Tag: Reddit

All the latest breaking news on Reddit. Browse THEGAYUK’s complete collection of news, articles and commentary on Reddit.

  • These guys share the first signs they knew they were gay

    These guys share the first signs they knew they were gay

    It’s one of those questions that many of us get asked from curious people, both gay and straight alike.

    Inquisitive straight people might want to know how you came to the conclusion that you fancied people from the same sex.

    Other gay and bi guys might just want to compare their story with yours. For so many gay and bi people there are hardly any LGBT+ narratives on mainstream TV programming, particularly for kids or teens – so it can be much harder to come to terms with, or recognise your feelings and their validity when there’s nothing to compare it to.

    When asked, most guys say they knew quite early on in their lives… Do you remember when?

    two man sitting on pink flower field
    Photo by Cole Keister on Pexels.com

    A recent discussion on Reddit revealed some of the signs guys realised they were gay and we can’t 100 relate.

    When other guys talk about girls and you can’t relate. [VIA]

    Wanting to be friends with all the good looking boys [via]

    My first sign was when I played The Sims and made all my Sims gay [via]

    Masturbating to gay sex images / naked men [via]

    You make eye contact with other men and it’s like a lightning bolt shoots down your body from your brain to your cock. [via]

    I knew I was 100% gay when I made out with a guy for the first time. It felt right was sooooo much hotter than kissing a girl. [via]

    Searching “free gay porn” or “am I gay test” [via]

    For me was around 8-10 yo. My male friends would talk about the hot mamas and I couldn’t relate. I only had eyes to the moustache daddies. I wanted them to hold me and kiss me. [via]

    Realizing I wanted to spend all my time with one guy friend. Particularly loved wrestling with him. [via]

    I remember walking into a men’s locker room when I was a kid (around 9) and definitely something clicked at that moment. [via]

    I knew before I even knew there was such thing. I was probably 5 years old. It’s just a feeling you get. You just know. [via]

    Shopping for underwear and you get hard from the pictures on the packaging  [via]

    When you watch disney channel and the scenes where male actors take their shirts off interest you more than the storyline. [via]

    What were your first signs? Join the discussion on our very own social network.

  • What is the difference between the r/AskGayMen and /r/askgaybros/ Reddit groups?

    What is the difference between the r/AskGayMen and /r/askgaybros/ Reddit groups?

    Users have been taking an opportunity to discuss and joke about the difference between the r/AskGayMen and /r/askgaybros/ Reddit.

    Although both subreddits have very similar names, they are both very different in style, brand and well the number of people who are subscribed to them.

    /r/askgaybros/ is the bigger of the two forums and clocks in at around 256,000 members, with around 1,200 of them online at any point while r/AskGayMen boasts around 54,000 users with just over 100 online at any time.

    Both forums allow gay men to ask each other questions, like My hole is too tight or Would you ever be happy with a guy who has a small penis? but the way in which the forum’s users answer is very different.

    The joking started with one user, saying that on AskGayBros he could, … call you a fucking cunt and won’t be banned”

    Another added that, “The tolerance for excessive sarcasm and the amount of FILTH permitted” on AskGayBros was highly noted.

    Another added about the strictness of r/AskGayMen saying, “I got banned for being transphobic because as a crossdresser I don’t consider myself a female but a male still”

    One posted that /r/askgaybros/ was “unmoderated and full of trolls”

    One commented on the number of users, by adding “The posts there (askgaymen) seem just as stupid as here. But here you get slapped down in thirty seconds, there it might take twelve hours.”

    Perhaps most insightful was, “I’m assuming its the culture that it’s appealing to. AskGayBros is catering to a very niche culture of gay men while it sounds like AskGayMen is a more generic sub”

    [totalpoll id=”126640″]

    So there you have it, it’s about style as the questions seem to be generally the same, the way in which they answered might be slightly different.

  • Reddit just purged a lot of subreddits that criticised trans people

    Reddit just purged a lot of subreddits that criticised trans people

    Reddit has purged a huge amount of forums recently. Yesterday it banned numerous subreddits, many of which were gender critical, trans-exclusionary or part of an anti-transgender movement.

    Reddit is one of the largest forum websites in the world. It has hundreds of thousands of pages dedicated to thousands of topics, with millions of users.

    As part of an ongoing clean up of its website, Reddit banned numerous forums yesterday (10th July), which homed thousands of threads of conversations with regards to the validity of transgender identities and gender expression.

    Here’s the list of subreddits that were banned that Reddit said had broken its guidelines on “promoting hate”.

    r/ItsAFetish
    r/TrueLesbians
    r/GCDebatesQT
    r/ActualWomen
    r/TERFIsASlur
    r/GenderCriticalGuys
    r/GenderCritLesbians
    r/LGBDropTheT
    r/TrollGC
    r/ActuallyNotLesbians
    r/ThisNeverHappens
    r/BecauseTrans
    r/CisPrivilegeIsALie
    r/TransgenderKids
    r/GenderCriticalTheory
    r/GC_WoC
    r/GenderCynicalCritical
    r/ThereAreTwoGenders

    The ban included LGB specific reddits. Some of the LGB groups think that the T should be dropped from the LGBT+ acronym, very much like the Get the L out campaign which disrupted Pride In London in 2018 or the LGB Alliance on Twitter.

    • r/LGBDropTheT
    • r/TrueLesbians
    • r/GetTheLOut
    • r/UncensoredLGBT
    • r/gendercritlesbians were all part of the ban.

    Detrans is a forum that was initially banned for around an hour but was later reinstated. Its purpose is to give those people who detransition a forum to talk about their lives and journies.

    A week ago, Reddit made headlines after it deleted dozens of forums for hate speech.

    It is thought that Reddit has now deleted around 2000 of its forums.

  • Gay guys open up about some of the social issues that our community is facing

    Gay guys open up about some of the social issues that our community is facing

    As a community, we’ve faced some immense challenges. Some, across our world, are still facing untold tragedies and discrimination. Sometimes, however, the worst issues can come from within.

    So when Reddit user dprince1988 asked “What gay social problems do you see which aren’t talked about enough”, the AskGayMen community did some soul searching and came up with a list.

    Here are some of the issues it raised.

    Suicide Rate

    The LGBT+ community has one the highest suicide rates of any minority demographic.

    The Trevor Project details how suicide is one of the biggest killers of young people, and that Lesbian, Gay and Bi youth are three times more likely to contemplate suicide over their heterosexual counterparts.

    One commentator added, “I should submit a picture of my arm. So many cuts that I can’t even differentiate between normal and scar tissue. When meeting new people I have to wear long sleeves or else they freak out”.

    Sober spaces

    The lack of sober social spaces was also raised. However, there are services such as meetup.com which are helping to facilitate social situations that don’t centre around drinking.

    Loneliness and isolation

    At the moment, thanks to COVID-19 many people are facing isolation, but for many in the LGBT+ community, loneliness is a real issue outside of lockdown.

    Rural Isolation

    Outside of large cities and towns can be a real issue for LGBT+ people. Sometimes hook up apps and chat rooms are a vital lifeline for LGBT+ people who don’t have a local scene.

    Domestic Violence

    In a recent article for THEGAYUK.com legal expert, PAULA RHONE-ADRIEN shared, “…sadly, in such a small minority of just 1.1 million, at least 1 in 4 victims of domestic abuse are lesbian and nearly 1 in 2 victims are gay. The figure rises to nearly 80% if you identify as transexual”.

    Bottom shaming

    On bottom shaming one user-added, “Bottom shaming is internalized homophobia and societal view of women (the feminine) being less-than.”

    Lack of LGBT sex education

    As schools don’t tend to offer gay sex education there is a lot of misunderstanding surrounding STIs, the purpose of PrEP and consent.

    Ageism

    One user added, “Gay men are notorious for being disgusted and belittling older guys… even older guys do it to each-other… there’s an old cliche called the “gay death” which means once you turn 30 you’re ugly, old, and undesirable.”

    Ableism

    One user added, “Pretty tragic given how much more likely queer populations are to suffer psychological or physical ailments.”

    Drugs and Chemsex

    PNP and HnH orgies are becoming more and more commonplace and normalised on dating apps.

    Racism

    User HereForHope wrote, “This 100%. Racial dynamics are never talked about introspectively. Be that homophobia in communities of color to the fact that it’s apparently totally fine to have racist shit like “no blacks no rice” in your dating profile”

    Erasing the T

    User Atlask wrote, “I don’t know if it fits what you are looking for but that whole lgb movement who focuses mostly on erasing the trans…”

    Aesthetics

    Not conforming to a few very specific aesthetics” Another used also noted that eating disorders were rife in the community, saying, “

    I know so many gay men with eating disorders. They either are or have been out-and-our anorexic/bulimic, exercise bulimic, or take hard drugs to stop themselves from eating.

    “Others are on steroids to build up muscle.

    “And they’re all still unhappy, even the ones that have great bodies”.

    Friendships without sex

    Gay friends without sexual interest

    Bi-erasure

    Bi Erasure is a form of erasure directed towards the bisexual community It can take many forms including when society sidelines bisexual stories for gay or lesbian stories.

    Bi Erasure is also the ignoring or rewriting of LGBT+ history where bisexual people of note are effectively erased from the LGBT+ movement.

    Hookup culture

    Which could lead to invalidating other communities such as asexuals.

    Political Persuasions

    What happens when you’re not a democrat? One user suggested, “Gays assumed to be liberals/democrats. I know a lot of conservative/ republican gays and they always get the “but you’re gay!” attitude and called Uncle Toms. Really I think this is the biggest prejudice against gays now in the US. Gays are capable of free thought, not mindless hive mentality”

    Use the comments below to let us know your thoughts.

  • Yes, there are straight-identifying guys who want gay sex

    Yes, there are straight-identifying guys who want gay sex

    Is Sex different from Sexuality?

    (C) BIGSTOCK

    When one straight identifying guy on Reddit said that the thought of having sex with another man gave him “butterflies in his stomach” but didn’t he was “gay enough” to do it, people were there to guide him.

    Society problems?

    So what’s really holding guys back from experimenting with someone of the same sex? This poster wrote that he had an image of him as a “straight guy loving girls” but his feelings go the opposite way – despite not having a specific crush on a guy.

    He wrote,

    “…I got an image of myself as a straight guy loving girls and my feelings go in the opposite direction. I love masculinity and want to be a submissive guy. I hate being dominant while/and having sex with girls. But I never thought of going in bed with a specific guy, I never had a crush on a guy. This is “not gay enough”.

    So is he in love with the idea of being straight, but his heart is telling he’s gay, bi or curious? He wrote that he once tried a blowjob but felt deeply ashamed afterwards.

    Society’s push?

    This user suggested that society had its role in defining our sexuality and what is right and wrong, saying,

    “That’s just society that has shoved that idea in your head.
    “I felt guilty AF after I gave my first blowjob to the point where I ran away from my boyfriend (at the time)’s apartment and cried and threw up a bunch.

    “You can get over that and become comfortable with yourself. I sure did, and it didn’t take too long.”

    (C) BIGSTOCK

    Get stuck in

    Another poster was a little more upfront with his suggestion

    “suck some dick and see what happens”

    What’s “Gay Enough” mean?

    Another suggested,

    “If you’re a man and you want to have sex with another man, that makes you gay enough. You could be anyone from the most macho muscleman to the most femmy twink, and it doesn’t matter. All that matters is that you want to have sex with another man. That’s all it takes to be “gay enough”.

    “What’s wrong with you is that you’re holding yourself back from doing something you want to do. What you should do is have sex with another man.

    Another chipped in

    I’d recommend you just start experimenting. Take it slow, though, and make it clear that you’re new at this.

    Bisexual? Pansexual?

    This user pointed out that the OP might not be homosexual, but rather someone who is sexually attracted to all sexes and genders,

    “Your [sic] probably bi or pan and have inner-homophobia from religion, family, culture, whatever. Go out, or on an app, be honest on those apps and guys, have some condoms and lube handy and have sex with men. Good luck, have fun.

    Bottom line

    One of life’s struggles is the journey to becoming comfortable with yourself, however, that looks. Although some may see you as one thing, you, in the end, get to decide how to define yourself and set those boundaries.

    As long as you’re not hurting anyone and everything is consensual, crack on we say and enjoy yourself.

  • How open is your relationship?

    How open is your relationship?

    It’s not really unusual for gay and bi guys to open up their relationships…

    (C) BELAMI

    Sometimes what we do in our own community might seem strange to those outside it, like this straight-identified man who took to Reddit to ask whether it was normal for gay guys to have open relationships after his gay friend confided in him that he was getting bored of married life after just one year and decided to have a threesome.

    Reddit gays were on hand to let him know that it’s not that uncommon that gay couples, but not always, to open up their relationships – to differing degrees.

    So what are those degrees of an open relationship?

    The door has a keyhole

    makamuki0 / Pixabay

    Where a couple might talk or fantasise about having a threesome or a four-way with another couple. It’s on the table, the discussion is happening, maybe they even watch threesome porn together, but they’re not physically committed yet.

    The door is open a crack

    neshom / Pixabay

    There’s the casual threeway, where you both agree on the same person and are both involved. The couple sets up a date and go for it together.

    The screen door

    http://gty.im/6262-000289

    This is where a couple regularly has three ways, four ways or even attend orgies. They are okay with their partner having sex with other people and don’t necessarily have to be involved, as long as they are in the same room or building or event and have both agreed to the sex that is happening outside the relationship.

    The stable door

    455992 / Pixabay

    Both parties of a relationship are “allowed” to go play with other people, but it’s strictly “don’t ask don’t tell” and “not in our bed”.

    The door is wide open

    Pexels / Pixabay

    This is where the couple is open and honest about having sex with other people. There still may be rules attached to the sex, like condoms only, but generally, both parties in the relationship are happy about their partner having sex with someone else. The line would be drawn at creating an emotional attachment to someone outside the relationship.

    The Truple (the swing door??)

    I can’t take the door analogy any further but the truple is where a couple decides to open their relationship in all senses, sexually and emotionally and allow a third to become part of the family.

    So what do you think? Are you open to an open relationship?

  • Why are so many sites now banning adult content?

    Why are so many sites now banning adult content?

    With the announcement of Facebook’s new sexual content policy, we look at other internet platforms that have banned adult content.

    It was revealed last month that Facebook’s new sexual solicitation policy was hitting right at the heart of sexual interactions between people. Many critics believe that the move will hurt the LGBT+ community the most with the shocking revelation that people will no longer be able to discuss their preferred sexual roles, such as whether they are tops or bottoms.
    [expander_maker]

    But Facebook isn’t the first.

    Scruff, the gay dating app has had to ban various photos from being shown as profile pictures, including any pictures of guys in jockstraps, pictures with pubic hair on show or pictures which are sexual in nature.

    Grindr, also operates a similar photo policy.

    Instagram Users have long blasted the service for deleting their content. In 2018 gay pin-up magazine Meat‘s account was deleted twice, various celebs have hit out saying that the Facebook-owned entity had banned or blocked content.

    Tumblr Earlier in December blogging site, Tumblr announced that it was going to remove all adult content. It is believed that Apple forced the company to make the policy when it temporarily kicked the blogging site from its app store.

    Starbucks Also in December coffeeshop chain, Starbucks said that it had “identified a solution to prevent” porn from being viewed on its WIFI systems. It said would start blocking all sites from 2019.

    Craigslist shut down its personals listings, 2018 after US Congress passed a Sex Trafficking Bill. The personals had run since 1995. The Bill could subject websites found to be unknowingly hosting ads for sex trafficking to criminal and civil liabilities. As a result, Craigslist made the decision to remove all the personals from its site, saying, “Any tool or service can be misused. We can’t take such risk without jeopardizing all our other services, so we are regretfully taking craigslist personals offline”.

    Google Drive Sex workers have allegedly seen files deleted or removed from their Google Drives. Numerous adult performers and sex workers have found that content hosted on Google Drive was no longer accessible. The service does have a policy which bans the hosting of “sexually explicit or pornographic images or videos”.

    Patreon, a payment collection site for content creators starting banning adult performers because its payment partners, Stripe and PayPal were refusing service.

    Reddit has banned all sex-work groups and in 2007 LiveJournal made headlines after removing a picture of a mother breastfeeding saying it went against their content policy. 


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  • What are the most annoying things guys do during sex?

    “be on their phone looking for the next guy to hook up with”

    Gay Couple
    CREDIT ©-dnf-style-Depositphotos

    Some guys, honestly.

    Okay, we get it, no one guy is perfect, but some of us take the soggy biscuit too far as evidenced in a recent thread on Reddit when some gay guys shared what the most annoying things guys did to them during sex.

    There was everything from checking phones during the act to sexy talk that just wasn’t that sexy.

    Boy Pussy. Apparently calling your butt hole a “boy pussy” or bussy, is a definite no-no.  [via]

    via GIPHY

    God’s gift? Acting like a jerk is never sexy, this one user said, “Acting like they’re a gift to you, not reciprocating in foreplay, pounding like a rabbit and busting in 2 minutes asking you if it was good” is also annoying. [via]

    via GIPHY

    Size isn’t everything… but apparently, if you’re not blessed with a huge package but repeatedly ask the question, “do you like my big cock” along with other references to how big you are, is annoying. But interestingly it works the other way around too. [via]

    If you’re not well-endowed and the bottom partner goes on and on about how big you are, is truly annoying. [via]

    (C) BIGSTOCK Can you handle my size???

    Look who’s talking “Talking too much. Either about sex or more annoyingly about something else entirely. I’m happy to chat before/after sex but I don’t wanna hear about your sister’s new boyfriend or that your dog is at the vets… stop.” [via]

    Noisey sexer, also: “Two days ago I had a guy snorting while he was fucking me. Like, making pig noises. No thanks” [via]

    Devil Kissing “Kissing me with a pointed tongue, it feels hard and not comfortable to rub my tongue across it, relax your tongue muscles!” [via]

    Also on the block is sloppy kissers… “Some men are all drool and it’s just a mess. I love French kissing, but not with someone who drools like a Bassett hound” [via]

    via GIPHY

    Play that tune… When you spend all that time creating a sex playlist on Spotify… DAMN YOU [via]

     

    What are the most annoying things that have happened to you during sex?

     

  • Is it common for gay guys to have open relationships?

    Is it common for gay guys to have open relationships?

    Is it unusual for gay and bi guys who are in relationships to open it up?

    (C) BELAMI

    Sometimes what we do in our own community might seem strange to those outside it, like this straight-identified man who took to Reddit to ask whether it was normal for gay guys to have open relationships after his gay friend confided in him that he was getting bored of married life after just one year and decided to have a threesome.

    Reddit gays were on hand to let him know that it’s not that uncommon that gay couples, but not always, to open up their relationships – to differing degrees.

    So what are those degrees of an open relationship?

    The door has a keyhole

    Where a couple might talk or fantasise about having a threesome or a four-way with another couple. It’s on the table, the discussion is happening, maybe they even watch threesome porn together, but they’re not physically committed yet.

    The door is open a crack

    There’s the casual threeway, where you both agree on the same person, set up a date and go for it.

    The screen door

    This is where a couple regularly has three ways, four ways or even attend orgies. They are okay with their partner having sex with other people and don’t necessarily have to be involved, as long as they are in the same room or building or event.

    The stable door

    Both parties of a relationship are “allowed” to go play with other people, but it’s strictly “don’t ask don’t tell” and “not in our bed”.

    The door is wide open

    This is where the couple is open and honest about having sex with other people. There still may be rules attached to the sex, like condoms only,  but generally, both parties in the relationship are happy about their partner having sex with someone else. The line would be drawn at creating an emotional attachment to someone outside the relationship.

    The Truple (the swing door??)

    I can’t take the door analogy any further but the truple is where a couple decides to open their relationship in all senses, sexually and emotionally and allow a third to become part of the family.

    (C) BIGSTOCK

    So, is it common?

    So going back to the Reddit guy – what was he asking? Well, he asked the AskGayMen community whether it was more common for amongst gay, married men to have threesomes, get bored of their relationships or play away dates with other guys.

    Here’s what Reddit had to say on the matter of open relationships amongst gay men.

    Really quite common

    It’s actually way more common for gay men to have open relationships than it is for straight couples. [VIA]

    Gay people are just, in general, more open about it with each other, whereas straight people often just cheat on each other.

    I think the gay way of doing things is a lot better. Pure sexual monogamy clearly doesn’t work for many people, and it’s nice to be able to be honest about it with my partner instead of lying to each other and destroying each others’ trust. [VIA]

    Maybe not about being bored

    I can’t speak for every gay man but for me I know I would love a threesome or even more. I think more context is needed around the “bored” part. Is he bored in general or just bored in the bedroom? [VIA]

    Open doors

    Most of the gay couples I know have open / semi-open relationships. My husband and I have been together for 14 years and are mostly monogamous but allow each other to have rare, limited things on the side. [VIA]

    Not a red flag

    The threeway isn’t a red flag. Pretty common. The “bored” comment is a red flag. After more than ten years, I’m still more entertained by six hours of silence in a car next to my spouse than I am by five minutes alone. [VIA]

    Our own rules

    Don’t worry about it – gays have their own rules. [VIA]

    So what do you think? Are you open to an open relationship?

  • What if you’re straight, but feel a desire for gay sex?

    What if you’re straight, but feel a desire for gay sex?

    Is Sex different from Sexuality?

    (C) BIGSTOCK

    When one straight identifying guy on Reddit said that the thought of having sex with another man gave him “butterflies in his stomach” but didn’t he was “gay enough” to do it, people were there to guide him.

    Society problems?

    So what’s really holding guys back from experimenting with someone of the same sex? This poster wrote that he had an image of him as a “straight guy loving girls” but his feelings go the opposite way – despite not having a specific crush on a guy.

    He wrote,

    “…I got an image of myself as a straight guy loving girls and my feelings go in the opposite direction. I love masculinity and want to be a submissive guy. I hate being dominant while/and having sex with girls. But I never thought of going in bed with a specific guy, I never had a crush on a guy. This is “not gay enough”.

    So is he in love with the idea of being straight, but his heart is telling he’s gay, bi or curious? He wrote that he once tried a blowjob but felt deeply ashamed afterwards.

    Society’s push?

    This user suggested that society had its role in defining our sexuality and what is right and wrong, saying,

    “That’s just society that has shoved that idea in your head.
    “I felt guilty AF after I gave my first blowjob to the point where I ran away from my boyfriend (at the time)’s apartment and cried and threw up a bunch.

    “You can get over that and become comfortable with yourself. I sure did, and it didn’t take too long.”

    (C) BIGSTOCK

    Get stuck in

    Another poster was a little more upfront with his suggestion

    “suck some dick and see what happens”

    What’s “Gay Enough” mean?

    Another suggested,

    “If you’re a man and you want to have sex with another man, that makes you gay enough. You could be anyone from the most macho muscleman to the most femmy twink, and it doesn’t matter. All that matters is that you want to have sex with another man. That’s all it takes to be “gay enough”.

    “What’s wrong with you is that you’re holding yourself back from doing something you want to do. What you should do is have sex with another man.

    Another chipped in

    I’d recommend you just start experimenting. Take it slow, though, and make it clear that you’re new at this.

     

    Bisexual? Pansexual?

    This user pointed out that the OP might not be homosexual, but rather someone who is sexually attracted to all sexes and genders,

    “Your [sic] probably bi or pan and have inner-homophobia from religion, family, culture, whatever. Go out, or on an app, be honest on those apps and guys, have some condoms and lube handy and have sex with men. Good luck, have fun.