A reader is concerned about rimming his BF. Our agony uncle gets to the bottom of it.

Dear Toby.

It’s great that you and your boyfriend are opening up about what you both want sexually – and rimming is quite a popular activity for guys both receiving and giving. Many see it as a warm-up activity before bottoming – as it can help relax them. It is also very pleasurable, particularly as there are lots of nerve endings around the hole.

So what is rimming?

Simply put, it means you “eating out” his ass. This can include licking, lapping and kissing his hole, the perineum, that’s the bit between the hole and scrotum and his cheeks.

Some guys love a darting motion with the tongue in and on their holes while some, love the long lapping motions, some love the mix of both. Your boyfriend will let you know what he really likes – just listen out for his moans and groans.

Some guys will love the feel of a beard against their skin, others maybe a little sensitive – the great thing is that there is no real wrong way of rimming. Experimentation is your friend.

If your boyfriend loves being rimmed it’s likely that he’ll know to be properly clean “down there” and won’t present you with “chumber nuts“, but if you want to be safe, then why not try out a rimming scenario in your shower first.

Tasting options?

If it’s the taste that you’re really unsure about you can try some flavoured lube. The great thing about flavoured lube is that it also can help you, help your boyfriend prep for bottoming as you can start to use your fingers and as well as your tongue – if that’s where the rimming is leading to.

However, if your boyfriend is fresh out the shower, there’s not likely to be any noticeable taste.

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Are there health issues with rimming?

If you’re concerned about the health implications of rimming, of which there are some, you can read more here, but you can use a dental dam if you’re very worried. A dental dam is simply a sheet (usually latex) that covers the hole – acting as a barrier between your tongue and his ass.

You shouldn’t feel pressured into doing an activity you really don’t want to do, but I’m a great believer in “don’t say no, till you give it a go” for most things in life, so if you’re comfortable, then why not try it out once, there’s a great satisfaction to give and receiving pleasure to your partner, hopefully, he’ll repay the kindness with something you’d like done to you.

If it’s a firm no, then you should explain to your BF that you’re uncomfortable with the idea and he should respect that.

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