Have you heard about nugget shaming? Well, boys, it's something we need to talk about.

Have you heard about nugget shaming? Well, boys, it’s about time we talked about it.

The terminology might be new but it’s something most bottoms will know. That feeling of dread as your top pulls his dick out of your butt and your lower colon has left a little “gift”, the nugget if you will.

You see, sometimes we forget, both tops and bottoms, that our booties have more than one use. It’s not just a sexy plaything it’s actually the place were our bodies evacuate the waste from our bodies and it can’t be expected to be 100 percent clean 100 percent of the time – because our bodies are constantly making new poops. It’s nature’s miracle. It’s natural and you can’t stop it, nor should you want to.

Let’s examine this. Porn tells us, and let’s face it, that’s where we get most of our sex education, thanks to a woefully inadequate sex ed policy, that bottoms must ready 100. At a moment’s notice a bottom might be expected to be able to take a 10 incher immediately, for a 20 to 30-minute pounding and at the end must not expel wind or have any trace of the substance that usually comes out… lest it ruins the atmosphere. That expectation isn’t necessarily disposed upon us by toxic tops, nope, sometimes that expectation is all us – and why wouldn’t it be, in the absence of education, expectation is sometimes all we have.

Of course, bottoms will have their tricks – half an hour of douching, Immodium, fibre supplements, yes, even the rhythm methods can be used, I’ve even heard of some porn stars eating nothing but fruit and ice for up to two days before a shoot, but ultimately we can never be sure that when you pull your d out of our a’s that it’s not doing to produce a little nugget for you – and maybe we need to be okay with that.

After all, that’s why we have wipes, towels and showers isn’t it?

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So give your partner a break and don’t shame him if an accident happens.

We recently asked some tops what they thought of poop incidents, on the whole (pun intended), guys were supportive, but for some, it was a deal breaker.

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Shame really.

About the author: Jake Hook
The editor and chief of THEGAYUK. All in a previous life wrote and produced songs on multi-platinum records.