Your Comments: Is the term ‘Fag Hag’ offensive?

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The term “fag hag” dates back decades and originated from the US, but in 2017 is it now offensive to use?

Your Comments: Is the term 'Fag Hag' offensive? 1

The term “Fag Hag” is a slang phrase that refers to a woman who hangs around and socialises with mostly gay or bisexual men. These women could be characterised as out-going, camp and very accepting of the gay community – but not always.

Most notable examples of a “fag hag” could be Linda La Hughes in the British sitcom, Gimme Giveme Giveme. US Comedian Margaret Cho has talked in her standup show about being a “fag hag” (but now prefers the term “dick widow” and the legendary performer, Pam Ann has also been described as a “fag hag” by many gay publications.

Some people find the term offensive, whilst others embrace it… Some consider the phrase a term of endearment, but in 2017 does this phrase need to be used?

Over to you – use the comments below to let us know your thoughts. Do you find the term offensive? What other terms could be used instead?

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16 responses to “Your Comments: Is the term ‘Fag Hag’ offensive?”

28th July 2025

Yana

When young, Doing Fine Arts in Uni, living and working in bars in the gay village, I hung out with gay men. I was in gay-rich environment and outgoing. I really dislike the term; I get that it rhymes, so “Fag Hag was fun sounding. But unlike proud young gay men who didn’t mind about “fag” (sort of saw it as a cool, “in your face” re-appropriatied word at the time), “hag” on the other hand, and old negative term referring to “older, unkept, whiny women” can’t be re-appropriated in any bold way that I can think of. It’s an insult, period. Why would young, free spirited women be insulted for the company they kept? I had the same boyfriend throughout the years, wasn’t out to flirt, be hit on by straight friends with covert intentions, nor talk bad about anyone, and just felt more in my element with gay guys than with most women. I don’t see why the ugly slur.

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13th December 2017

Monty McKinnen

From what I recall, it was a way for bitchy gays to have a dig at another gay if they had a good friend who happened to be female!

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13th December 2017

Michael C Leeson

I had a dear friend who called herself by that tag, If the person uses it I am OK with. that, It is about people defining themselves not some Dudley Do Rights making stupid rules

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13th December 2017

Neil Power

Yes, neither term is flattering, sticking then together doesn’t make it any better

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13th December 2017

Mipsie

Not to me. I have always worn my haggery with pride. I am pretty ancient though so I may well be out of date.

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13th December 2017

Sean Jardine

Personally, I would assume the part that irks people is the “fag” bit. LGBT and its allies despise the word so I think it puts them off from the get-go.

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13th December 2017

Lavell Landers

Initially, I was offended by the word ‘Fag’ I preferred gay … however once I fully understood the term and not directed towards me, I was ok .. and my straight women friends were ok too …

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13th December 2017

Martin Liang

I prefer the term ‘fag bangle’ as they hang off your arm looking pretty, but don’t serve any function ?

Nah, not offensive

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1. 28th July 2025
  
  Yana
  
  But it IS offensive; what with the “serve no purpose”? “Hang on your arm? Since when being friends has to have any other purpose than liking each other’s company? When two straight girls or two men hang out, do you say that?
  
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13th December 2017

Jamie Freemantle

Oh yeah. Deeply offensive. I’m appalled. ???? fuck sakes

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13th December 2017

Ella Sayce

Nope doesn’t bother me, not part of the snowflake society. It’s a term that’s been used for decades! I fully embrace being a fag hag. X

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1. 28th July 2025
  
  Yana
  
  I get it. I wish it wouldn’t be”hag” thought, as if we were less than any other women
  
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13th December 2017

Patrick Ritchie

Not on the gay scene. It’s a woman who love gay company.

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1. 28th July 2025
  
  Yana
  
  The problem for me is more the “why” then the term: why does anyone care who hangs out together? Why should some kinds of friendships get called out? Straight people definitely mean to condescend by it and THAT gets to me
  
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13th December 2017

Justin John Ronald Walker

I knew girls back in the day who embraced the term. Now in the age of everyone being offended by something for the sake of being offended….. who knows

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1. 28th July 2025
  
  Yana
  
  Ho, I can deal with it… Just not sure why people always have to use derogative words for women, no matter what they do or look like (slut, cow, bitch etc or fag hag) Are we still in that “stand behind you man, look good and shut up” mode? Mean words, the western equivalent of a burqa
  
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