So the pope is now on Twitter.

All we need… another homophobic opinionated pr**k on the internet.

Anyway, it’s Christmas time! Let us not forget the true meaning of this festive period… A celebration allowing us to enjoy Advocaat without judgement and at pretty much any hour.
What are you up to this Christmas?
*Feigns interest*
Oh lovely.
Earlier this week, I was on a bus, and I did the UNTHINKABLE. I caught the bus at 3pm. This meant one thing. School children. There they stood, a pulsating, wobbling mess of kids. The relatively empty bus pulled to a halt and the smiling little darlings all tottered on board.
What can only be described as a swarm of young boys all came over and sat next to me. I was evidently on their turf (the back row) and they immediately claimed there spot, careful not to disturb me (The 6’1 bloke with his earphones in). I could hear what they were saying, the usual schoolboy natter.
Then all of a sudden, they started a rather chilling discussion. How they were going to ambush and “knock the sh*t out of” the “f*ggot” who had evidently just come out. Now these boys could only have been about 14-15. I don’t know if I’ve missed something, but plotting to try and hospitalise a young teen brave enough to come out seems really f**king over the top. Well I listened to this utterly disgusting conversation for about 20 minutes. Then most of the lads got off the bus.
Leaving the ringleader of this awful group at the back with me.
The boy I had heard not ten minutes earlier say “Try and break his arms”I don’t know what came over me.I calmly removed my earphones and looked over at him. He looked rather anxious. The following brief yet heated discussion ensued:

“Excuse me, I couldn’t help overhear you conversation, did you say you wanted to break ‘the f*ggots’ arms”


“Well, I’m gay. What you just said was disgusting, I’d imagine you’ve been raised by some sort of inbred, right wing dipsh*t parents, so it’s hardly your fault you’ve turned out the way you have, but say anything like that again you little sh*t, I’ll break your arms.”

“Erm… (He stands) we was only joking”

He then moved to the front of the bus, and then proceeded to get off.


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Call me a monster. But I’ve been that f*ggot who got sh*t ALL through school.


I popped my earphones back in and spent the rest of the journey with a fire of pride inside me, as I lip-synched away to Streisand all the way home.

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Have you seen this sort of casually over the top homophobia? If so, did you do anything?
Until next time darlings.

About the author: Lewis Fellows
Lewis is quite possibly the most clichéd gay among us. His wardrobe is mostly sarongs; he is obsessed with Judy Garland and enjoys 1 or maybe 5 cocktails a night. He bases his love life on that of Glenn Close’s in Fatal Attraction. Shockingly he is single. Despite this he is unspeakably fabulous. He is a gay activist and enjoys strolls along the beach...with a large net in which to catch men.

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