the different species that were likely to be present in each case, as the vast majority of bacterial species cannot be grown up in the lab.
“What we found was totally normal for any set of surfaces that come into contact with people daily.
“The whole world is teeming with bacteria and fungi, and this is a normal and healthy situation.
“Only a small fraction of the bacteria in any environment are dangerous, and even then, only in specific situations.
“Obviously, people should exercise proper care and attention, and I would not recommend eating food that has dropped on the subway floor or licking the furniture, but there is no particular cause for alarm.”
A spokesman for Coldzyme added: “As we go about our day-to-day lives, we come into contact with a host of germs and bacteria, particularly in public spaces such as the transport network or our work places.
“Whether it’s a bacteria that can cause an infection or sickness bug or a simple cold virus, any one of them has the potential to leave to feeling at least a little under the weather.
“Protecting yourself as much as possible from the harmful germs and bacteria is the best defence, by doing things such as wearing gloves, covering your mouth and nose when your sneeze and washing your hands regularly.
by Gemma Francis
A small percentage of men find that their penises will start to bend or curve, Jackie Hall, Health at Hand operations manager at AXA PPP healthcare gives us some insight into the condition known as Peyronie’s disease.
About 5 percent of men over the age of 50 will develop a condition of the penis called Peyronie’s disease. This is a benign but potentially emotionally upsetting condition in which scar tissue develops on the shaft of the penis sometimes resulting in a penile bend noticeable with erections.
This can lead to sexual dysfunction with in some cases the affected man avoiding a sexual relationship altogether.
A proportion of affected men will find erections and intercourse too painful although others will simply notice a lump on the shaft of the penis or a minor painless penile bend which does not cause too much trouble.
Unfortunately there are no really effective cures for this condition, however, we recommend visiting a GP for a more detailed assessment.
A twenty-three-year-old man has been left unable to get an erection, after being scratched by a cat.
The man, who lives in Belgium has been left impotent, at the age of 23, after a scratch by a cat left him with a potentially life-threatening disease. The man’s cat had given him “cat scratch disease” according to BMJ Case Reports.
Cat Scratch Disease (CSD) is caused by a bacteria called Bartonella henselae which can leave those infected with fevers, swollen lymph nodes and can even become fatal if there are complications reports the Sun.
The bacteria can be found on the claws and in the mouths of cats.
The victim went to his doctors after developing a pain in his testicles and unable to get an erection. On further investigation, it was revealed that he had been clawed by a cat in his home.
Doctors were able to save the patient’s erections, but only by taking swift action and putting him on a course of antibiotics. He was cured in three weeks.
Writing in the report, Doctor’s said, “The symptoms quickly vanished and he fully regained his erectile function.
“In this case, the patient was unable to provoke erection despite his will even during periods of calm symptoms.”
According to the Sun, around 12,000 Americans have been diagnosed with CSD. Victims suffer fever, fatigue, headaches and swollen lymph nodes. Of those diagnosed, 500 needed hospital treatment.
So think twice before letting your cat lick you or scratch you. You should also wash your hands or open wounds thoroughly.
From Nowtso.com
Dear Dr Dannii
I have been with my hubby for 14 years and I know I was his first love.
Recently I was incarcerated and did six months in jail away from my love and he cheated on me with a sex worker, who turned out to be male. We have two children under 10 and I know he’s been bringing in sex workers and drug users into our home whilst the kids are there.
He also has hacked my phone, so he can listen to my conservations, even when I’m not using it. I haven’t cheated on him so I have no idea what to do next.
I feel every time I go out he cheats on me and I don’t want him to pass on any STDs to me. We’ve talk about working this through and he says he’ll change, but I can’t and don’t want to live with a guy who can’t be faithful.
Sandi,
(Message edited for clarity and length)
Dear Sandi,
Your message was long and a bit unclear in some parts, but I understood what you were trying to say, and how much you have been through.
Please do not stay in the situation that you are in. You are clearly unhappy and it is obvious that your partner has no consideration for your feelings at all. I am sorry to be so blunt, but this will not change. I believe I understood you have children, if so this can not be a healthy situation for any young people to be in.
Please try and get the necessary help (including any protection you might need!) and build a new life for you and your children and stop waiting for others to change.
Your first stop should be to social services or give Family Lives (0808 800 2222) a call to talk through your problem. It sounds like you need some guidance from people who can help tackle your issues head on. It might be good check out the woman’s website over at Shelter, who have some brilliant advice for women in need of refuge.
The other thing to consider and it all depends on your family and friendship connections – but do you have parents, family or friends you can call on to help you, even if it’s to leave the house with your children for a while and get them out of that toxic environment?
If you are concerned about your sexual health, you should book yourself in with your GP or a sexual health clinic.
You have dealt with so much already, so you are strong enough to make it through.
Have you got a dilemma you’d like to ask our experts?
Got an issue you’d like us to explore fill in the form below.
Anal sex can be an integral part of a sexual relationship, but not all couples do it – however, there’s a lot of wrong information out there about bottoming.
Bleeding after anal sex can be just ‘one of those things’ and can happen on your first go round or your 100th – so to put your mind and butt at rest, here’s why it happens.
Your rectum is not self-lubricating, so unless you’re using lube, you’re going to be creating a lot of friction, which can cause the lining of the rectum to tear or rip a little, if this sounds hideous, it might be worth noting that most of these rips are tiny – and can actually happen outside of sex as well. These rips can cause bleeds – and most probably you’ve had bleeds but never realised it.
It happens because the lining of your rectum is not as strong as your normal skin.
Also, anal sex could also be causing what is known as an anal fissure. Anal fissures are tiny rips that can happen both on the inside and on and around your actual hole – especially if you’re not relaxed or have not loosened yourself up before the main event. These can heal all by themselves within a few weeks.
Another issue is the dreaded P word – yes piles.
Bleeds may be caused by popping a pile or if we’re going to be medical about it, haemorrhoids. Piles are completely normal and are the enlargement of a blood vessel that already exists inside your butt. You might not even know you have one until it pops during sex.
Some people have visible piles on the outside of the anus, whilst some have them on the inside.
There’s no evidence to show that having anal sex causes piles but it can inflame the issue.
Jose Perez de la Cruz from THT told us, “So long as the piles are not actively bleeding or painful at the time on intercourse then it is probably safe to have sex. If they are bleeding or there is inflammation though this means that the natural protective barrier formed by the skin and mucous membranes is not at its optimum which if exposed to an STI can make transmission more likely”.
“So long as the piles are not actively bleeding or painful at the time on intercourse then it is probably safe to have sex. If they are bleeding or there is inflammation though this means that the natural protective barrier formed by the skin and mucous membranes is not at its optimum which is exposed to an STI can make transmission more likely”.
If you’re suffering from haemorrhoids you can buy Preparation H or Germaloids online and this should help ease them away and give yourself a few days rest from sex to help you heal.
If you are experiencing a lot of pain or prolonged aching after sex you might need to seek medical help. It is normal for there to be some discomfort for a day after, especially after your first time. However, if pain continues you should go and see your GP or book yourself into a sexual health clinic.
If there is a lot of blood (think steady drip rather than a bit of spotting on your toilet paper) you should go and see your doc ASAP.
Dr Shawn Khodadadian, a board-certified gastroenterologist in Manhattan, is cautioning people against ignoring rectal bleeding. He warns that rectal bleeding could be a sign of other, far more serious illness such as colorectal or colon cancer. He said,
“as there are many possible causes and getting an early diagnosis is particularly important. This is because although rectal bleeding can be a symptom of haemorrhoids, colitis or anal fissures, it can also be a sign of a far more serious illness for example colorectal or colon cancer. These types of cancers can often be completely cured when detected early.”
So the best way to stop the friction is to use lube a lot of it. You can find out about the different types of lube here. If you’re having a long session – they don’t forget to keep reapplying the lube or use a silicone-based lube, which should last a lot longer.
Remember, despite what you see in gay porn, you can just ram it in. You need to take your time, use lube and go an inch at a time!
Good luck and have fun!
Dear TGUK,
I recently hooked up with a guy I know to be promiscuous, we got drunk and he ended up f**king me bareback and I had some blood down there the next day. I’m desperate to get PrEP, as even though he says he’s HIV negative, how can I be sure? I don’t normally take risks, but this time I slipped up.
Please help!
Sam (name changed)
Hi Sam,
If you’re worried about your status you should visit a sexual health clinic right away or an A&E department, who also can prescribe the Post-exposure prophylaxis drugs (PEP). It is a course of drugs which lasts up to 28 days. It is effective at stopping the HIV virus up 72 hours after exposure.
You will need to explain to the doctors why you think you need the treatment and they will assess the likelihood of your exposure to the virus.
Bareback sex carries a high risk to HIV exposure, but also to a variety of other infections, which can all be very nasty and may not show symptoms. You say that the guy said that he was HIV negative, but when was the last time he was tested and was he telling the truth? You can never be sure, which is why it’s important for you to take responsibility for your own health. If he’s had unprotected sex with you and you say he’s known for being promiscuous the likelihood of him having unprotected sex with others is very high.
Make sure you ask your doctor or sexual health professional about the side-effects of PEP.
As for the blood you mentioned, the anus is filled with veins and delicate capillaries, which can get damaged during sex. You may want to check that you don’t have piles and if you do there are many over the counter remedies for these. If you’re worried or concerned see your GP.
Remember unless you 100% trust someone wrap it up.
Visiting a sex health clinic is an important part of life, taking responsibility for your health and for others you’re having sex with. Making regular visits every six months to once a year is suggested if you’re sexually active.
Did you know you can order an at-home HIV test online? Click here to buy one
ALSO READ: Why does my foreskin smell?
ALSO READ: Do I wank too much?
The advice given in this article is for guidance only and you should always seek your own independent, professional medical advice from your own GP if you are concerned about your health.
OTHER QUESTIONS: HIV | WILLY WONDERS | HOLES | DOING IT | STIs | LUMPS & BUMPS | BACK TO SEX CLINIC HOME PAGE
Got a problem you’d like advice on?
Dear TGUK.
I’ve been with my boyfriend for about 3 years. Over the past few weeks we have been rowing constantly. He hadn’t been with any guys before me and felt that he’d missed out on a lot. He says he loves me but needs more. He’s suggested that we have an open relation and that we’re both free to go with other men. I’m not interested in sleeping with anyone else. I’m not sure if it’s what I want from a relationship but I’m afraid if I don’t agree to it, he’ll just cheat on me and leave anyway? If I do agree to it, he might meet someone else.
Jack
Hi Jack,
It sounds like there is a lot happening for your relationship right now. All relationships, family sexual or romantic, go through changes and have to adapt along with the people in them. As part of this we need to renegotiate the terms and what we want from them. Although this may sound very cold and logical, of course isn’t when it comes relationships.
From what you say. It sounds like your boyfriend is still exploring his own sexual identity, you were the first person he slept with and has been faithful to for the past three years. He is keen to experience sex with other guys but he still wants the security and intimacy that he obviously gets from being with you.
The good news is you are both talking clearly about what you want. The channels of communication are very much open. You’ve discussed opening the relationship and the ramifications but has he said specifically what he’s missed out? It may be worth seeing if there is a specific aspect of sex that he wants to experiment. It may be something that you may want to try.
It sounds like from your letter that you are not keen on the concept of an open relationship and that you would have insecurities about where it would lead. However you have also not dismissed the concept outright. This needs to be given equal weight in your discussion. As much as he has the desire to change the relationship, it’s ok if you don’t want to.
It feels like it would be a good decision for you to talk clearly about the practicalities of it. Would he tell the men that he is in an open relationship? Will you discuss who, where and when? Would you do this before or after? In terms of the guys he will be meeting, would they just be one off encounters? Safe sex is also a vital part of this discussion. From doing this it will help you to make a decision based on fact and not from fear.
As I said earlier, all relationships will change and adapt. The discussion about opening the relationship is fluid. It may be the case that you try being open. If it doesn’t work for you, then you can always bring this back to the table, you can always discuss closing the relationship again. Open relationships aren’t for everyone; they require a high degree of trust and understanding. Hopefully it gives both partners what they need to feel fulfilled.
Have you got a dilemma you’d like us to answer? Click here to visit our dilemmas page.
An otherwise healthy 30-year-old man has died after complications during an operation to enlarge the length and girth of his penis. Despite the regularity at which this type of operation is now done, the medical team ran into issues half way through the procedure, the Journal of Forensic Sciences reported.
This is the first time anyone has died in a penile enlargement surgery. There are around 8400 surgeries of this kind undertaken every year.
The surgeons were on to the girth section of the surgery, where the patient’s own fat cells are injected into the penis. Around 2 ounces of his own fat were injected when the fat leaked into his blood stream.
The patient then suffered a lung embolism which led to him having a cardiac arrest. Despite CPR efforts from the doctors, they were unable to save him. The man died after two hours.
“This is the first described case where a seemingly simple and safe procedure of penis enlargement by autologous fat transfer caused sudden death in a healthy young man,
“Perhaps the risk of fat embolization is higher when pretraumatized tissue is subjected to fat injection, like in this case, where a penis elongation by loosening of a penile ligament was performed before the fat injection.”
If you’ve never heard of sounding – basically it where you stick a metal or glass rod down the opening of the penis into the urethra. However, doctors have warned that the practice of sounding could cause irreparable damage to the penis.
Doctors at International Andrology, a central London clinic focusing exclusively on male urogenital health have seen a dramatic increase in the number of men presenting with urethral issues and infections in line with the rise in this sexual practice.
The urethra sometimes referred to as the water-pipe, is the tube running along the penis, through which urine and sperm pass. A stricture, described as ‘a kink in a hose’, develops when the urethra is damaged leading to severe urination problems, pain and recurrent infections. It’s a dilapidating condition, that usually requires surgical intervention.
“Sounding” can also lead to incontinence since loosening or damaging of the urethra can result in reduced bladder control.
“Urethral strictures are more common in older men, especially after the insertion of a catheter following prostate surgery, however, we have been seeing an increased number of younger patients suffering from strictures, which we attribute to the popularity of practices like sounding,” Mr Giulio Garaffa, a surgeon at International Andrology London comments.
“Men should be really careful with such practices – only a few urologists have experience treating urethral strictures and in some cases, multiple operations might be required to fix the problem,” Mr Garaffa warns.
Men interested in this activity should first understand the issues with introducing objects into the urethral and embrace clean practices such as cleaning items regularly and using lubrications specially designed for sensitive areas.
