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  • Popular gay bar says it might have to “call it a day” due to England’s Tier system

    Popular gay bar says it might have to “call it a day” due to England’s Tier system

    With England’s latest lockdown ending in just over a week many bars, and in particular many LGBT+ venues are really feeling the pinch. One gay bar in Birmingham has said it might be time to”call it a day”.

    One of the issues facing many bars, but in particular gay bars, is that many aren’t equipped to serve food – which is one of the requirements for pubs to be able to open in at least two Tiers of the Government’s system. Bars which solely sell drink are unable to open in Tier 2 and Tier 3. Only bars which sell “substantial” food can open in Tier 2 and can only operate as takeouts in Tier 3.

    With most of the country expected to be entered into Tier 2 or 3 when Boris Johnson announces the Tier system in the next few days, the Equator bar in Birmingham announced that it might have to close forever, adding “Equator bar is not a restaurant so will not be allowed to open in Tier 2” and added, “Maybe time to call it a day”.

    If the Equator Bar, which has been operating for over 15 years, does close it will be the second bar in Birmingham to have fallen victim to the economic woes faced by the hospitality industry due to the Government’s handling of the current Coronavirus pandemic.

    Numerous fans took to the bar’s Facebook page to share their sorrow that the bar may be forced to close.

    Speaking to THEGAYUK.com the owner said, “It’s devastating that customers cannot come to their local community bar. We haven’t had a single case that I know of…

    “I’ve been here 18 years and not sure how much longer we can stay closed with no help from the gov”.

    Give Equator Bar a follow on their Facebook page to keep up to date with them.

    Not the first victim of the devastating Tier system

    The Tier system used in England has brought economic hardship for many businesses, but in particular for social-based businesses like pubs and bars.

    Nightclubs have not been able to open since March.

    In Tier 2, which most of England is expected to enter come the 2nd of December does not allow for household mixing, meaning that friends and family from different households are unable to meet in public, including in pubs and restaurants. In Tier 3 all bars and restaurants must close and are only permitted to operate as a food takeaway.

    Bars and pubs across England have spent huge sums of money on becoming “COVID-secure” and have restricted their capacities in order to aid with social distancing, adding extra pressure on their bottom lines.

    Writing about the latest announcement from Boris Johnson, the Royal Vauxhall Tavern in London tweeted, “We are all stuck in the worst possible purgatory with the worst possible ruler”

    2020 has seen numerous gay bar closures. Earlier in the year, Birmingham’s Eden Bar was forced to close due to devastating restraints placed on the pub industry. Also in the West Midlands, Midland Zone magazine also fell victim to the economic downturn.

    gay Bar Broadway to close forever due to Covid

    Nottingham’s only LGBT+ club, Propaganda closed in May and in Brighton, two venues have already shuttered. This month The Broadway closed and earlier in the year Legends fell into administration, before being reopened by new owners.

    Birmingham has one of the largest gay scenes outside of London and is home to a number of LGBT+ venues.

  • What is the difference between the r/AskGayMen and /r/askgaybros/ Reddit groups?

    What is the difference between the r/AskGayMen and /r/askgaybros/ Reddit groups?

    Users have been taking an opportunity to discuss and joke about the difference between the r/AskGayMen and /r/askgaybros/ Reddit.

    Although both subreddits have very similar names, they are both very different in style, brand and well the number of people who are subscribed to them.

    /r/askgaybros/ is the bigger of the two forums and clocks in at around 256,000 members, with around 1,200 of them online at any point while r/AskGayMen boasts around 54,000 users with just over 100 online at any time.

    Both forums allow gay men to ask each other questions, like My hole is too tight or Would you ever be happy with a guy who has a small penis? but the way in which the forum’s users answer is very different.

    The joking started with one user, saying that on AskGayBros he could, … call you a fucking cunt and won’t be banned”

    Another added that, “The tolerance for excessive sarcasm and the amount of FILTH permitted” on AskGayBros was highly noted.

    Another added about the strictness of r/AskGayMen saying, “I got banned for being transphobic because as a crossdresser I don’t consider myself a female but a male still”

    One posted that /r/askgaybros/ was “unmoderated and full of trolls”

    One commented on the number of users, by adding “The posts there (askgaymen) seem just as stupid as here. But here you get slapped down in thirty seconds, there it might take twelve hours.”

    Perhaps most insightful was, “I’m assuming its the culture that it’s appealing to. AskGayBros is catering to a very niche culture of gay men while it sounds like AskGayMen is a more generic sub”

    [totalpoll id=”126640″]

    So there you have it, it’s about style as the questions seem to be generally the same, the way in which they answered might be slightly different.

  • This Zachary Quinto topless pic has cured Monday’s thirst

    This Zachary Quinto topless pic has cured Monday’s thirst

    We love a shirtless picture, and Zachary Quinto topless is what we needed to see today.

    Okay, so Boys In The Band star, Zachary Quinto has managed to get our week all set up and our pulse racing in one easy moment, by posting an incredible body shot, which he simply named, “Saturday sits”.

    TBF it actually doesn’t matter what day it is.

    Sitting, sopping wet (did he just get out of the pool?) the star looked effortlessly sexy, showing off some incredibly defined abs. Which of course got his 979,000 fans on Instagram very hot under the collar, with the picture racking up over 74,000 likes in 24 hours and over 1000 very thirsty comments.

    You can watch Boys In The Band, starring Zachary on Netflix now.

  • Gay Dating | What does “sliding into DMs” mean?

    Gay Dating | What does “sliding into DMs” mean?

    What does it mean if someone is “sliding into DMs” and is it a welcome thing?

    Maybe it’s a phrase you’ve seen creeping up from time to time and you’re wondering what it means, well simply put, it’s when a guy (or gal – or neither, gender doesn’t have to be binary) sends you a direct message that’s the DM part. It’s usually via social media rather than a WhatsApp or Text message, or even on a dating app.

    Sending messages via Twitter, Instagram, Snap or via dating app messaging can let people you don’t know personally send private messages to you, without having to know your digits.

    The key to sliding into anyone’s DMs is that it’s unexpected and hopefully wanted. Sliding into someone’s DMs when its not wanted is super stalkery and should be avoided at all costs.

    Or sliding into someone’s DMS after you’ve ghosted them along time ago is really uncool, in fact it makes you a Zombie.

    So why is “sliding into DMs” a thing?

    Well, for one thing, it’s an opportunity for someone to get in contact with a person they like the look of without having to meet them in person or have their private info.

    sliding into DMs shows a level of confidence
    rawpixel / Pixabay

    The “sliding” part also denotes a certain kind of confidence, which for many people is a real turn on.

    But you only really have a limited time for your DM to make its mark, so if you’re planning on sliding into DMs don’t waste it by simply writing “hey” be creative.

    Sexpert Jack Devon told us, “Sliding into anyone’s DMs is always a risk… it may be unwanted but it also may be entirely welcomed. The trick is to read the situation, which again can be super tricky in an online scenario. However, if your DM is answered, plot out the journey of the conversation, if the goal is to eventually meet with the person, make sure you’re both compatible up front by asking lots of thoughtful questions – without appearing to be a stalker. If you do meet up make sure you check out these safety tips“.

    Check out more gay dating terms.

  • Lost LGBT Scene | Holland Park Sauna

    Lost LGBT Scene | Holland Park Sauna

    We’re creating an online memory board for some of London’s lost venues. Since the turn of the century, London’s gay scene has lost over 100 venues.

    We’d love for you to help us grow this historical archive of London’s lost gay scene. If you’ve got photos or memories of any of the venues you’d like to share please use the comment section below and we’ll add them right here.

    Holland Park Sauna

    A memory from a user:

    A sauna right in the middle of the shopping centre (not the Westfield creation), in you went, across to the changing rooms and off you went but this was the time before sex was possible in open as some horrid little man would patrol but, you always found action.

    The showers, the jacuzzi, the saunas and the “rest” area upstairs that were a load of single beds laid out like a dormitory. 

    I remember I had my nipple pierced which was unusual at the time, this proved very popular. On leaving you would rejoin the shoppers or pop into Safeway or if you were still up for more, Silks club was next door. Very handy. 

    Opened: Can you help? Click here to update this listing

    Closed: Can you help? Click here to update this listing

    BACK TO MAIN LIST

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  • 5 things you need to know about fuckboys

    5 things you need to know about fuckboys

    Okay. Show of hands. Who’s had the experience of dating a fuckboy? We all know them! It’s that guy. You know; you know, the one who doesn’t respect you but relies on you all the time. He’s distant. He doesn’t care about your time. He won’t commit. He’s self-absorbed, does stupid things and fucks with other’s emotions. I feel like the majority of the guys I’ve been with or had any form of chemistry with have been fuckboys and it’s had a bit of a negative impact on my dating life, or actually, lack off. I’ve been used so many times by fuckboys that it’s become the norm for me to keep going back to them.

    How do you spot a fuckboy?

    Beware the fuckboy

    It would be easy if they walked around with a sign above their head saying “Avoid like COVID. I’m gonna text you once in three months, then you’re gonna come over and give me the best head ever”.

    Alas, life isn’t all black and white.

    It was a while before I experienced a true fuckboy. I don’t have any contact with him now, only maybe when I’m a little bit tipsy and I might slide into his DM’s. I’ve met a few since then and developed a keen eye to spot them. So, here are my tips for spotting the fuckboys.

    They will do or say anything to have sex

    fuckboys are all about the sex
    (C) BIGSTOCK

    This is the first big red flag. There’s no romance involved. A true fuckboy will literally do or say anything to get you into bed. These include flattery, gaslighting and grovelling. Nothing is too low for them to try. The worst thing though is that they will do all this whilst actually do the bare minimum whilst doing it. They want to do it all on their terms. They will decide it, they will just sit there and let you crack on. Don’t forget; they don’t call them jobs for nothing.

    They’ll hang out with a lot of men

    Now, this might seem trivial; but they’ll always have a number of guys on the go at the same times. If they’re not committing; it’s probably because they’re playing the field and shagging a couple of blokes at the same time. They like to have options. They want to know that there are people around them that they could have sex with if they wanted it; and well, we all know gay men. They’re randy little blighters and probably be boning a different guy every night.

    They’ll always be a little fragile

    If you tell them you can’t hang out tonight – you’ve just caused world war three. They’ll barrage you with texts about how flakey you are, or you’ll get a torrent of abuse and probably turn it round and accuse you of being a fuckboy. You can’t hold them accountable either; they don’t like that one little bit. Fuckboys are unable to accept any form of responsibilty for their poor behaviour.

    You can’t change a fuckboy

    Don't waste time on trying to change a fuckboy. It won't work!
    CREDIT: © oneinchpunch Depositphotos

    Don’t even start. They won’t change because they do not want to. They will do what they want to do because their world revolves completely around them. They do not care about anyone else but themselves. THEY ARE USERS.

    Fuckboys aren’t nasty, horrible, people

    They just don’t know how to have serious, mature relationships. You should pity them; and get rid of them. It might be hard at the start, but it’s gonna be better for you in the long run. You’re gonna be a stronger person for it. If you recognise some of this behaviour then congratulations; you’ve admitted it. Now you can start some make some changes in your life. Most fuckboys would never acknowledge it, so the fact you actually have, means you have the possibility to change.

    The sad thing is that; fuckboys are out there, and you need to be aware. Also remember, that there are decent guys out who aren’t like that all; and that’s something that we all should covet.

    We are worth more. Remind yourself that.

  • Olly Alexander wants you to check your balls

    Olly Alexander wants you to check your balls

    So recently, Years and Years singer, Olly Alexander, asked his 534,000 Instagram followers to ask him questions and we learned a few things about him like he once dated a French girl, he’s learning Spanish and his ideal date would involve UFO spotting… but there was another message, which is pretty crucial…

    He cares about your balls. And as it’s Movember he was asked about guys checking their balls for lumps and bumps…

    He told his fans, “please everybody who’s got balls, please check them after you’ve had a shower or after a bath, if you feel anything that’s out of the ordinary, please go and speak to someone”

    Such sage advice. If you’ve not got a GP then use the NHS website to find one local to you and get registered.

    So what else did we learn about Olly Alexander during his Ask Me Anything?

    Is Olly a spiritual person? Well, it turns out that actually yes. Before becoming a huge pop star Olly’s first job (when he was 14) was working in a shop called Moonstones, and they sold gems and crystals.

    The Years and Years lead singer admitted that he can’t grow as moustache!

    Is he bookish or a TV fanatic, well, according to the singer, “I love both of those things. I want to have books and TV.

    Does Olly Alexander speak other languages?

    He speaks a little French and showed of his skills, plus he also revealed that he “loved with a French girl for a bit”. Oh and he speaks a bit of Spanish…

    What's Olly Alexander's perfect date?

    Speaking of dating, if you wanted to take Olly Alexander on a date, here’s the things that would really excite him,

    • Going into space
    • Meeting Galadriel
    • Talking about reality TV
    • An extreme assault course or physical challenge
    • playing with cats / dogs or any animals
    • Infiltrating a cult from the inside
    • ufo spotting
    • LARPing under water
    • telekenisis
    • watching reality TV
    • napping.

    BUY Years and Year music from iTunes |  Amazon

  • FILM REVIEW | Bare – For fans of male nudity – and dance

    Rating: 4 out of 5.

    In the new documentary film Bare, these men are whittled down to eleven who rehearse and perform the premiere of Belgian choreographer Thierry Smit’s new dance piece ‘Anima Ardens.’ Director Aleksandr M. Vinogradov’s captures the auditions, and rehearsals, in this documentary that is both revealing, sexy and fun. Filmed in Brussels, the men, all presumably professional dancers, jump at the chance of working with Smits, a well-known choreographer who set up his own company in 1990, and who has created over 30 dance performances. His dance pieces are contemporary, with fusions of pop, queer and often provocative aesthetics included.

    The eleven men have no problem getting naked. One, during the early stages of the audition, raises the question as to why the camera is in the room. The explanation is that a documentary will be made about this process answers the question, and the show goes on. However we really don’t get to know any of the dancers individually, and Smits, front and centre, also remains an enigma. But combining Smits with the dancers in their daily struggle to get the dance moves correct, with Smits not quite knowing exactly what he is looking for, brings mystery and drama into play.

    All the dancers are very sexy, of course especially when naked, but after a bit, the nudity becomes almost invisible (but not quite) and it’s the performance piece they are rehearsing that takes centre stage because it’s unconventional. All the dancers appear to be very comfortable with each other, and near the end, they are all very playful in the showers as they clean up after a day of rehearsal. And Bare cleverly ends as the first performance of ‘Anima Ardens’ begins. Lucky for us, just a quick Google search will lead you to see the actual dance piece in its entirety. 

    Bare is indeed bare; it’s sexy, raw and in your face.

    Bare held its world premiere at Hot Docs and has also been featured at Cinema Diverse, Doc NYC and DocEdge.

    Look for it hopefully at UK film festivals in 2021.

  • 82% of men feel they can’t cry in public because of toxic masculinity

    82% of men feel they can’t cry in public because of toxic masculinity

    A survey has shown that a majority of men want to be able to cry more without the fear of being judged, because of, yep, toxic masculinity.

    But crying isn’t the only activity men want to do more of. According to a recent YouGov poll currently, one in twenty men now wear makeup, but the number of those who would actually want to wear it is far higher.

    A new survey of around 1,200 men conducted by Direct2Florist shows that if it wasn’t for the fear of being judged a whopping 65% would wear makeup.

    [totalpoll id=”126354″]

    And judgement from others wasn’t just stopping guys from applying some foundation. Shockingly 73% would be more physically affectionate with friends, 70% would like to admit they loved bubble baths and weirdly 55% said they’d read more novels by female authors if they didn’t feel so judged.

    toxic masculinity is holding back men from doing so many things

    This week, Harry Styles sparks debate by appearing on the cover of Vogue in a dress. 

    Whilst trends are changing, it’s clear there’s a push-and-pull between toxic masculinity and changing gender roles. 

    Toxic masculinity and its prevalence in society is holding back men from doing so much, including, loving musicals, loving bubble baths and worryingly crying in front of other people.

    Simon Stirling, MD of Direct2Florist, said, “Harry Styles wearing a dress on the cover of Vogue has sparked debate about masculinity and gender norms in 2020. Whilst most have seen the look as a positive, some have reacted uncomfortably towards the look. We’ve recently noticed consumer trends suggesting a rise in men buying flowers for themselves and this, along with conversation off the back of the Vogue cover, lead to the debate around what men are comfortable with these days. Our survey has revealed there’s still a long way to go for most.”

    “Whilst some of these, like liking rom coms and having bubble baths are a little bit silly, some, like not being comfortable crying or being affectionate with friends, do suggest the challenges some are still dealing with when it comes to toxic masculinity. This year especially mental health is more important than ever, and with International Men’s Day this week it’s important any men struggling make a point of opening up to friends and family.”

  • Tories fail to renew bullying projects aimed at ending homophobic bullying which makes classrooms toxic for LGBT+ students

    Tories fail to renew bullying projects aimed at ending homophobic bullying which makes classrooms toxic for LGBT+ students

    Funding aimed at reducing homophobic bullying of LGBT+ students in England has been apparently pulled by the Government, as new research shows that just 27% of students think that their school is a safe space for classmates to be themselves.

    A report by the BBC has discovered that funding for programmes targetting homophobic and transphobic bullying in English schools has ended, with no signs of renewal by the Conservative government.

    The funding which added up to around £4 million, was specifically set aside to help with anti-LGBT+ bullying, but according to the government, the funding was always due to end in March 2020. The programme began back in 2014, under one of the most progressive Conservative governments when it came to LGBT+ rights, under the leadership of David Cameron.

    According to the BBC, funding was “quietly” pulled in March, while the world’s attention was focused on the Coronavirus pandemic and schools began to close across the UK.

    The funding has not been reinstated.

    The Government Equalities Office said to the BBC “The anti-bullying grant fund, which provided 2,250 schools across the country with materials and training, was always due to end in March 2020.”

    Majority of students do not believe that it’s safe to come out as LGBT+

    Bullying of LGBT+ students is rife in the UK.
    Wokandapix / Pixabay

    New research by the Diversity Role Models (DRM), which received funding between January 2019 and March 2020 found that just 27% of students reported that they thought their school would be a safe environment for classmates to come out as gay, lesbian, bi or transgender.

    DRM undertook a survey of nearly 12,000 students, parents and governors of secondary and primary schools.

    It found that homophobic, biphobic and transphobic language was reported as common by 42% of year five and six primary school students and by 54% of secondary school students.

    Seventy-one per cent of teachers say that they have witnessed homophobic bullying and was it was found to be much more common than bullying related to other characteristics such as religion.

    Education works

    The survey also showed that the levels of homophobic, biphobic and transphobic bullying decreased when schools educated their pupils about LGBT+ identities and relationships, however as it stands only 20 per cent of secondary school students report learning about LGBT+ identities.

    Chief executive of Diversity Role Models, Adam McCann comments, “These findings show how dangerous any further delays to LGBT+ inclusive RSE will be for students. Our report shows a clear correlation between learning about LGBT+ identities and lower levels of homophobic, biphobic and transphobic language and bullying.” 

    “Staff, parents and carers and governors underestimate the level of discrimination in schools compared to students. It is no exaggeration to talk about the safety of these students. Action must be taken immediately to create safer, more inclusive learning environments. Bullying has an undisputed negative impact on attendance, attainment, life chances and mental health.”

    THEGAYUK understands that as it stands there has been no renewal of any of the projects.

  • BBC Radio 1 commits to not playing Fairytale of New York with THE homophobic slur

    BBC Radio 1 commits to not playing Fairytale of New York with THE homophobic slur

    The BBC has announced that it will play an edited version of the Christmas classic, The Fairytale Of New York.

    Without fail the song, which was first released in 1987 has caused an uproar every year in recent memory when it is played, in full, on radios in the UK, come to December-time.

    The song has long offended many people in the gay community and finally, the BBC has said it will play an edit of the song which does not contain the slur “Faggot” on its youth-orientated radio station, Radio 1.

    It will, however, continue to play the original version complete with the problematic lyric on its other mainstream radio station, Radio 2. DJs on 6 Music, will be able to choose from both versions.

    Fairytale Of New York will have its homophobic lyric removed by BBC Radio 1

    On Radio 1 DJs will instead play an edited version, with a different lyric sung by one of the song’s singers, Kirsty MacColl, the corporation said. The addition lyric was sung by MacColl on Top Of The Pops in 1992, eight years before her death at the age of 41.

    A BBC spokesman said, “We know the song is considered a Christmas classic and we will continue to play it this year, with our radio stations choosing the version of the song most relevant for their audience.”

    This isn’t the first time that Radio 1 has used an edited version of the song. In 2007, the station censored the offending word, but soon reinstated it after a public backlash. So it will be interesting to see if a similar backlash happens in 2020.

    What’s the problem with “Fairytale of New York”?

    The problem with “Fairytale of New York” is the line, “You scumbag, you maggot, you cheap lousy faggot.”

    Some in the LGBT+ community find the word offensives, while others don’t.

    The one key element is that songs that contain other offensives slurs often use edited versions, which either bleep out a slur or have another word dubbed in. Up until now, the original version of Fairytale Of New York did not have an edit to play.

    Last year, there were hundreds of complaints after Gavin and Stacey characters Nessa and Bryn sung the unedited version in a Christmas special broadcast on the BBC.

    In 2018 the song was crowned the nation’s favourite Christmas song.

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