One of the major concerns for gay men who have had prostate surgery to remove the prostate gland is whether they can ever bottom again.
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The prostate is often referred to as the G Spot for men, or indeed, trans women. It has tonnes of nerve endings and when manipulated, it can cause huge amounts of pleasure for the recipient. Due to its placement in the body, the only way to access the prostate is either through fingering, anal sex or sounding.
What and where is the prostate?
The Prostate is a satsuma sized gland, located between the penis and bladder. Its function is to help in the production of semen. It produces the white fluid which is mixed with sperm created in the testicles.
What happens when the prostate is removed?
Removing the prostate is an operation which will be done under general anaesthetic, and it’s called a prostatectomy. This is where the entire or part of the prostate gland is removed. Usually due to cancer, but it might be removed for other reasons.
The operation does carry risks, including erectile dysfunction, urinary incontinence and loss of ejaculation, however, it doesn’t mean that sex for gay men has to stop.
Can you have gay sex after prostate surgery?
One reader recently asked whether it was safe for him to bottom again after surgery. We asked Doctor Rick Viney, a consultant urological surgeon at BMI The Priory and BMI Edgbaston hospitals in Birmingham, whether it was possible to bottom, or be the receptive partner in anal sex after a prostatectomy, he told us,
“With plenty of lube and going very gently at first there should be no problems.
“Now the prostate has gone the sensations may be diminished.
“Probably best done on an empty bladder as there may be a risk of some urinary incontinence unless you are ok with that – you might want to warn a potential partner of this possibility, beforehand.”
How long should you wait after prostate surgery to have gay sex?
Prostate charity, Prostate Cancer UK, suggests waiting at least 6 weeks after surgery or treatment before attempting anal sex and say that you should be a little more cautious.
In our podcast with Prostate Cancer survivor Martin Wells he told us, depending on your treatment, you could lose your ability to get a self-maintained erection, but said, that even though he couldn’t have sex in the same way as he had before his treatment, he learned a brand new way of being intimate with his partner. He now enjoys a more tantric approach to sex.
As always, it’s always best to ask your own physician or GP after surgery to see if there might be any other complications.