Category: Trending

10 LGBT+ celebs who are totally sober and living their best life

Not all celebrities need a drink to have a good time! In fact, many of them have sworn off the booze for good and are living their best lifes.

Frankie Grande

CREDIT: Channel 5/ Youtube

US reality TV star Frankie Grande recently celebrated a year and a half sober. He took to Instagram to celebrate the amazing milestone and released a colourful artwork featuring a picture of him smiling and the words, “sexy, sassy and strong” added.

He also took a moment to reach out to anyone who is struggling with depression or unmanageable or overwhelming feelings to offer the words of encouragment, that you don’t “have to drink and use over them…”

Bradley Traynor

If you’re outside the US, you might be more familar with Brad’s former alter ego, drag queen Wanda Wisdom, the first ever drag queen to host her own podcast. She made a big point at the start of every show to say that she was a “single, sober drag queen”. Nowadays, Brad is still sober, but works as a presenter on the radio, MyTalk 1071.

RuPaul

Speaking to THEGAYUK in 2014, RuPaul told us, “Well you know I’ve been sober for 14 years. I feel incredible. If you wanna lead a life on this planet there’s an evolution a story line, somethings get left behind. It’s like a rocket and a fuselage.

“To launch a rocket into space you need to use the fuselage but at some point you leave Earth’s atmosphere and you don’t need that fuselage anymore and you realise its important to break it off, if you want to move further. My point is you have to be present enough to understand when it’s time to give certain things up, but you also need tools to know how to deal with being present, because sometimes being present is really f**ked up.

“Sometimes you get really bored, sometimes you have a lot of pain, a lot of loneliness, but you need the tools to deal with that otherwise you’re gonna be in a lot of pain”

Matthew Mitcham

CREDIT: Matthew Mitcham/Instagram

The Aussie Olympian, Matthew Mitcham is sober and recently celebrated another year sober. He took to Instagram to say, “I also reached another recovery milestone, and I’ve never felt cleaner or serener”.

Zachary Quinto

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The actor Zachary Quinto has just celebrated 3 years of soberty on Instagram, writing, “III years sober today. i guess i wore the right jumper for the occasion. when i think about how far i’ve come and how much i’ve grown and how much more i love myself,” he wrote in the caption. “I’m really blown away. very far from perfect – but perfectly flawed. and working every day to honor and realize my full potential.

“Three years ago i had lost a connection to gratitude almost entirely. today i am brimming with it. for this touchstone. for life’s abundance. for true friends. for support. for the sweet freedom of this journey. may it continue with compassion – curiosity – honesty and above all… LOVE.”

Elton John

© S Buckley Depositphotos

Elton John‘s fight against drugs, drink and eating disorders started in 1990. The music legend was propelled to get sober 28 years ago in 1990 in the wake of seeing how the AIDS scourge inflicted itself on the community. The Fix quotes, “Within six months I became sober, and clean, and have been for the last (28) years.”

Tyler The Creator

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Tyler may rap about liquor and meds, but apparently he’s totally sober, he said, “Not to drugs, I never spark it.”

Jake Hook

Songwriter and editor of this very magazine Jake Hook has spoken about the benefits of being sober, including the monetary and well-being benefits. He became sober in the summer of 2014. Speaking about the night before coming sober he wrote, “…one night, when I was alone and I started to drink by myself and after the first half a bottle of Malibu, or whatever it was I was drinking, a thought popped into my head. ‘What am I doing and why am I doing this?’ I wasn’t happy and jolly, I wasn’t being the life and soul of any parties and I certainly wasn’t looking, feeling or acting the sexy beast that I know myself to be! Looking into the mirror, I saw how miserable I had actually become”.

Kelly Osborne

©-s_bukley-Depositphotos

Kelly Osbourne shared a passionate post on Instagram in August 2018 celebrating one year of restraint. She said, “This past year has been one of the hardest years of my life and I feel it’s time share that with you guys,

“To cut a long story short things got really dark … The only way I knew how to function was to self medicate and go from project to project so I never had to focus on what was really going on with me.”

Sia

Embed from Getty Images

In September 2018, the artist tweeted about being eight years without drink.

“Eight years sober today,” she wrote on September 11, 2018. “I love you, keep going. You can do it.”

During an appearance on The Late Late Show, the singer talked about her struggles. She said, “I was a singer already for like 10 or 11 years to mediocre success, and I was an alcoholic and a drug addict, and I sobered up and decided I didn’t want to be an artist any more,

“I was starting to get a little bit famous and it was destabilizing in some ways…so I thought, ‘What doesn’t exist in pop music at the moment?’ and it was mystery.”

9th June 2019
Over 80 per cent of LGBT+ people don’t feel they can hold their partner’s hand in public

It appears that the vast majority of LGBT+ people in the UK feel uncomfortable holding the hands of their same-sex partner in the UK.

CREDIT: © oneinchpunch Depositphotos

THEGAYUK.com conducted a flash poll on social media, asking 200 people from the LGBT+ community whether they felt they could hold the hand of their same-sex partner, where opposite-sex partners could and would hold theirs – and the results are staggering.

Over 80 per cent (85%) of those who answered the poll said that they didn’t feel they could hold their same-sex partner’s hand in public in the UK. Only 15 per cent of those who answered said they would feel comfortable.

Speaking about the findings, editor of THEGAYUK.com, Jake Hook said, “What this poll shows is very troubling. Despite LGBT+ people having almost equal legal rights in the UK, our community still don’t feel that we’re societally equal.

“Gay and bisexual men and women should be able to walk down any street in the UK, where their straight counterparts hold hands and feel that they can do the same without ridicule, attack or comment”.

Percieved safety is getting worse

CREDIT: Depositphotos.com

Seemingly the LGBT+ community is getting more wary of showing public displays of affection on the streets of the UK. In 2018 only 41% said they wouldn’t feel they could hold hands with their partner and in 2016 that figure was 23%.

THEGAYUK.com asked a similar question in October 2018 we asked whether LGBT+ people were comfortable holding hands, 41 per cent said no – 22 per cent were unsure and 37 per cent said they were comfortable holding hands.

In December 2016 – where we asked 166 people if they felt they could hold their partner’s hand in a supermarket. Only 30 percent of people said that felt they wouldn’t be able to, where as 23 per cent admited that they already did hold their partner’s hand in public.

4th June 2019
10 ways to losing body fat fast

Not only is burning off some fat going to help your self-esteem, but it will also help you live longer. Ignoring all the talk of heart disease, diabetes, and cancer, lowering your body fat will help you move and sit more comfortably, protect your joints and your back, and can help you feel really good about looking after yourself.

CREDIT: ©-livrakv-Depositphotos

That being said, it ain’t easy. If it were we would all be flashing our 6-packs morning, noon, and night.

1. Stop drinking so many calories

This isn’t exclusive to alcohol, but we as a nation drink way too many of our calories. Sugary drinks, booze, fancy coffees, energy or ”sports” drinks, even plain old orange juice, they’re all packed with calories and sugar. And since you’re drinking them, those calories don’t seem to fill you up the way food does.

It may seem boring but stick to water as much as possible.

2. Drink more water

Just to hammer this point home, drink a butt load of water to keep your body hydrated and feeling full at all times. Drink a glass of water with every meal and keep your metabolism online.

Plus it’s free!

3. Eat more

CREDIT: mythja-bigstock

Oh yeah, we’re telling you to eat more in order to reduce your body fat. By that, we mean more greens… sorry. Add a fistful or two of veg to every meal. Spinach with your omelette, broccoli with your chicken, a load of leaves on your burger; all of these are nutrient dense but low on calories and will help you feel fuller without being fattening.
4. Sleep!

Your muscles grow and recover while you’re sleeping, so if you’re smashing out sessions at the gym but burning the midnight oil you’re not going to see the benefits from your hard work. Plus you’ll be knackered, won’t be able to train as hard the next day, and are far more likely to eat more in order to stay awake.

5. Lift some weights

CREDIT: Dean-Drobot-bigstock

A six-pack cannot be achieved by cardio and crunches alone, so you’ll need to pick up some weights in order to rev up your metabolism a bit. Adding 1.5kg worth of muscle to your body can potentially burn an extra 1,050 calories a week, according to a study by the University of Michigan.

If you’re not bothered about building muscle and getting bigger, then train for strength with big, compound movements such as the power clean and squat. That way you turn every workout into a fat-burner.

6. Low-intensity cardio

CREDIT: Flynt-bigstock

Now I know what you’re thinking, “But you’re always going on about high-intensity training!” And while HIIT is often our go-to form of cardio, don’t discount the benefits of some steady state cardio.

Low-intensity steady state (LISS) cardio lowers the stress hormone cortisol, which has been associated with increased fat storage. It also burns calories (obviously) and can even be used as active recovery the day after an intense training session.

7. Fill up on fibre

Fibre is great at keeping you regular and is an important part of every bottom’s day-to-day life. But wait, there’s more. Research has shown that fibre can boost your fat-burning by as much as 30%. Add whole grains and fruits to your diet and aim to eat about 25g of fibre per day.

8. Spice up your life!

SLAM IT TO THE LEFT! … sorry, got carried away. Developing a taste for spicy food can give your metabolism a serious boost. So add some chillis to your next stir-fry and some paprika to your next batch of homemade burgers to torch some extra body fat while you eat.

9. Get plenty of D, vitamin D

Vitamin D is essential in order to preserve muscle tissue and is best obtained from your food, so we recommend getting your D orally. Giggle. Which is good because depending on sunshine would be frustrating as hell in the UK.

You can get 90% of your recommended daily intake from a 100g piece of salmon. So eat plenty of fish, eggs, milk and cereals to get your intake up.

10. Fat-burning workout once a week

Add a fat-burning workout to your weekly routine, something that will have you sweating, burning calories, and building muscle.

We’ve got a load of ’em, so sign up to our weekly workouts to get them sent straight to your inbox once a week.

30th May 2019
9 reasons why you should book a HIV test today

Knowing your HIV status is one of the most powerful things you can do for your health, so why not book an appointment to get tested today.

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1) Testing is free on the NHS

It’s free. If you’re in the UK you can book yourself in for a free HIV test. There are some walk-in clinics and organisations around the UK, but you can always book an appointment at a sexual health clinic near you.

2) It’s really really quick

From a drop of blood, the HIV test is super quick and takes just minutes. No waiting around for results, no needles, just a quick finger prick.

3) Knowledge is power

Someone who knows their HIV status for sure, whether they are negative or positive is safer to hook up with than someone who isn’t sure. Thanks to treatments which can bring someone’s viral load down to undetectable, makes the possibility of passing on HIV almost impossible. You should find out more about the campaign UEqualsU – which stands for undetectable equals untransmittable.

4) Get the treatment and support you need.

Once you know your status, particularly if it comes back positive you can begin to take action to keep you and your sexual partner(s) healthy. In the UK HIV medication and care is free.

CREDIT: Bigstock

5) Can’t pass HIV on

Taking HIV medication as prescribed means you can’t pass the virus on. The sooner you’re on the right, prescribed medication, the quicker you can get back to having the sex you want.

6) Keep you and your partner healthy.

Not knowing whether you have HIV or not means you can’t take steps to prevent passing on HIV to your partner(s).

7) Make it part of your sex life.

It’s recommended that you test regularly, particularly if you have multiple partners. So if you enjoy a regular sex life, make testing part of it.

8) It’s confidential

Testing for HIV is confidential. Your details won’t be passed on to anyone else.

9) You can do it from home

Yes, you can even get HIV tests direct to your door. The Terrence Higgins Trust offers free or low-cost HIV kits for home testing.

16th May 2019
DILEMMA | I’m scared that I’ll fart during anal sex

Dear TGUK,
I’m worried about farts during sex. I’m still a butt virgin, meaning I’ve not had anal sex yet as a bottom, but I’m worried that I might fart, which seems like it’s the most embarrassing thing that can happen during sex. What can I do to stop the farts.”
Simon
Notts.

Dear Simon,

You can’t stop the farts. But the likelihood of you doing one during the middle of anal sex isn’t that high, particularly if you stay away from these foods before having anal sex.

However, with the dick acting as a plunger into your ass, air will creep in and at some point that air has to come out. It’s just all part of the butt sex thing and the best thing to do is either laugh it off or just ignore it. Your top will most likely be totally engrossed with what he’s doing that he won’t notice and if he’s totally grossed out by your bottom rasp then maybe he needs to reconsider his sex role.

So stop worrying, as worrying will only cause you to tense up and being tense (down there) during sex is not a good thing. Don’t compare your sex life to that of what you see in porn, where tops are able to stick their dicks in straight away, they always have hard cocks and bottoms can take a pounding for what seems like hours on end and never fart. Sex in real life can be messy, can take lots of time and can be very funny. So relax. If you need tips on how to be clean during anal sex try out these suggestions if you want to know about what type of lube for anal is the best click here.

Just make sure you’re ready, use lots of lube and have fun.

Have you got a dilemma? Click here to send us a message.

14th May 2019
5 things you definitely need to do if you’re planning on a One Night Stand

For those of you who read my last article, you’ll remember that I said the main thing to remember whilst dating, is, to tell the truth, and be totally honest. Well, this piece boasts the complete opposite!

5 things you definitely need to do if you’re planning on a One Night Stand

When it comes to the traditional one night stand, or having sex with strangers, none of the honesty or rules of chivalry applies! In fact, you probably stand a better chance of pulling, if you employ full use of your carefree attitude. So guys, when you’re getting ready to go out tonight, make sure the last thing you put on, is your shagger swagger!

The beauty of having sex with a stranger is that it can be completely anonymous, and string free. The best part of a relationship, with the added bonus, that it only lasts one night! For those of you that have never slept with a stranger, are you starting to see the appeal yet?

My advice is to completely invent yourself a pseudonym, build up a whole alter ego, do whatever you like, be whoever you like and do it with whoever you want to do it with! You have to make sure though, that when you’re building up your night-time image, that you have to remember your story! Stick to the lies, you’ll thank me in the morning – never let your secret slip!

Experiment, it’s always fun to try new things! If one nighters aren’t your thing, then honey, pick up your Bible and tighten up your chastity belt, this clearly isn’t the year for you! If you’re thinking of trying it out, then do it – don’t think too much, you might change your mind! If you’re a more seasoned bed hopper though, why not embrace your adventurous side – my motto – if it’s comfortable and slow – you just aren’t doing it right!

In my experience, it’s for the best that you Never Swap Numbers, once you do, you run the risk of (a) if you rocked his world, gaining a stalker (b) having to admit you lied and (c) making awkward conversation because you’re too nice to tell him to leave you alone! If you don’t feel comfortable saying no to giving him your number, and can’t make one up off the top of your head – take his, tell him your phone is dead and discard on the way home!

When sleeping with strangers, it’s a good idea to make sure you watch your level of Intoxication, you don’t want to be so drunk you end up waking up face down in a ditch, with your trousers around your ankles, and all of your possessions gone with the stars! I am going to say though you don’t want to be sober either; you just won’t enjoy yourself if you are! Get yourself to that merry state, and voilà, you’re in for a night filled with filth.

And, as ever, we at THEGAYUK always promote Safer Sex, you can never be too careful! We know that in the heat of the moment, taking the time to roll down your condom is possibly the last thing on your list, but you have to be responsible!

I hope you enjoy your night, have fun, go wild but most importantly, think P.E.N.I.S. – Pseudonym, Experiment, Never Swap Numbers, Intoxication and Safer Sex.

As I always say, don’t be a fool – wrap that tool! If you need any advice, or for more information on sexual health visit: http://www.gmfa.org.uk/sex/ better to be safe, than sorry!

Want to meet some guys? Join our very own free social/dating network.

This article was first published in July 2012

9th May 2019
12 definite signs you might be Patsy Stone

She’s an icon amongst icons. A gay man’s favourite: Man loving, alcohol swigging, chain smoking, power dressing magazine icon. Patsy Stone we love you.

On Smoking

“Smoking is good for you…”

On Her Drinking

“The last mosquito that bit me had to book into the Betty Ford Clinic.”

On Sex

“My ring needs resealing, I know the gutters sagging a bit but how about a quick plunge up the waste pipe?”

On Work Ethics

“It’s 7– 7:30? In the…? Why, that means nothing to me!”

On Driving

“Keep driving, Eddy. You haven’t hit anything yet.”

On Fashion

“Are you mad? I’ve got nothing to wear on public transport?”

On Saffy

“You may dress like a Christian, but the similarity ends there. I think you do it on purpose. How long does it take you to get the crease so crisp down the front of your jeans, you torturer?”

More on Safi

“Oh you little BITCH TROLL FROM HELL.”

On People

“She’s emaciated, like her brain!”

As A Fashion Editor

“The only label she wears is “Drip Dry”.

On Brand

“One wiff of a cocoa bean and our customers would fly like vampires before garlic. Jeremy’s must remain a sterile oasis, free from street eaters and coffee carriers. Aseptic and razor-sharp as our customer’s hipbones. These women shop for lunch! Labels are their only sustenance! Their skeleton legs in Manolos have worn trenches down the pavement of Sloan Street. Their arm sinews have just enough muscles left in their arm to lift up a credit card.”<

On Motherhood

“Nothing, and you shouldn’t have to. I mean, look at you. You’ve been a fantastic mother. You’ve let them ruin your figure. Your stomach’s stretched beyond recognition, you’ve got tits down to your knees, and what for, for God’s sake? For a potholer who’s worn nothing but a purple nylon tracksuit and a Gazza t-shirt for the past two years. Cut the cord, darling.”

So are you Patsy? Congratulate yourself sweetie.

1st May 2019
There are just somethings you’re not suppose to talk about, sex is one of them – apparently

Brits would prefer to talk about their weight, mental health and family dramas than money.

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A survey of 2,000 adults revealed what is and isn’t acceptable to talk about with their emotions, religion and infertility all considered more socially acceptable to discuss than finances and debt.

Just 18 per cent consider the delicate topics of miscarriage and infertility to be off-limits compared to one quarter who say the same about personal finances.

Similarly, one in five don’t think it’s suitable to disclose their salary in social settings and more than half believe the subject of money should be completely off limits at work.

Other unacceptable conversations include drugs, sex and parenting techniques, with Brits going as far as to say discussing these ‘taboo’ subjects leaves them feeling ‘anxious’ and ‘nervous’.

The research was commissioned by Lowell, which helps consumers and businesses manage credit better, and wants to highlight how talking helps.

Clinical and counselling psychologist Tamara Licht Musso said: “Not talking can seem the best short term strategy, but is a negative coping mechanism and at some point it cracks.

“Avoidance is also a classic way of coping to keep anxiety at bay, but we cannot avoid our thoughts, which is where all emotions emerge, therefore pushing back such thoughts may result in them appearing through symptoms such as difficulties with sleep.

“Taking the ‘easy’ route might seem to be the answer because the rational path – talking – puts us in a much more vulnerable position.

“In the short term this may be true, but it puts us in a healthier place in the long term.

“The fear of being judged is based on distorted thinking patterns such as jumping to conclusions and mind reading.

“For example, some people will think that by sharing their salary others may misjudge their ability.”

The research also found more than half fear being judged if they were to open up about personal issues, while another one in two avoid certain topics because they find it ‘embarrassing’.

“one third fearing it could lead to arguments”

Others keep quiet as they don’t want to share their personal lives, believe it’s rude to talk about certain things or worry about the consequences of opening up, with more than one third fearing it could lead to arguments.

One in five are afraid talking about things will break up their relationship and one in 10 even fear losing their job.

However, due to avoiding discussions about an issue, 31 per cent have experienced loss of sleep and one sixth have even suffered from mental health issues.

It also emerged that 62 per cent consider opening up to be a ‘big step’ and feel it’s sometimes ‘easier to keep it to yourself’.

And almost half of those polled via OnePoll wish society made it easier and more acceptable to talk about things.

Lowell’s Managing Director John Pears added: “Breaking down these taboos and having open, honest conversations helps understanding, and can pave the way to finding answers to problems.

“Talking to someone is the first step, but it can obviously be difficult and many are worried, aren’t sure who can help or don’t feel they can trust someone.

“We know that when it comes to money or debt, people can be particularly sensitive or embarrassed about it, and customers tell us that not talking has caused them to worry more and for things to get worse, which really doesn’t have to be the case – there is help out there.”

Top 20 most socially unacceptable things to talk about according to Brits:
1. Sex life
2. Bodily functions
3. Personal finances
4. Salary
5. Debt
6. Miscarriage
7. Infertility
8. Addictions
9. Religion
10. Asking someone’s age
11. Race
12. Weight
13. Other people’s lives
14. Mental health
15. Drugs
16. Family dramas
17. Sexism
18. Parenting techniques
19. Politics
20. Emotional feelings

30th April 2019
The Rules of Rough Sex

This week, columnist Scott Sammons gives us a rundown of rule for rough sex.

This article is NSFW, please click here to confirm you are over 18.

21st April 2019
Are you guilty of glistening?

Glistening is short for “gay listening” which Alan Downs PhD discusses in his book, The Velvet Rage and apparently we’re all a little guilty of it from time to time.

Glistening is when you’re sort of (but not really) listening to the guy right in front of you, but scoping out other men in the room – and being relatively obvious about it, so that the man you’re actually conversing with notices that you’re not 100 per cent focusing on him.

Missing Out On Opportunities

Recounting a story from one of his patients, Alan says that one guy he knows missed out on a huge job opportunity from a guy who was trying to get his attention at a dinner party. The would-be employee barely even noticed the potential employer right in front of him, because another, more fanciable man entered the room, stealing his attention.

The job opening would have been of huge benefit, but because of his behaviour, the employer was ultimately put off, because the would-be employee wasn’t present in the moment and actually hugely disrespecting him.

Give People The Respect They Deserve

So the moral of the story is to make sure you’re giving people the respect they deserve and listen, fully listen to those who are speaking to you.

17th April 2019
Turns out you may have been douching wrong all this time

Do you douche?

If you do how to do you do it? With a bulb douche or with a shower hose? Well, one doctor, Doctor Goldstein from Bespoke Surgical New York, USA, speaking on the Talk About Gay Sex Podcast said that if you use a shower hose that you need to take care and keep a steady flow, much like a colonic.

Dr Goldstein did warn that using a shower hose wasn’t the safest way of making sure your booty was anal sex ready, as water pressure and temperature can cause damage, but he also warned that excessive douching will get rid of the good, essential bacteria in your gut.

However, if you are going to use a shower douche he advises that shooting water up your rectum, holding it inside you and then letting the water go, isn’t the optimum way of getting clean or keeping your ass safe.

CREDIT: ©-dnf-style-Depositphotos

Instead, the Doc suggested a more steady approach revealing, “the key is kinda like a colonic, where water is going in and water is going out, so that you’re never filling up” was the best way to make sure you get everything right, adding “it’s not the way to roll”.

He also suggested that when it comes to douching that “less is more”.

So there you have it. Less is more and think colonic!

3rd April 2019